Back in the mid-Seventies, Kraft Foods, Inc. came out with "Koogle"—flavored peanut butter. It came in four flavors: chocolate, vanilla, cinnamon, and banana. I understand that Koogle, like the Edsel, was a product that grew out of extensive consumer research. Launched with lots of TV commercials, it sank like a rock. I understand the Jif Peanut Butter (Proctor and Gamble) is planning on trying it again.

I'll stick with my jar of Adams peanut butter (no lard added, just peanuts) and my jar of grape jelly. I love the classics.

I keep an X-Acto knife handy to fillet the TV Guide when it comes. You know, all those stiff cardboard pages inserted among the newsprint, so they'll pop open every time you pick it up to see how to waste some time? Invariably they're ads for kitch doo-dads and dust-catchers, like a ceramic figurine of Princess Di or Elvis Presley under a glass dome, or a little doggie with sad eyes, or a plate commemorating Buffy the Vampire Slayer. "Five easy payments of $39.95 each," and the ad always says something like "Limited Edition Collectors' Item." I heard someone on "Antiques Road Show" say, "If it's advertised as a collectors' item, it isn't!"

Don Firth