My worst song, at least that I every played in public, was a parody of those "Wango Tango" type songs that Ted Nugent used to do--my tune was called "Animal Hunger", it sounded vaguely like "Shakin' All Over", and contained this sterling bit of scansion:

"He's got a half a foot of dong,
Now that might not seem too long,
but when he locks it in her poon,
He nearly rocks her to the moon.

He's got ANIMAL HUNGER(Uh,Uh, Uh, Uh)
ANIMAL HUNGER(Uh,Uh, Uh, Uh)
ANIMAL HUNGER(Uh,Uh, Uh, Uh)
YEAH!"

Though I am now extremely embarassed by this, it was once a rather popular part of my show--it was so popular that someone had me record   it for an actual record label, though, it was never released, for some reason, they never wanted to hear anything else I'd written--