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BS: Secrets of Witchcraft
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Subject: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft Junk emails From: SINSULL Date: 22 Jul 07 - 11:26 AM This is too funny. Platinum Express out of Austria is offering two free spells (for a small membership fee). 90% of all wizards and witches are wrong and are actually diminishing my magic by their mistakes. "Old Witchcraft Secrets" will show you in detail, how you can cast powerful spells. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 22 Jul 07 - 11:28 AM The spells are "personally tested". How can this be wrong? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Amos Date: 22 Jul 07 - 11:49 AM http://www.mudcat.org/thread.cfm?threadid=103480#2108605 is the destination of the link you provided, SINS -- it is a non-existant point on the same thread. Perhaps you mispronounced "Aitch-tee-ellimus!" or your wand needs a new battery? A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 22 Jul 07 - 12:11 PM T'is a spell that has been cast on the Link so that "The Secrets" cannot be revealed. An invisibility Screen has been put around your Link Sins which now is sheilding these ancient secrets from the eyes of those that would abuse the scared oath. *It wasn't me though...*giggle* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: GUEST,KT not logged in Date: 22 Jul 07 - 12:22 PM the scared oath, Alba? Was that on purpose? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 22 Jul 07 - 12:40 PM LOL Maybe I'd better subscribe... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Uncle_DaveO Date: 22 Jul 07 - 12:42 PM I think Sinsull's clicky should have been like this: CLICK HERE FOR MAGICAL CONNECTION Dave Oesterreich |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 22 Jul 07 - 12:45 PM *Rye smile* KT Darlin..... I have only learned recently about this scared oath..many outcomes depend on which Oath one chooses to take, the Sacred or the scared. Good to see you Darlin as always, hope all is good in your World Love Jude :>) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 22 Jul 07 - 12:49 PM Oh dear... "The truth is... you've been misled by self-proclaimed powerful wizards and witches... and the truth is that 99% of these 'professionals' are DEAD WRONG!" ROFLMAO |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Ebbie Date: 22 Jul 07 - 01:39 PM LOL I love the 'scared oath'. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 22 Jul 07 - 04:39 PM Personally, I think it's all a big smoke Screen...Double, double toil and trouble, and all that. I mean really how can ya block any of it, invisible Screen or not!? ShaZammm!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Rapparee Date: 22 Jul 07 - 05:12 PM I'll be happy to share The Secrets if you will only send me a little information about yourself: name, address. social security number, mother's maiden name, bank account number.... AND I will demonstrate a magical technique to have money disappear from your bank account! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 22 Jul 07 - 05:36 PM Eh actually, I have it on a good authority that the REAL start of that spell is hubble bubble toil and trouble Kat. Now if, and this is purely speculation on my part, one required to be unseen then why, if one has a knowledge of the Kraft, would one require a smoke screen!!!? Most folks in the 'know' say like 'Professional Crafters' would mearly use the spell that begins with....muggles,fumbles, embroils and baffels...ect As you can see I did subscribe to Sinsull's link and the things I have learned today are frankly mind blowingly wow. So needless to say...I now am in possesion of 'THE Secret'. Money well spent I can tell you. Cackle, hackle, horse and mackerel J |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 22 Jul 07 - 06:29 PM Remember if you go in for this I know many Wiccans who are still searching for a reliable Spellchecker!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 22 Jul 07 - 06:55 PM Thanks, UncleDaveO. That is a copy of the message I received. Don't know why the clicky won't work. Even stranger the message is gone from my email - not in the current messages or deleted messages. Must be witchcraft Wicked witchcraft Although I know It's strictly taboo When you arouse the need in me...etc. Looks like Alba needs a Spellcheck for her scared and sacred spell. Is she the "personal" tester? I have visions of Betty Crocker's test kitchen with a number of Stepford Wives arguing over boiling cauldrons. "No! No newts! I added newts earlier! Now we need some bread to soak up the extra or it will be too salty." Actually, the idea of katlaughing and Alba sharing spells with me is a bit scary. "Abracadabra and you're a frog!" shouted at Gerard Depardieu. I will go sit in the corner now and write an apology to the French. Since the night I called Baby Fred and a skunk came running to the door I summon nothing and certainly not demons. