"spank mah britches and shet mah mouth!" - Cousin Bill
"Kiss mah ass in th' red!" - Uncle Rob
"Hope ya s**t an' fall back innit!" - Joe(a friend of mine)
"Way-ell, it's fer shur them gals aint a gonna starve to death." - Friend referring to a couple of upper middle class women we saw 'uptown' one time.
"Go cut me a switch!" - Grandma(whenever I'd misbehave)