When Hubby first started working in a large animal veterinary practice, I often had to answer the phone at home after hours. Many farmers don't like to talk about "delicate" subjects with a woman. I got used to that attitude and just tried to act like I wasn't shocked at anything. But the best one -- one that really had me baffled -- was when a farmer called and said his sow couldn't find her pigs. I relayed the message to Hubby who explained to me that the sow was having trouble giving birth.

Then there were all the times I had to get directions to a farm over the phone. I found it was best to act real dumb and repeat everything several times. I got to know lots of farmers and their wives from phone conversations, but had never met them. Hubby described me to them as, shall we say, not fit for public viewing. When they did meet me, there was a tremendous look of relief on their faces. Then Hubby would tell them that he'd rather take me with him than kiss me goodbye! Oh the stories, many just like in James Herriot's books.

Another expression: Can't see it from my house. (Meaning, I don't care unless it affects me.)