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 22 Jul 07 - 08:23 PM The thought of you three "making spells"( should be weaving spells!) leaves me feeling downright sacred, Mary!!! On a different note the whole Witches speech (see below) It has been suggested is actually a mnemonic for the REAL ingredients!!of the spell and that old Bill may have in fact known some authentic witches Round about the couldron go: In the poisones entrails throw. Toad,that under cold stone Days and nights has thirty-one Sweated venom sleeping got, Boil thou first in the charmed pot. Double,double toil and trouble; Fire burn and cauldron bubble. Fillet of a fenny snake, In the cauldron boil and bake; Eye of newt and toe of frog, Wool of bat and tongue of dog, Adder's fork and blindworm's sting, Lizard's leg and howlet's wing. For charm of powerful trouble, Like a hell-broth boil and bubble. Double,double toil and trouble; Fire burn and couldron bubble. Scale of dragon,tooth of wolf, Witch's mummy, maw and gulf Of the ravin'd salt-sea shark, Root of hemlock digg'd in the dark, Liver of blaspheming Jew; Gall of goat; andslips of yew silver'd in the moon's eclipse; Nose of Turk, and Tartar's lips; Finger of birth-strangled babe Ditch-deliver'd by the drab,- Make the gruel thick and slab: Add thereto a tiger's chaudron, For ingrediants of our cauldron. Double,double toil and trouble Fire burn and cauldron bubble., |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 22 Jul 07 - 09:10 PM Tell you something for nothing Micca (nice to see you ma dear) That is most definetly the last time I extract a Wolf's tooth in my Kitchen. To say that the Wolf was 'less than cooperative' would be an understatement. I mean I only required ONE tooth and he had plenty other teeth! So now I am off to apply some wart removal tincture to my..well nose warts of course and then it's back to my bubbling brew. Toodle-oo- |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alice Date: 22 Jul 07 - 10:15 PM ROSES BLUE © 1968 & 1974 Siquomb Publishing Corp. By Joni Mitchell I think of tears, I think of rain on shingles; I think of rain, I think of roses blue. I think of Rose, My heart begins to tremble, To see the place she's lately gotten to, Gotten to. She's gotten to mysterious devotions, She's gotten to the zodiac and zen, She's gotten into tarot cards and potions, She's laying her religion on her friends, On her friends. Friends who come to ask her for their future, Friends who come to find they can't be friends, Because of signs and seasons that don't suit her, She'll prophesy your death, she won't say when, Won't say when. When all the black cards come you cannot barter, When all your stars are stacked you cannot win, She'll shake her head and treat you like a martyr, It is her blackest spell she puts you in, Puts you in. In sorrow she can lure you where she wants you, Inside your own self pity there you swim, In sinking down to drown her voice still haunts you, And only with your laughter can you win, Can you win. You think of tears, I think of rain on shingles, I think of rain, I think of Roses blue, I think of Rose, my heart begins to tremble, To see the place she's lately gotten to, Gotten to. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 22 Jul 07 - 10:37 PM I don't know, Micca. I don't recall any of that being covered in the Harry Potter books. And where the hell did they get dragon scales? But Jacqui and I each found an authentic witch's broomstick. Jacqui's goes "Bruhmmm Bruhmmmm". So maybe we'll go off for a ride and check in later. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 23 Jul 07 - 12:58 AM Well, at least they weren't calling for "sugar and spice" or "puppy dogs' tails!" Eeewwwww!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 23 Jul 07 - 01:45 AM SINS, you guys are so passé, Modern witches ride Dysons!!!! See here |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Liz the Squeak Date: 23 Jul 07 - 04:09 AM Huh... Dysons are no good, bits keep breaking. After 2 1/2 years the bit that holds the nozzles on will fall apart and the coil retract won't work. Besides... you need one hell of a long extension lead to go any distance. LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 23 Jul 07 - 05:29 AM Its Magick, Liz, parts only break off if you insist on CLEANING with it anyway We dont need no steenking electrickery!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: jacqui.c Date: 23 Jul 07 - 06:41 AM But the brooms are so much quieter - we can sneak up unheard and scare the bejaysus out of people whenever we want to. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 23 Jul 07 - 11:01 AM Eh Alba? How much was that subscription? Alba? Alba? Have we lost her? Damn! Now one of us will have to subscribe to figure out how to get her back. Is Burt's credit card good outside the Inn? Do you think she is in any danger? Anyone willing to split the cost of a subscription? They do promise two guaranteed spells - you can even choose first. Micca you seem to know the most about this - if Alba has somehow contaminated her brew with that wart removal tincture, what might she have done? Made herself invisible, maybe? Created a hole righht through the center of the earth? (Not a bad idea if it takes Boston with her). Sorry Alba. That was mean. Micca? What should we do? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 23 Jul 07 - 12:59 PM SINS, Alba is a damned sight safer in this stuff than you or I, she is probably in a "no signal" zone!!!(even witches are victims of Modern technology) maybe the "Wart removal" stuff now removes a different kind of Wart? As a general rule Casting spells is to be avoided (and is by all right thinking and ethical witches) as the "Threefold" rule applies( anything you do comes back to you, Threefold) and if you send out nasties, well, it might just boomerang and bite you in the ass!