Thanks, Jande...

I've been really despairing today, and that hit just the right spot. Though I still feel sick with the enormity of what needs to be done.

People tell me to get a job, any job.

When I was in Burlington, I searched for 6 months for "any job" and didn't get one. I'm not suited to that work. Maybe I cope too well with not being able to see properly. Maybe I cope too well with being tired all the time, and needing more sleep than normal. Maybe I look too normal, and walk as if I can see, when I can't even read the street signs if I'm not directly underneath them.

Today, on my way back from the place I stayed last night, I missed 4 streetcars. I missed the first 2 because I didn't see that the stop said "sunday stop" until they'd gone by. I missed the second one because I was between stops and didn't see it coming. I missed the last one because I was between stops and was getting close to bathurst, and didn't want to pay $2.25 by then to just go between bathurst and spadina. So I walked all the way from near landsdowne. (5 city blocks, which is huge.)

But I'm thankful, very thankful, for the person who let me stay in her home last night so that I could have a successful allergy treatment. And I'm thankful to the person who got me that treatment, and who cleaned his car so that no trace of pets would be left in it, and who drove me to the clean house where I would be able to stay.

I am no longer allergic to pets. The treatment worked. So I can go do the job I need to do to pay off my rent for the last couple of months.

Thank you, Little Hawk.