The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #59418   Message #973897
Posted By: Little Hawk
28-Jun-03 - 02:23 PM
Thread Name: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
Oh! Oh! A direct posting from the Shatman (gasp!). Oh, Mr Shatner, I can only say that I bask in the warmth of your approval! Yes, indeed, and I should not have neglected to mention those commercials, which are incomparable examples of, of...well, words fail me to describe it.

Now here's a Star Trek scene coming to me...

(We are on the bridge of the original Enterprise, complete with cardboard bulkheads and little lighted diode thingies that blink on and off and make little "boop" sounds. Spock has just returned from a fact-finding mission to Megavulva 9, the mysterious planet of alien barhostesses. He is looking very, very grave...)

Kirk: "What's wrong, Mr Spock?"

Bones: "Yes, do look a litte green around the gills." (winks at the Captain)

Spock: "It's quite intriguing, Captain. I seem to have...lost my mojo."   

(Kirk looks very shocked and raises his eyebrows. Bones pops his left eyebrow up so high that it vanishes offscreen.)

Kirk: "How did it happen, Mr Spock?!"

Spock: "That is the strangest part of all, Captain. I recall nothing out of the ordinary happening whatsoever following my introduction to the alien barhostesses national curling team in their dressing rooms, but my mojo is definitely gone."

Bones: "Call me insensitive, but I didn't even know you had one."

Spock: "Doctor McCoy, these sort of intemperate personal remarks do not serve you well."

Kirk (grinning): "Well, don't look at me. I haven't got it." (turns decisively to anonymous crewmember in red pattern uniform) "Ensign Rogers! I...want you to prepare an away beam down there at once, and...find Mr Spock's mojo! I...will accompany the away team, of course. I...intend to get to the bottom of this!"

Ensign Rogers (formerly anonymous crewmember in red pattern uniform):
"Aye, sir!" (turns away toward camera, sweating profusely, and agonizes underneath his breath) "I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die..."