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 23 Jul 07 - 02:42 PM Did someone mention 'Ass' mmmm nice *grin* Well dang that was interesting little field trip. No Dyson for me I'm afraid. I still spend my nights flying around on my 19 year old Rainbow Vac! (talking ass, you would think that Rainbow could have put the carry handle somewhere else huh!). No prob with the wart tinc though Warts have gone but have been replaced by hair, which is an improvement ...of sorts. The one tooth less wolf came back to my door around 10pm with a couple of buddies but what with me being the shy sort I didn't answer the door. They think I give out free dental work now! Then I was casting all night! (Got a job hiring extras for 'The Witches of Eastwick -return of Jack') Now Sins don't say I didn't tell you. Hannaford's has a special on Dragon Scale today. Thing is they don't freeze well so you would have to get your Brew brewing asap! The brew would keep till August 11th making your next House Concert...eh...what shall I say... very different from all the other Concerts you have hosted. *wink* Mary... I'll give you the two starter spells I got from my subscription to the email thing. Free. (Truth is we don't need their stinkin spells) The first so called "spell" is a tad boring, you know the type. Standard fare for the wanna-be. Turning your enemies into Newts. yawn The good thing about having a load of Newts around the House though is that you can scoop the eyes out of the them and use them in your brew and the extra eyes you have left over do freeze in a zip lock bag (Hannafords rarely have any eye of Newt in stock as well you know)) I am still thinking about the second spell that I was given for my subcription...sounds very dodgy to me and when I have decided what to do with it (use it or lose it if you catch my drift) I will let you know what it involves and you can decide for yourself. You'lle see what I mean when I post again. Unfortunately Boston is still here. Although the "Big Dig" has taken care of most of it....very little left to do there in the way of making it disappear.....*Big Grin* Micca you are a wise man indeed. How true is the truth. It is indeed best not to throw/cast nasty stuff in any direction for any reason what so ever as it WILL find it's way back to those that would cast the 'original' nasty over and over and over again. Increasing in nastiness with each return trip and if one has cast Horse shit...well you get the picture. Now if you will excuse me I have to figure out how to remove the Gall from a Goat. Micca, I have never seen a pair of Lips on Tartar sauce in all my Life. Is this something that is available in your local Sainsburys? "come here Goat, I hear your bloody bell, here goatee goatee... Rumble, jungle, feckin mumble....." J |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 23 Jul 07 - 03:22 PM Is a newt anything like a geccko? I always suspected that nasty little GEICO spokesperson was the result of a nasty with a witch with a sense of humor. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 23 Jul 07 - 03:42 PM According to a certain Wellknown sage(and onion) the change to Dysons etc. came about because the "standard" broom tends to emulate the back string of a thong and can be very uncomfortable especially when doing rapid mid air manoeuvres, whereas the Dyson and other more "wide bodied" devices stay grounded on the external cheeks. AAlba, I'm afraid when purchasing such devices It is vital to note the position of carrying handles and other fittings that might be uncomfortable in flight, A well fitted safety belt is also a wise precaution!!1 |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 23 Jul 07 - 08:42 PM After careful consideration I have decided to invest in a magic carpet. The roll up kind so Alice isn't tempted to pee on it. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 23 Jul 07 - 08:43 PM After thought: it will be handy to have a number of friends riding about on vacuum cleaners. Never know when the carpet might need a going over. SINS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: frogprince Date: 23 Jul 07 - 09:53 PM Away Ye Merry Lasses (Crowwomen - on their debut album "Crow Goddess") c. Georje Holper I told me Mum I was going out, she asked what I was all about I asked if I could take the broom, I'm going to meet the girls Oh, the moon is wax tonight and don't you like the fellas? I prefer the girls tonight, I'm going to ride the wind chorus: 'Cause it's the girls' night out, away ye merry lasses Get your brooms, get 'em out, we'll ride the wind tonight Oh, it's the girls' night out, away ye merry lasses Get your brooms, get 'em out, we'll ride the wind tonight My sister is so bold and free, she asked if she could come with me I saw her up above the trees, a-goin' to ride the wind Oh, the moon is wax tonight and don't you like the fellas? I prefer the girls tonight, I'm going to ride the wind Chorus As we were goin' out the gate we met our dear old mother Ridin' a broom and hummin' a tune, goin' to ride the wind Oh, the moon is wax tonight and don't you like the fellas? I prefer the girls tonight, I'm going to ride the wind Chorus |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 24 Jul 07 - 12:37 AM Love that song!! Sins...I don't "hoover" for anyone!**bg** |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 24 Jul 07 - 09:32 AM Surely you meant hover Kraft, sorry hover Kat! *smile* Those in the know, know that one of the lesser known secrets of the Kraft is a total aversion to Domesticity, after all why wear one's self out with domestic duties when you can pull a Mary Poppins on your Housework!. Simple enough wee spell as well: In ev'ry job that must be done There is an element of fun You find the fun and snap! The job's a game And ev'ry task you undertake Becomes a piece of cake A lark! A spree! It's very clear to see that A Spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down The medicine go down The medicine go down Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down In a most delightful way *note to self, check if it is Slap or Snap * Use it all the time myself. Haven't dusted, done Laundry, baked or vaccumed a rug for years by hand. Just chanted the 'SOS spell' and...Hey Pesto ~ job done. Tried the second free spell last night.....now this one is well dodgy. Still trying to undo it. Will check back later with details........ J <[:>0 ~ ancient secret symbol |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 24 Jul 07 - 10:39 AM " Rule 2 in the "Witches handbook" " do not summon anything you can not dismiss(and in any case, anything bigger than your head)or start a spell you can not undo or reverse"!!!!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: beardedbruce Date: 24 Jul 07 - 10:51 AM re broomsticks. broomsticks are usually pictured incorectly being used as flying aids. In traditional ( ie, pre-Wicca) practice, the brrom was mounted with the straw IN FRONT of the person, and a candle places in it and lit. Not exactly OSHA standard for fire safety. The early texts (Farmer at al) discuss the use of the broomstick as a means to apply unguents to the privat parts. These were supposedly made ( the unguents) with materials that would induce hallucinogens, giving the user the feeling of flying. So, a Dyson would not be of much use. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: beardedbruce Date: 24 Jul 07 - 10:54 AM see also "Cows, Pigs, Witches, and Wars :the Riddle of Culture" by Marvin Harris |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 24 Jul 07 - 10:58 AM Alba, That spoonful of sugar made me gag and my breakfast came up. Anyone have a WetVac? Then I lit a broom as Bruce suggested. SIGH. Damn thing is made of plastic. It melted and set off the smoke alarm. Another spell I can't seem to undo or reverse. The broom no longer hovers so I can't turn off the alarm. Micca, Where can I get a copy of that Rule Book? SINS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: TheSnail Date: 24 Jul 07 - 11:04 AM So, a Dyson would not be of much use. But a Hoover Dustette ... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: beardedbruce Date: 24 Jul 07 - 11:06 AM SINS, One lights the candle ( with the appropriate spell). But NOW you need a bunch of FAA certifications and EPA/OSHA/FTC/DOT permits- far more difficult to get than the unguent ingredients. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Tinker Date: 24 Jul 07 - 11:18 AM Now did I have to open this on a housecleaning day.....????!!!! I've been using both the broom and the vacumn all morning and it's time to light a candle, but .... I really need to know not how the vacumn "happened" to be turnt on but how the body parts were in the way .... As I told my church kids when they asked for a misssion trip in Amsterdam.... ALBA !!! NOw I'm humming that song, and I'm already cleaning, and I may have to think of a suitable energy to send back at you for this one... UGH!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Amos Date: 24 Jul 07 - 11:21 AM The late, lamented "Nimbus" electric broom toy had it all, folks. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: beardedbruce Date: 24 Jul 07 - 11:23 AM TheSnail Witches are female. Warlocks are male. Suposedly Should we get into wizards and sorcerers, magicians, necromancers, et al? warlock ( ) n. A male witch, sorcerer, wizard, or demon witch [ wich ] noun (plural witch·es) Definition: 1. somebody with alleged magic powers: somebody, especially a woman, who is supposed to have magical or wonder-working powers that are most often used malevolently 2. follower of nature religion: a follower of Wicca, a pre-Christian natural religion 3. offensive term: an offensive term that deliberately insults a woman regarded as ugly, vicious, or malicious ( insult ) 4. seductive woman: a woman who is regarded as alluring or seductive ( informal ) ( sometimes offensive) Dansk (Danish) n. - troldmand Nederlands (Dutch) tovenaar Français (French) n. - sorcier Deutsch (German) n. - Zauberer Ελληνική (Greek) n. - μάγος, γητευτής Italiano (Italian) stregone Português (Portuguese) n. - feiticeiro (m), mágico (m), bruxo (m) Русский (Russian) колдун, чародей, волшебник Español (Spanish) n. - hechicero, brujo Svenska (Swedish) n. - trollkarl, svartkonstnär, häxmästare 中文（简体） (Chinese (Simplified)) 男巫士, 魔术师 中文（繁體） (Chinese (Traditional)) n. - 男巫士, 魔術師 한국어 (Korean) n. - 마법사, 마술사 日本語 (Japanese) n. - 魔法使い, 魔術師 العربيه (Arabic) (الاسم) ألمشعوذ, ألساحر עברית (Hebrew) n. - מכשף, קוסם, רב-מג |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 24 Jul 07 - 11:49 AM Bruce I very strongly advise you not to address any British Witches you may meet as " Warlocks" ( unless you WANT to spend the next year or two in a cool damp environment saying "Ribbit")it is widely regarded as a derogatory term.It is regarded as being a "literary artifice" at best by many and as a load of ***locks by others. Witches is a "non-gender specific" term in Modern Witchcraft. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: beardedbruce Date: 24 Jul 07 - 11:56 AM I have faith that the Threefold Rule will protect me from those who might have the ability to do something to me, and that those not aware of that rule will only get what they deserve. Many of those I know here prefer the word "Wiccan" to either term. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 24 Jul 07 - 12:40 PM Q. How many witches does it take to change a lightbulb? A, Into what? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 24 Jul 07 - 01:28 PM Jacqui has a Nimbus 2000. Goes BRMMMM BRMMMMM. Mine is a prop is from a costume store and site quietly in the corner. Now Micca - Which witch are you? Are you a good witch or a bad witch? The Munchkins want to know. Anyone else have an adverse reaction to picturing Tinker cleaning her house and humming "A Spoonful Of Sugar"? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: beardedbruce Date: 24 Jul 07 - 01:33 PM DOes she collect or scatter "fairie dust"? