Rustic, I don't have an answer, but there is a little bit of a song by Sweet Honey in the Rock... the title is escaping my sleep fogged brain... that I've used with groups of adolesents when trying to discuss violence. It always seems to raise as many questions as it answers.

Must I do unto others, before they do unto me
Must I go out and arm myself
To protect myself-From harm and injury
Don't you know that is not the lesson,
That I learnt on my momma's knee
Don't you know you must do unto others,
Only.. what you'd.. have them... do unto you..