Tim …

Here's one about media spin … after "The Man From The Daily Mail".

THE MAN FROM THE BBC

Says the editor we've got ourselves a problem
Armagh is all aflame
With the fire of a mighty celebration
From the Bannfoot down to 'Glen
No horror-shock on the six o'clock
For the good folks at their tea
We need a bit of fighting to make the news exciting
Says the man from the BBC

Oh every Joe from oul' Freecrow
Is to be feared sir
That what I heared sir
Every boy and man who follows the oul' Clans
Is very tight sir
In a fight sir
And in Francis Street every man you'd meet
Is a pure-bred rapparee
Ah, now sir, you needn't worry
I'll get you an oul' story
Says the man from the BBC

Oh, Lurgan is a very wicked town sir
To laws they pay no heed
The place it is seething with sedition
They're a wanton, reckless breed
Just one excuse and they'll cut loose
With their fists they'll all make free
It's the roughest spot on earth
You'd want to give it a wide berth
Says the man from the BBC

Cos every Tom Dick or Harry
From Kilwilkie or the Tarry's
Looking trouble
Throwing rubble
If their abode is out by the Lough Road
You better run sir
Here they come sir
Every road, estate
Is alive with hate
For common decency
Ah now sir you needn't sweat
I'll get you a story yet
Says the man from the BBC

If we spot a wee rumpus near the Barracks
Involving three or four
With a little bit of clever cut-and-paste sir
It'll look like many more
Forget proportion
A bit of distortion
Makes for very good TV
A bit of a commotion
Might get me a promotion
Says the man from the BBC

Not that I'm a cynic or anything!