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: GUEST,leeneia Date: 24 Jul 07 - 03:52 PM Somebody posting above wrote about a "rye smile." Was this what you were thinking of? When Linnda Caporael began nosing into the Salem witch trials as a college student in the early 1970s, she had no idea that a common grain fungus might be responsible for the terrible events of 1692. But then the pieces began to fall into place. Caporael, now a behavioral psychologist at New York's Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, soon noticed a link between the strange symptoms reported by Salem's accusers, chiefly eight young women, and the hallucinogenic effects of drugs like LSD. LSD is a derivative of ergot, a fungus that affects rye grain. Ergotism — ergot poisoning — had indeed been implicated in other outbreaks of bizarre behavior, such as the one that afflicted the small French town of Pont-Saint-Esprit in 1951 from http://www.hbci.com/~wenonah/history/ergot.htm. Interesting site! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: beardedbruce Date: 24 Jul 07 - 03:53 PM Cogito ERGOT sum 50! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 24 Jul 07 - 07:34 PM Thanks for the info Leeneia..LOL. What a bloody day. The 2nd free spell is a doozee. Do not try this at Home or in the Park or at the Bus Stop or in your car. It is a spell called the BBB special. (what the heck is that I hear some of you say!!?) Let me take you back, way back, to last night. After my Tea I thought ah feck it, let's give this freebie spell a spin and see if it can fly. So I followed the instructions in my email and wampamaloompa! There it was, floating in front of me. The one, the only (and the rather large I might add)..... BumperBlissBubble. It was a wonderous sight as it went floating around my sitting room. After what seemed like oh, 10 seconds or so, the beautiful bubble descended from the ceiling and settled over my head and slowly wrapped it's bubbley stuff around me till I was , for all intents and purposes, trapped inside it's blissfullness. Immediately a feeling of rapture came over me. Very nice says I. Oh everything seemed so well... bloody blissfull, like floating on Cloud Nine. ( although I must admit that I have only experienced Cloud 5 so far but I imagine this is what like Cloud 9 might be like) My telephone rang. I answered it. Jane Doe (name changed to protect the innocent) my friend,was calling me to tell me about an verbal disagreement she had just had with her new close "friend". She was very upset. Me. I couldn't have given a rat's arse about how she might be feeling. I was in seventh heaven. I was so wrapped up in the Bliss Bubble that eventually poor Jane just hung up on me. Now over a period of say an hour my telephone rang 4 or 5 times. These calls being from People I know well and who are, or have been. going through that most Human of all experiences... Life and all that goes with it. Did I care? Did I feck. There I was sitting in my Bliss Bubble. Strange thing though, as the power of the spell wained I found that being Blissed out ain't all it's cracked to be. I was looking at the TV and the News was on and thought, huh, I don't care, but you know what. I did really. Just as well blissfullness/rapture/ecstacy ect are mearly temporary feelings I can tell you. I have decided not to post the 2nd freebee spell Mary. You don't need this stinkin spell, none of us do. I like Life, warts and all (well hair now actually since I used that weird tincture but you can shave hair off unlike warts ~ ouch!) So you will all be (well some of you will be) happy to know that I am back to my old slightly abnormal self. To those that have been damaged during the time I was under the influence of this freebee spell I offer my sincere apologies...oh and I miss you Jane Doe (you know who you are). Call me..Pleeze...Pretty Pleeze. soggy slippers, spider's flippers Jude Micca. I had an little incident while removing the lips from a Tartar this afternoon. He is not happy. Any Ideas? Tinker...don't hurt me......think Bon Jovi and the SOS song will leave your head faster than you can say..Livin on a prayer *grin*. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 24 Jul 07 - 10:03 PM So Alba's been dropping acid? She's holding out on us. Spill the beans, Alba or we will join on our own. I want the spells and the secret code ring and the badge. Rules from Micca. Phony spells from Alba. Bippity-boppity-boo!!!! from Disney. I have watched every single idiotic episode of Charmed and not a single usable spell. Theirs are all mediocre dactylic hexameter. Half the time they don't rhyme or work. Harry Potter's latest book is missing the Spell pages. It's a plot. HMMMM Jane Doe seems to have a more interesting life than any of us. Can I have her phone number? SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: GUEST,Jane Doe Date: 25 Jul 07 - 12:07 AM Oh, sure! Now, ya want my phone number and what? You all are gonna weave the 2nd bloody spell and where will that leave me, I ask you...looking for the walls of Jericho to come tumbin' down, I tell you what...Alba, don't you DARE give that solgarned, I mean dolgarned spell out to innybody or I WILL brush up on my Deepest, Darkest Best Friend's Secrets Revealed Spell and they'll know about a lot more than just your warts, you just wait and see! Walks off mumbling"...fecking spider's flippers...what the feck is that!?" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 25 Jul 07 - 04:39 AM Sins, Rule one is real easy, until you think about it " And it harm NO ONE, do what you will" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: GUEST,leeneia Date: 25 Jul 07 - 10:04 AM Alba, was there a very skinny, particularly stinky cigarette inside that blissful bubble? