In most cases in the US where there has been random, senseless shootings it seems to me that the kids who flip, flip on bullies or that they were victims of bullies. What could ever drive a normal well adjusted kid to do that. Guess what, they've been abused beyond reason & have been shut & shot down by a complete system that still think that "BOYS WILL BE BOYS". This abuse is illegal in the US. The bully has had the support of the system all along, instead of they're behavior being frowned upon it's backed by positive reinforcement. The bully has been at their trade of inflicting pain & deriving pleasure from the agony they've caused for a long time . They've also been getting away with this behavior for years & have mastered their abuse of others so that for the most part it seems to be the victim's fault. When the victim finally lashes back it's the victim who doesn't understand the ground rules & again ends up in a set up & is now in the bully's territory as, once more, the victim. The more the victim shows what the bully would call a positive response the more the bully goes at them. Another tactic is to get some other kid or kids (or the threat or another kid or kids)to have a go at the victim, it takes the heat off the bully, reinforces their power & adds more credence to "IT'S THE VICTIM FAULT" & it's the victim who's imagining all this & for some unknown reason is making this all up because no one ever sees anything happen but the victim looking like they're guilty & this bully who's sometimes cute, smart, athletic or is the school's charmer, teacher's pet or is a real sweetheart couldn't really behave like this. Some bully's go on to further their studies in colleges & find the field wide open & graduate to rape & on from there into the business world to continue their abuse, which some places still think that the victim's at fault & again the bully has worked the system for their own gain.

I have in the past talked with my son's teacher's & warned them that this or that bully was provoking my son & physically threaten him & that under no circumstances would I allow this to continue & that if my kid whacked the bully with a stick to protect himself the school had legally failed him & that the school, by me bringing this (always document) to their attention had not only failed but had also been forewarned & still allowed this bulling behavior to go on & therefore have opened themselves to civil and or criminal charges.

It seems that many are unaware of the trauma caused by the bully in the victim. Loss of self esteem, loss of friends & company (the bull will see to that), grades start drop when the kid is to worried about survival that they can't keep up their grades or god forbid suicide. In some cases the victim suffers from post traumatic stress syndrome. I don't know how it is in the UK but I've had the police involved & lodged assault charges. Here that can (over time) affect their accreditation if a pattern be shown & that the system likes less than trying to not be involved. In some states including, New Hampshire, the law mandates that schools to have in place a bullying policy. This differs from state to state. Specical ed & special needs kids are quite the target they see the world from a different perspective & therefore they're seen as different to the bully which is what they seem to hone in on. It can be to fat, to skinny, to tall, to short, to smart to stupid, talks funny so basically anything that makes him a bit different from others. At a recent bulling conference, a personal & professional arena for my wife, found that in one month 80% of the kids interviewed said that they had been bullied & that 29% admitted to bullying. The trend seems to be on the rise & so far nobodys been able to nail down any cause for this (quess what, it's allowed to fester). It also seems that girls can tend to be meaner & nastier. It allows seems that so far completely ignoring the bully is the most affective action to take. The bully doesn't get what they want & moves on. My heart really goes out for any parent that has to fight any system because their kid is a victim. This also takes it's toll on the parents & siblings, so these kids are running around causing concern & pain to the victim's families, who at this point have also become a victim. God pity the little terrorist when hell breaks loose & they're are on the recieving end of some flipped out kid aiming a pistol at them. It's now become a music thread. Good luck, Barry   

I'm The Bully
(words & music by Barry Finn)

CHORUS:
I'm the bully & you're my victim
I need the practice, you need the pain
I'm the bully & you're my victim
I'll keep on you & drive you insane

Oh how I love to stalk the weakling
And the outcast or the lame
Give me a nerd, a geek or a loner
These unfit prey I'll treat the same

chorus

A shove on the stairs when none are watching
A whisper of terror that none will hear
At a hundred paces I still can strike you
And keep it up year after year

Chorus

I'll chase you out of a crowed schoolyard
I'll ban you from the public park
You'll have no friends & no companions
You'll only have a broken heart

Chorus

I'll get others to gang up on you
The more I get the worst you'll look
When you finally fight back I've turned the tables
You're on my turf now & I wrote the book

Chorus

You can cry for help & beg for mercy
And tell the world just what I've done
You'll soon learn we're all against you
You lose again, in the end I've won.

Chorus

copyright Barry Finn 2000