all stove up (my grandmother said this referring to stiffness from arthritis)

meaner 'n a snake

just like a snake in the grass (sneaky, lowdown person)

hips like a chicken snake (slim)

slicker 'n a minna's (minnow's) dick

more than you can shake a stick at (a lot)

teched in the head (crazy)

I can't talk 'cause I have a lot of chicks out just now. (said by a man with teenagers -- your chickens come home to roost)

rode hard and put up wet (mistreated, or lived a hard life -- originally referring to a horse)