I found the song Five drunken nights in the database but I know there are a few more verses than the ones here. I remember hearing it at a festival and the last verse was something like "I came home on Sat. night, drunk as drunk could be, I saw a man (some thing some thing) where I (something ) something, and I said to my wife.. " and so on..

I know the punchline was something like "But an Englishman that could last past ten, I'd never seen before." But I could be wrong.

Anyone know what I'm talking about or am I just losing it from too much time on teh internet?

Oh, and if anyone has the chords to it, I'd love to have them too,

Thanks a mil

Rob

If you go to the top of the page and hit "forum search" and put "drunken nights" in the subject box, it will bring up a recent long discussion on this song including answers to your questions.

Rosebrook

MAN: Last Saturday night when I came home as drunk as I could be,
There was a horse in the stable where my horse ought to be.
So I turned to my wife and I said unto she,
"Whose is that horse in the stable where my horse ought to be?"
WOMAN: Oh, you durned fool, you stupid fool, you fool, why can't you see,
That's nothing but a milk cow my mother left for me.
MAN: Oh, many miles have I traveled, a thousand miles or more,
But a milk cow with a saddle on, I'd never seen before.

MAN: Last Saturday night...
There was a coat on the coat-rack where my coat ought to be.
I turned to my wife...
Whose is that coat on the coat-rack where my coat ought to be?
WOMAN: Oh, you durned fool...
That's nothing but a blanket my mother left for me.
MAN: Oh, many miles...
But a blanket with buttons and pockets on, I'd never seen before.

MAN: Last Saturday night...
There was a hat on the hat-rack where my hat ought to be,
So I turned...
Whose is that hat...
WOMAN: Oh, you durned fool...
That's nothing but a chamber pot my mother left for me.
MAN: Oh, many miles...
But a chamber pot size six and seven-eighths I'd never seen before.

MAN: Last Saturday night...
There was a head on the pillow...
So I turned...
Whose is that head...
WOMAN: Oh, you durned fool...
That's nothing but a baby my mother brought to me.
MAN: Oh, many miles...
But a baby with a mustache and beard, I'd never seen before.

HTML line breaks added. --JoeClone, 9-Aug-02.

Here's an alternative last 2 verses.

(As I came home on a Saturday night, as drunk as drunk could be
I spied two hands upon her breasts, where my old hands should be.
I called to my wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me,
Who's hands are these upon your breasts, where my old hands should be?

Oh, you're drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool, and still you cannot see
'Tis nothing but a Living Bra Jane Russell gave to me.
Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more,
but fingernails on a Living Bra, I never saw before.

Now when I came home on Sunday night, a little after three.
I saw a man running out the door with his pants about his knee.
So I called to my wife and I said to her: would you kindly tell to me,
who was that man running out the door with his pants about his knee?

Oh you're drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool, and still you cannot see,
'Twas nothing but the tax collector the Queen sent to me.
Well, it's many a day I've travelled, a hundred miles or more,
But an Englishman that could last 'till three I never saw before.)

Slainte

Alison

The last verse I have also heard some very blue lyrics to, but would rather print here.

Rick

Now if I might trouble some one a whee bit more....

How do the chords go? (my ear for picking them out is pathetically bad.)

Thanx