We live very close to a canal - fortunately more interesting to our 4 cats than a fast main road 50 yards away. However, it is a never ending larder - which perhaps accounts for the interest.

One classic 'present' was one of many large rats which appear with regular monotony. This was one of the few that was live although in this case not very. I collected it in a strong plastic bag, completed its demise by swinging said bag very hard against a garden wall several times (apologies to those as squeamish as me) and launched said bag and contents into the aforementioned canal. Yes I appreciate the ecological issues here - I apologise!

About 4 weeks later I can downstairs early one morning - half asleep as usual - to see a wet and most certainly well-dead body on the hall mat. Beside it a small chunk of plastic sheet ... and further on in the next room the remains of The Plastic Bag!!!!

So one of our little delights (we wouldn't be without them) had rescued this bag from the canal (it must have drifted to the edge) dragged it up a steep overgrown bank, about 100 yards down the back lane, over several high fences, through the cat flap in the back door and then removed said offensive object!! To this day we don't know which of them it was. Needless to say, the rat went back in another bag and in the bin this time!

And then there was being woken up one morning by a large duck quacking in the back garden... it had a broken neck and had to be put down by the vet. The perpetrator (a cat called 'Dog' - a story not worth telling) is no longer with us, having, some years later, left for the Happy Catching Ground.

And then there was the time one peed in my open (empty) mandolin case... they still sniff at it as they go past, even after 5 years! The plush lining took ages to dry out. It stays shut now.

Nick