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: GUEST,Green Man Date: 25 Jul 07 - 10:28 AM Before Gardner the only rule was 'Do what thou will be the whole of the law' The rule of three is a sop to make 'muggles' sleep easier. They think we can't get away with anything really nasty that way. The old meaning of Warlock is 'Breaker of oaths.' so yes its an insult to an old one. GM |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 25 Jul 07 - 10:52 AM Just a thought...we have Mudcatters all over the world. If we all performed the spell at the same time in carefully planned locations might we not envelope the world in good will and end all warfare and unhappiness? Or would everyone just not notice? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 25 Jul 07 - 10:54 AM He thought he saw a Garden-door That opened with a key: He looked again, and found it was A double Rule of Three: "And all its mystery," he said, "Is clear as day to me." Do unto others has been around a long time in some form or another...can't see the harm in following it... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 25 Jul 07 - 11:08 AM Then there is Rule 3 " Know Thyself" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 25 Jul 07 - 11:08 AM Actually, Greenman has a point. Search witchcraft on the internet and you'll find one "authority" who traces it back to the Bronze Age. Another proclaims that witchcraft started with the Celts. Can any coven today trace its roots back more than ten generations? And who made the rules? When did the Rule of Three come into acceptance and why and by whom? Who formalized the ceremonies? What got left out in the process? What were the Christian influences? As with all modern belief systems, witchcraft has evolved. Just imagine the nonsense that little girls who watch and believe Charmed are practicing and passing on. Imagine the influence Harry Potter is having on the Craft. Then remember what started this thread. A company who sells everything from face creams to fishing rods is offering membership in a Witchcraft Club with two free spells as a come on. By the way, Alba, I want those spells! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 25 Jul 07 - 11:10 AM I personally wouldn't want to risk the outcome by going against the Oath Kat and I ain't that brave (or should that read stupid?) enough to try ignoring 'Harm Thee None' to see what happens either.....eeeeeek! You know Sins I think you are onto something. Maybe not a Univeral "bliss" spell, as that would only be an artifical very temporary state. What is needed is something lasting. MMMM...now THAT is something to think about today. I am going to check into courses available at the OPU this afternoon. More later. fiddles, riddles, puppies piddles J Leeneia...eh no to the stinky cigarette...(just pure and simple...(very simple actually) free online Magick...with a drop of Scottish nutter essence added! *BG* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 25 Jul 07 - 12:16 PM Ok. Who stole my 'S' from Universal huh? Own up. Come on. You know I know who you are! Now this is the kind of thing that leads to all sorts of probs. It is not called SPELL-ing for nothing you know! Boils, bunions, liver and Onions J |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 25 Jul 07 - 02:35 PM Sorry - I was playing Querty on POGO and needed and S. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Big Al Whittle Date: 25 Jul 07 - 02:43 PM I think it very sound in principle - ladies dancing round in the nud - I'm in favour of it having a higher profile. In fact my back garden's free. Just a few photos for the scrapbook, no funny business..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: akenaton Date: 25 Jul 07 - 04:14 PM "Essence of Scottish nutters" eh Judie sounds powerful stuff...you watch ye dont get yer wee fingers burnt handlin' it. Huv ye goat ony spells wi' fruit pastilles and nippy sweeties in them Missus....Ah need somethin' tae frichten awaw the midgies...like. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 25 Jul 07 - 04:24 PM Dancing around in the nud? What is a nud? Will it cut my feet? Is it poisonous? Don't want a rash on my...anywhere. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: TheSnail Date: 25 Jul 07 - 06:31 PM I think he meant mud. (But I could be wrong.) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Liz the Squeak Date: 25 Jul 07 - 06:41 PM or nuddy... nude. LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: TheSnail Date: 25 Jul 07 - 06:47 PM Oh, I ever thought of that. Isn't the Wicca term for that "Sky clad"? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 25 Jul 07 - 10:05 PM There is a show about hauntings on SciFi tonight. This woman was making a pentagram of holy water and sea salt when she was lifted off the ground by an unseen something. Pentagram of holy water? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 25 Jul 07 - 10:12 PM Oh, Sins, I think ya heard it wrong...it's Pentagon of Holy Water...I shouldnae tell it, but the vial of Holy Water is said to be the "essence" of shrub, straight from the loo at the White House. Those Pentagon witches are weird folks! I heard something about a Pishing Down spell, even! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: GUEST,leeneia Date: 26 Jul 07 - 10:41 AM Here is an actual spell which I have tried, and it works. SPELL |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 26 Jul 07 - 10:50 AM WOW Leenia. I tried it and it does work. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: GUEST,leeneia Date: 26 Jul 07 - 01:23 PM Already!? Magic is so wonderful. Alba, glad to hear that no stinky cigarettes were involved. Where can I get some of that Scottish nutter essence you spoke of? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 26 Jul 07 - 02:29 PM leeneia,It is usually freely available on Sauchiehall St and through out Glesga after the pubs shut I believe the "Sara Heid" is a prime source!