Tweed
We thank you for your concern over dear old oaklet but I'm afraid his obsession with Nurse Penny is incurable. We've tried both electric and meathaine shock treatment but sadly to no availe. We even sent him on a cruse on a Russian Icebreaker but the enforced isolation made him worse (and it would seem the owner of said ice breaker - somthing to do with a card game at a rediculus drunken hour and the russian captain deciding that he would be beter off giving oaklet the ship and going to live in siberia - the details arn't too clear). We have tried all the conventional drug treatments and even Mrs Drinkall's famous cure all. I'm afraid its a hopeless case we are at a loss. So we have decided to allow him to run with his fantasies but have provided Nurse Penny with a 24 hour armed guard so there is no need to worry about her.

Yours
Dr SP