Transcribed from the sound file here (They might require you to register before you can access that page, but it's worth it because they let you listen to entire cuts!)

THE PIG GOT UP AND SLOWLY WALKED AWAY
(as sung by Frank Crumit)

One evening in October,
When I was about one-third sober,
And was taking home a load with manly pride,
My poor feet began to stutter,
So I lay down in the gutter,
And a pig came up and lay down by my side.
Then we sang a song, "Fair Weather"
And "Good Fellows Get Together"
Till a lady passing by was heard to say:
She says, "You can tell a man who boozes
By the company he chooses,"
And the pig got up and slowly walked away.
As the pig got up and slowly walked away,
Slowly walked away, slowly walked away,
As the pig got up and he turned and winked at me
As he slowly walked away.

I also well remember
One evening in November
When I was creeping home at break of day,
For in my exhilaration,
I engaged in conversation
With a cab-horse, right on the corner of Broadway.
I was filled up to the eyeballs
With a flock of gin and highballs,
So I whispered to the cab-horse old and gray.
I says, "It's these all-night homeward marches
That gave us both fallen arches."
And the old horse laughed and slowly walked away.
As the old horse laughed and slowly walked away,
Slowly walked away, slowly walked away,
And the old horse laughed and he turned and winked at me
As he slowly walked away,
As he slowly walked away.