Russ: You are ABSOLUTELY CORRECT that those are the most important questions!!!!!! I'll answer them in order:

I like the sound of the banjo in question, but I haven't educated myself sufficiently (yet!) to know which sound is "right". I'll have to haunt a music store or two, and have an employee or a friend say, "Now, you'll notice that this model sounds more metallic than that one, and the other one is thumpy..." So far, I've depended on a couple of people I know from the local folk-song society who know banjos to tell me that this banjo has a good sound. My inner instinct says "sweet but a bit soft" but the impression of volume may change as I learn more and become less tentative in my playing of the instrument. One thing I will do is to have a banjo-playing friend play this banjo so I can hear how it ought to sound!

Do I think the relationship will last? That depends not only on the sound but also on the looks and feel of the thing. I fell in love with the looks of it when it came out of the case, before I'd ever touched it. And it feels right "on me", in my hands. So if I don't get this particular banjo, it's likely that I'll end up with a similar one.

The action seems easy and good, though again I'll need to follow a few lessons from the instruction book and practice in order to be sure, over time, that it's right for me (and I'll have to compare it with other banjos, and I'll have to ask a knowledgable friend to check the action, too).

Again, Russ, you are SO RIGHT about the relationship between human and instrument: if each is not supportive of the other, it'll be an unhappy marriage. The instrument will live in its case, and the human will be poorer for it, not only monetarily but musically.