Dear Mr T. Watt,

Remarkably, I have just seen a patient with a remarkably similar complaint! In his case he was wearing a pair of Gibson J-45s (approximately size 11 for those using imperial units) which he had mistaken for his shoes. Professional courtesy of course obliged me to treat this person with the concerned and serious, yet friendly, demeanour that my patients' expect. However, I was able to enjoy the amusement of the situation in a restrained manner in the privacy of my own study.

We must be thankful to our luthier friends that none of them has yet considered sandalwood, Santalum albumL., yet for building instruments!

Yours sincerely,

Dr. Guitar