The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #54172 Message #837329
Posted By: katlaughing
29-Nov-02 - 02:42 PM
Thread Name: BS: bullying advice
Subject: RE: BS: bullying advice
I think what Joe might have meant is, a person can get into what a friend of mine calls "victim head" a way of thinking about the situation which goes along the lines of hopelessness/helplessness feeling one cannot change a bad situation. Every person puts out "vibes" for lack of a better word which signals how confident they may feel or not. The bully might swagger. The victim may show, with body language, that they are not confident and thus easy prey. This is not to find fault, but just to explain what may attract the attention of arseholes like the teacher and the other students. The more your son can show through body language that he is sure of himself, the better.
Some bullies never give up, even if one ignores them. I spent 5 years in junior and high school, carrying my violin back and forth, everyday, being called a "scab" by a bully. I never told anyone and I finally just ignored him, though it hurt.
The teacher is in the wrong and should be dealt with immediately.
Helen went through some tough bullying at work at one point. Here are the threads about it: Help: Lost my sense of humour; Lost sense of humour - links to bullying advice.
You might also want to PM Alice in Montana as her son had problems with bullying at school a few years ago, actually had a broken bone from it!