Thanks John, but I've seen enough of gargoyle's posts to know I should just ignore them.

My heart goes out to you, AMergin. Your experience is not off-topic, it's a very likely scenario for my future. I'm glad to hear you eventually became friends, and hope your future gets even brighter. You sound like a wonderful person.

Kat and gypsy, thanks for your kind words. Sometimes I feel like I must be the only one who thinks my own happiness is a good thing for my kids. I come from a long line of conservative, self-sacrificing people. It's hard not to believe people who tell me I don't know what I'm doing.

We will be getting something in writing, kat. It's quickly becoming apparent that our disagreements go even deeper than I realized.