The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #54172   Message #838001
Posted By: GUEST,Fred Miller
30-Nov-02 - 07:13 PM
Thread Name: BS: bullying advice
Subject: RE: BS: bullying advice
In 7th grade had a P.E. teacher who pathetically sank into the culture of the kids, and called attendance using a demeaning nickname for one sad, quiet girl, Rhonda. The kids loved him, and I to this day hate the guy. It would've been nice if I'd had the nerve to ask him why he didn't just call her by her name, but I didn't.

   I got the impression this teacher mis-understood your intent. Could you meet with him again and explain that you aren't interested in his opinions, advice, or world-wisdom, which one questions already, but in what he can do as a professional to address the problem? He said he knew about the girl baiting your son. Well. If it were my class I'd meet out a mild punishment to all, and let them thank whomever started it. His punishing your son simply encourages more disruptions, since that was the motive-- but what's his motive in responding as he did? Seems odd.

And I'd tell him any response other than a sensible, professional course of action, put it in writing, or keep it to himself--he can make his excuses to himself on his own time.

It's good your son knows you're on his side, and it's not all bad that he has to go through some degree of this, even if it changes him some. This stuff doesn't go away, and he's developing his strengh in the face of collective ugliness and insanity, which is a valuable life-skill for a man to have.

   If changing schools is an option, I'd allow myself one of those moments of perfect rudeness, when they are called for, before I moved on. There's an art to saying things you never will regret. Hope things get more tolerable for your son, before too long. Sounds like a good guy.