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 27 Jul 07 - 09:34 AM Is it legal to have this stuff as long as it is for "religious" purposes? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Alba Date: 27 Jul 07 - 10:32 AM Good Question Mary...! One that could lead to the opening of a big can of wormees which I refuse to get the can opener out for..lol Micca is correct about one of the source's where the "essence" can be found but that would be Black Market Essence of Scottish Nutter, bloody potent stuff and let me tell you there is no better place to find the most powerful of this essence than at the Saracen Head Pub in Glasgow (or as the locals call it 'The Sarry Heid' pub). There is a lady that lives in the pub. She is called Maggie. She has been there for oh, a few hundred years (even moving location with the pub)..Maggie will put your right on the 'Essence'... Now what with it being Friday, I have a few things to do. I shall however return later this evening with some news from the OPU and the info on the fall courses available. Eh, I tried the 'Spell' spell Leeneia, but maybe my dizzylexia posed a problem...my Horse has turned into a Weasel. Any ideas on reversal! Dancing, Dumplings, Flouncing and grumblings J |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 27 Jul 07 - 11:48 AM Dumplings and grumblings don't rhyme. No wonder the SPELLing spell didn't work for you. Weasel back to horse: First, Drop L; Then drop E so it Changes WEASE to WEAS Change WEAS to WOES Add back E Change WOESE to WORSE Change WORSE to HORSE. Unless, of course, you want a horse of a different colr. That is covered in the Advanced Course. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 27 Jul 07 - 11:49 AM That's "Horse of a different COLOR." I hiccupped while saying the SPELL. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Big Al Whittle Date: 27 Jul 07 - 12:21 PM Do Penn and Teller know about this stuff? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: TheSnail Date: 27 Jul 07 - 12:32 PM "Horse of a different COLOR." There you are. Americans can't even SPELL "COLOUR". |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 27 Jul 07 - 01:09 PM Alba Thats the problem, are you spelling in American or in English, (or Glasga for that matter) they could create significant differences in outcome!! eye of toe and bat of wom something wiccan this way come |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 27 Jul 07 - 01:13 PM Like for instance are you using a "shanty" or a "chantey"? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: MMario Date: 27 Jul 07 - 01:29 PM or even a chanty |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Tinker Date: 27 Jul 07 - 06:56 PM So if I work to a Shanty (or chantey) (0r chanty) the end result will be different than if I work to the "song which shall not be named again" --- My kids may kill me if Mary Poppins is heard in the house again--- Okay at least my mental health will be stronger... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 27 Jul 07 - 07:08 PM Tink a "Shanty" is a sailors work song A Chantey(in Glasgow) is a porcelain vessle of old that went under the bed for "Night use" in houses where the privy was out back!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 27 Jul 07 - 08:01 PM No wonder I have been having trouble getting these spells to work. No one told me that I needed accompaniment. So, do I use New Age, Rap, Heavy Metal? What? The Can Can from Orpheus in the Underworld made the pot boil over. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Amos Date: 27 Jul 07 - 08:11 PM You Glaswegians!! Out here those are called "thunder jugs" for reasons lost in the odiforous mists of time. Gardez-l'eau!! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 27 Jul 07 - 08:45 PM off'n off bucket in NY State - half mine and half the old lady's Store a she crab in it and now we have a music thread. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Tinker Date: 27 Jul 07 - 08:59 PM TheFreeDictionary Noun 1. chantey - a rhythmical work song originally sung by sailors Noun 1. chanty - a rhythmical work song originally sung by sailors Noun 2. shanty - a rhythmical work song originally sung by sailors Noun 1. shanty - small crude shelter used as a dwelling Now there seems to be some sort of power of three working about this and at the moment everything but the small seems to apply .... Now if I could find the missing piece that causes all things to return to order and neatness.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 28 Jul 07 - 12:47 AM Sins, just stay away from singing That Old Black Magic! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 28 Jul 07 - 05:27 AM Ah, Kat, as you well know Magic is colourless, there is No "White" or "Black" Magic it is the INTENT of the practitioner that gives it "colour" and focus the return point for the "Rule of 3" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Big Al Whittle Date: 28 Jul 07 - 07:43 AM say it once and say it loud! I like to get naked and I'm gregarious! my intentions are black and extremely nefarious! