I was thinking of something to the tune of "Killing Floor"...

Well I burned my lemon, till the blister big and white
Yeah I burned my lemon, till the blister big and white
Now my girl cain't squeeze it, be no lemonade tonight...

Then I was thinking of Robert Johnson's "Hot Tamales"...

Heat'd my wally till it's red hot, yass you know what I mean
Heat'd my wally till it's red hot, yass you know what I mean
Well I fired up my modem
Jumped online
Smelled somethin' cookin'
Looked down to find
I'd
Heat'd my wally till it's red hot, yass, you know what I mean

But I think I"ll finally go with ...

Well I wish I had a heat-protected wiener
That is what I wish I had to piss
For if I had a heat-protected wiener
My laptop would'na burned it to a crisp

You guys are great -- great song entries! I don't have any of the GG's usual stock of awards but I want to do something so I shall give my own brand of award, the

BRONZED MOUSE DROPPING

(or BMD) for sending anything at all (other awards of more varied sorts to come after a longer period as per the GG's practice) to:

McGrath of Harlow for this painfully funny quatrain:

Your heatin' part will make you weep
You'll cry and cry and try to sleep
But sleep won't come the whole night through
Your heatin' part will tell on you...

And to Tinker for this excruciatingly humorous couplet:

I gets out of my bed, laid it down on the floor
I but it scorched my ol' pencil, it won't write no more

And to Katlaughing for this hot verse:

Hey Dude, don't be afraid
Even with blisters you'll still get her
The minute the heat gets under your skin
Whoops, there goes your pecker!

And to Genie for this wickedly funny chorus:

I fell prey to a burning Lap of Fire,
As the files loaded down
The heat got higher,
And it turned my groin,
To a Lap of Fire, a Lap of Fire.

Don't spend your BMD's all in one place, now. Accepted like cash in hundredths of places worldwide.

Keep up the good work, y'all!

Alex
O..O
=o=