How about...

The Souseafone: Fill a large man with beer, lay him down on a pub table. Two players then strike his belly with dulcimer hammers in elaborately rhythmic patterns. Note: Though this is traditionally
used for melodic percussion, when the man on the table joins in it can also become a wind instrument.


Hymenoptera Smallpipes:   Elaborately constructed cold wind system, consisting of a bag full of drone bees whose sound is passed through filtered amplification horns, creating B drones.   The air generated by their wingbeats is passed through a tube into the chanter, where periodically one of the bees escapes causing the piper to pibroch his pants. He sometimes also gets hives.


Soulenoid:   Large electromagnetic pipe organ mounted on the underside of a hot air balloon which flies over cemeteries. Energy of rising souls is trapped and the resulting current is conducted through a coiled wire generating a magnetic field which forces a plunger to operate the bellows providing air to the pipes. Plays Amazing Grace a lot. Also a few Doors songs.

p.j.