Kansas Boys

Hello, girls, listen to my voice
Don'tcha fall in love with no Kansas boys!
For if you do your fortune, it will be
Hoecake and hominy and sassafras tea.

They'll take you out on a jet-black hill
Take you there so much against your will
Leave ya there to perish on the plains
For that is the way with the Kansas range.

Take you to a cabin with a huge log wall
Nary a window in it at all
Sandstone chimney and a puncheon floor
Clapboard roof and a button door.

When they go to milk, they milk in a gourd
Throw it in a corner and cover with a board.
Some gits plenty and some gits none
For that is the way with the Kansas Run!

When a boy goes courtin' he takes along a chair.
First thing he says, "Has yer daddy killed a bear?"
Next thing he says as he sets down,
"Madam, yer johnnycake is bakin' brown!"

When a young man falls in love
First it's "Honey" and then "Turtle-dove".
After he's married, no sich thing:
"Git up and get m'breakfast, ya good-fer-nothin' thing!"

There are, I am told, a lot of other, less printable verses to this. DRO