Well, this will turn into a Lyrics Add as soon as the one hole is plugged, and ) ye nautical ones, what is a cockatool?

THE MERMAN
As recorded by The Wolfe Tones on “The Anthology of Irish Song” (2008)

1. I'm a sailor man from Wexford town; I've sailed the seven seas.
I will tell you a true story of the sunny southron seas.
We were caught up in the doldrums while waiting for a breeze,
When the stillness of the day was broke by a merman in the deep blue seas.
Well, the captain he slept below while the crew they lay about,
When down in the ocean-wise we heard this mighty shout.
His hair was red; his eyes were green; his beard was floating free.
He'd a long green tail that could kill a whale that waggled in the deep blue sea.

CHORUS: And the mermaids looked so beautiful as they swum around by the shore,
But this merman with his fishy tail I’d never seen before.
And sailors tell the tallest tales; I never told a lie.
He'd a long green tail that could kill a whale that wobbled as he swam close by.

2. Was it Neptune that appeared to us from his mansions in the deep?
Then the cook O'Toole, well, he ran below, woke the captain from his sleep,
And the captain came on deck at once, took a look into the deep.
"I've never seen the likes of this!" the merman then he soon did greet.
"Then who are you? Where do you come from? What do you want here?"
Then he shook his tail; it rocked the boat; it filled our hearts with fear.
"You've dropped your anchor on my house; it's blockin’ up me door,
And the wife, the mermaid, she's trapped inside, and my children can't get out no more!" CHORUS

3. Well, we quickly hoisted anchor, boys, and the merman then did smile.
"Sure, me name is Patrick John O'Rourke; I came from Erin's isle.
It was many years ago from now I was shipwrecked on the reef
When this pretty mermaid she rescued me from the perils of the ocean deep.
And we very soon were married way down in the deep blue sea.
Now I'm happy and contented with me wife and family,
Though I oft-times wished I could go home and live on Ireland's shore.
But I'm committed to the ocean deep;* I can't go home again no more." CHORUS TWICE