Big Tim said:

"Robin, you've lost me. Try plain English!"

Dunno what I'm sposed to explain.

There's the Glasgow bird/bush/bell:

"This is the bird that never sang,
This is the bell that never rang,
This is the fish that never swam"

The fish crops up in the lyric of "The Dear Green Place" I quoted earlier, but that's a literal salmon you could guddle for in the Clyde. As +if+. Try guddling for a salmon in the Clyde, and your hands would freeze off your wrists before you caught your supper.

... as to what the hell it means, +I+ could never work it out, but if you've a mind for puzzles and dirt ...

[g]

Robin