GLORIOUS PREDICTION
(© Lou and Peter Berryman)

  "Someone sent us a religious pamphlet. It showed a painting of some kids picnicking with a lion, a sheep, a snake, a grownup, and other creatures.
  "The literature spoke of the coming of this Heaven on Earth. But aspects of this prediction are confusing. How could the mail carrier's Heaven on Earth be the same as the dog's?"

          G                 D7               G
  In the shower, we heard strangers ring our doorbell twice.
            C                 G      D7        G
  We were dripping when they told us of their view:
           C            G    D7           G
  How the lion will be lying... with the little mice
             C          G       D7     G
  When the glorious prediction comes true.    

 So, we asked them as we dried off what this really meant:
  Vicious pumas, will they settle for fondue?
  Will the weasels stop their golfing with the president
  When the glorious prediction comes true?    

                    C          G       F#7    G
  CHORUS: When the glorious prediction comes true,
             C          G       D7     G
  When the glorious prediction comes true,
           C              G    D7          G
  Will it be as good for me as... it will be for you,
             C          G       D7     G
  When the glorious prediction comes true?

Will there be less TV football 'fyou don't like football?
Will there be more TV football if you do?
'N'fyou're not sure if you like it, will there be some football
When the glorious prediction comes true?

Will the lovers who once dumped you for the hell of it,
Will they mention since they left you they've been blue,
Brokenhearted, suicidal, also celibate
When the glorious prediction comes true? CHORUS

No more potholes, no more big words, no more clip-on ties,
No more Muzak, no more soapy residue,
No more poor folks, no more rich folks, no more Jazzercize
When the glorious prediction comes true?

No more itching, no more bombing, no more liverwurst,
No depravities, no more cavities, no more flu,
No more Christmas merchandising before August first,
When the glorious prediction comes true? CHORUS

Will the tenants have their landlords let 'em stay for free?
Will the landlords have their rent paid when it's due?
Will this somehow not be seen as a discrepancy
When the glorious prediction comes true?

Will there be nothing parasitic on your Chia Pet?
No accordion playing people 'cept for Lou?
No more strangers ringing doorbells when you're dripping wet
When the glorious prediction comes true? CHORUS

[From the songbook "Frescoes and Bowling Balls: 47 More Songs by Lou & Peter Berryman", 1996. Also on their album, "Some Kinda Funny," 1998. Both of which can be purchased from the Berryman Boutique.]