Nah, what ya need is a big bowl of Pinto means (aka Manna From Heaven) with about half of a large chopped onion and a couple of big spoons of Mayonaise mixed in with it, a little pepper and salt and a couple of Bud long necks. Then, in a short while, hand me the matches and head for high ground, or upwind, whichever you prefer! (both would be the sensible thing!) ;-)