He sang his songs to Mary Jane, The Folksinger
He straddled a goat and the mountains rang, The Folk Singer
At first Mary Jane was to be his bride,
But as his fame grew he just pushed her aside,

The lyrics so bad I can't abide, The Folksinger.

Assuming that this is the crap you are after, then I guess you are quite unlucky. And to make your desolation almost complete, I actually have the lyrics somewhere. Should you wish to continue on your kamikaze mission I could even post the tune.

Your future happiness is in your hands, but I would bear no responsibility for the outcome. I must request your authorisation in order to proceed

My sympathies,

John