Of teetotalers...

There's man a man both young and strong
has been brought to his sarcophagus
Through pouring water, icy cold
Down his warm oesophagus.


or, if you prefer, a toast:

"Here's to a temperance supper
With water in glasses tall, With coffee and tea to finish...
And me no where near it at all."

Walrus (heading for the pub)