I agree with the above, especially about helping out with the basics of life, and also with any notifying of official departments. We were lucky about finding the funeral director when my Mum died suddenly, 6 months ago - it seems like only a few weeks ago to me - because my sister and I went to school with someone who is now a funeral director. As it happened he and his assistant were wonderful.

Just helping to organise the funeral and other arrangements is a huge task, with a lot of decisions to make in a very short time, and a lot of friends and family to notify.

And being there is a comfort - to talk, to listen, or just to be silent together as needed.

My main suggestion, however, is to be prepared after a few weeks or months to deal with the aftermath of grief. My grief has recently kicked in properly, now that the main tasks are out of the way, which kept me busy and not able to think too much. People were very helpful and supportive at the time but now I feel as if they would think I was malingering if I talked about how I feel, when in fact I was in a bit of a haze before this and it didn't really sink in to me properly, until now, about the true meaning of our loss.

So, I would suggest that you keep a watch on how your sister is feeling for at least a few months and be prepared to listen and talk to her when she is ready for that stage.

Helen