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 28 Jul 07 - 09:37 AM Miccadarlin'...my tongue was firmly in my cheek.:-) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 28 Jul 07 - 12:08 PM With MY tongue in a similar position, the lyrics Couls Be read as describing ingesting a Halucinogenic, such as Amanita, Peyote or datura, or even Ergot!!! "That Old Black Magic" That old black magic has me in its spell, that old black magic that you weave so well. Those icy fingers up and down my spine That same old witchcraft when your eyes meet mine. The same old tingle that I feel inside, and then that elevator starts its ride And down and down I go, round and round I go, like a leaf that's caught in the tide. I should stay away, but what can I do? I hear your name and I'm aflame Aflame with such a burning desire that only your kiss can put out the fire. For you're the lover I have waited for, the mate that fate had me created for. And every time your lips meet mine, darling, down and down I go, round and round I go In a spin, loving the spin I'm in, under that old black magic called love. Music Harold Arlen, lyrics Johnny Mercer |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 28 Jul 07 - 05:41 PM Well, the ORIGINAL did look a bit like a visit from a Little People near the end. (Warning, youtube video link.) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 29 Jul 07 - 01:16 PM "Oh it's witchcraft Wicked witchcraft Although I know It's strictly taboo When you arouse the need in me My heart says 'Yes Indeed' in me Proceed with what you're leading me to" Serious question: If you had to choose between Glinda, the Good Witch of the North and the Wicked Witch of the West, who apparently had no name, which would be your companion? It would take me all of three minutes to get annoyed enough at the smarmy Glinda to bitch-slap her back to Munchkin Land. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: GUEST,Peter Woodruff Date: 29 Jul 07 - 06:19 PM Dennis Kucinich introduced the 333 spell back in April...but it is taking a long time to work. Peter |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 31 Jul 07 - 12:02 PM A thread on withcraft and not one mention of Samantha or Endora? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 31 Jul 07 - 12:07 PM 100 Witches Meet and Greet: http://witches.meetup.com/about/ Wonder why the US is the most popular destination? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Micca Date: 31 Jul 07 - 12:40 PM Sins, They are ONLY Pretend "witches" thats why they dont get a mention, curiously enough the (somewhat derogatory) name among some UK witches for "pretend" witches is also derived from another TV show. This name is applied phoneys and to the very earnest young people who learn their "craft" from TV shows like "Charmed" and from equally fantasy laden books etc rather than have the discipline and dedication to train properly for the required time is "Buffys" as in "Buffy the Fluffy Bunny Pagan". |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: MMario Date: 31 Jul 07 - 12:53 PM What? Micca, you mean the movie ***lied*** when they told us Samantha and Endora were real? Sins- Glinda was a Good Sorceress (though due to the movies often referred to as the good witch)- and lived in the Quadling country - which is north (down) on the map of Oz. And while pretty sickeningly sweet in the books, nowhere near as sacherine as the movie version. The witch Mombi that bespelled Ozma into the boy Tip lived in the Gillikin country (South, significant coolour purple) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Big Al Whittle Date: 01 Aug 07 - 08:28 AM Well I think it sounds exciting - drinking from goblets, dancing round altars of blood - stark naked, signs of the pentagram, and circles where the devil can't get you, and horned deities..... how come I never get to folk clubs like that....? just some old twat singing bloody folksongs.....heres one off Bob Dylan's first album....complete bollocks, if you ask me. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 01 Aug 07 - 11:56 AM wee drummer, Stay away from folk clubs. They are collapsing (see the appropriate thread) and you could get hurt. Follow the link to the Witches Meet and Greet in my previous post and you are sure to find a genuine coven complete with naked womaen and cups of blood. Unfortunately (or maybe not) most will be under the age of thirteen and talk in silly rhymes. Most will also be brewing potions to combat acne and the blond down the street. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: Tinker Date: 01 Aug 07 - 09:33 PM Old Witchcraft Secrets Oh my Buffy stand back --- I think this was the site the original letter linked to.... The world at your feet for only $27.00 -- Free Gift #1: "Candle Magick" (worth $37.00) Free Gift #2: "Self Hypnosis and Meditation Practical-HandBook" (value: $67.00) Free Gift #3: "Home Guide for Potions, Brews and Incenses" (valued $47.00) Plus the "Magick Encyclopedia" Special and limited offer $27 for only 192 people. And an 8 week money back guaruntee that the world will be at your feet -- money, love, health, psychic protection it's all included for just one low price.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: katlaughing Date: 02 Aug 07 - 12:11 AM Jeepers and Jehosophat! That website is something else! Did you read their "earnings disclaimer" page?! It's sites like that wot give us all a bad name.**bg** |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: frogprince Date: 02 Aug 07 - 12:18 AM Ye Gads, the pagan's answer to Pat Robertson! and somebody out there will actually fall for it. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 02 Aug 07 - 05:53 PM 87% of poltergist activity occurs around adult women? HHHMMMMMM. Let's have a contest to see who can document the most misspellings and grammatical errors. I'll see if I can get the book on eBay for half price, if anyone wants it. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Secrets of Witchcraft From: SINSULL Date: 02 Aug 07 - 05:57 PM This is the company's info: Platinum International Sucess Industries, Inc. U12 Gamma Commercial Complex, CBD Subic Bay Metropolitan Authority Subic Bay Freeport, Olongapo City Philippines The catch is that they are offering sucess not success. Save your money. This is not the real deal. |