Ms Penelope Rutledge,

I'm sure that if you visited that jewel of South East London, (Royal) Eltham, you would be completely bowled over by that wonderful performer and fine figure of masculinity, Mr David Kenningham.

He can frequently be found at that pillar of culture (and listed building) "The Tudor Barn" on a Wednesday evening. The aforenamed building is of course only a short distance away from a royal palace.

You will be able to find several likenesses of this adonis at this site. He is at present unattached, but obviously, so many ladies are so captivated by his charm and good looks, that this situation cannot last long.

I'm sure that once you have made his aquaintance, both the agressive and overbearingly priggish Winston, and that poor lap-dog Oakley, will vanish from your affections in his favour.