Very important historical information here:

Most people don't know that in 1912, Hellman's Mayonnaise was manufactured in England. The Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in VeraCruz, Mexico which was to be the next port of call forthe great ship after New York City. The people of Mexico eagerly awaited the first delivery and were very upset at the news of the sinking. So much that they declared a national day of mourning which they still observe today.

The Holiday is known, of course, as: Sinko de Mayo.

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A guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"

She yells, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!"

Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.

After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."

To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean $200!?!"