Oh, yes, Penny, I heard the stories about how good Catholic girls were not allowed to wear patent leather shoes. I suppose that every time I see a woman in black patent, I steal a glance to see if I can see anything "interesting' reflected. Never have seen a thing, but it has activated my imagination at times.
See? The story had the exact opposite effect it was supposed to have.

-Joe Offer, who never was very good at maintaining "custody of the eyes"-