Lyr Add: Chantey of the Cook

Subject: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: GUEST,Q
Date: 22 Feb 03 - 03:30 PM

Lyr. Add: THE CHANTEY OF THE COOK
Harry Kemp

(Dithyramb of a discontented crew)
The Devil take the cook, that old grey-bearded fellow,
Yo ho, haul away!
Who feeds us odds and ends and biscuits whiskered yellow,
(And the home port's a thousand miles away.)

The Devil take the cook, that dirty old duffer,
Yo ho, haul away!
Each day he makes the captain fatter and bluffer,
(But we'll have to eat hardtack for many a day.)
The ship-biscuits moldy and the spuds we get are rotten,
Yo ho. hail away!
And the tinned goods that's dished up is seven years forgotten,
Yo ho, haul away!
And each, in his heart, has marked the cook for slaughter,
(And it won't do him any good to pray).
For the coffee's only chickory half-soaked in luke-warm water,
Yo ho, haul away!
It's put on your best duds and join the delegation;
Yo ho, haul away!
We're aft to ask the captain for a decent ration,
(And to drop the cook at Botany Bay...)
Look here, you cabin boy, what has set you laughin'?
Yo ho, haul away!
Don't tell us no lies or we'll clout your ears for chafin'
For we're not a lot of horses that can live on hay.
What's this you're tellin'! Is it plum duff and puddin'?
Yo ho, haul!
Why not make it roast beef an' let it be a good 'un?
For plum duff and rum's not a feast for every day.
Oh, it ain't the cook's fault that we eat one day in seven.
Yo ho, haul away!
It's the owners of the ship- may they never get to heaven
(No matter how hard they pray).
It's the owners of the ship that give us meat that's yellow,
Yo ho, haul away!
And after all the cook's a mighty decent fellow
(Though we'll have to eat rotten grub for many a day).
O Lord up in heaven, when their souls and bodies sever,
Yo ho, haul away!
May the owners squat in Hell gnawing at salt-horse forever
And the grub that they give us every day...
Excepting for one thing, oh Lord God in heaven,
Yo ho, haul away!
Don't let them have no plum duff one day in seven,
(All together, with great vigor !)
But forever and forever and unto eternity the truck that
we're fed every day. Amen!

Found this sailor doggerel while looking for material about cow camp coosies and biscuit-shooters. Maybe Charlie Noble can refine it, if he gets away from the grog he's ladling out today.
Harry Kemp, tramp poet and sometime sailor, NYC, 1938-1939. Found at American Memory, WPA interviews.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: Charley Noble
Date: 22 Feb 03 - 03:46 PM

Guest Q-

Well, that's a rant that gives me something to chew over.

Did you ever hear the one about the two sailors who were trying to choose which sea biscuit to eat next? Well, they selected a couple, banging them on the table top, and from each one was shaken out a weevil. One sailor grinned and said "That's the one I want!" and when asked why he replied "Because it had the lessor of the two weevils!"

Back to me grog,
Charley Noble

Subject: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: Charley Noble
Date: 22 Feb 03 - 04:23 PM

Here's some initial tweaking for singing. A lot is lost by making the last line the same (except for the final rant) but the chorus crew will appreciate that change:

By Harry Kemp, tramp poet and sometime sailor, NYC, 1938-1939.
Found at American Memory, WPA interviews.

THE CHANTEY OF THE COOK-2


The Devil take the cook, that old grey-bearded fellow,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
Who feeds us odds and ends and biscuits whiskered yellow,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

The Devil take the cook, that dirty old duffer,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!!
Each day he makes the captain fatter and bluffer,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

The ship-biscuits moldy and the spuds we get are rotten,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
And the tinned goods that's dished up is seven years forgotten,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

And each, in his heart, has marked the cook for slaughter,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!!
For the coffee's only chickory half-soaked in luke-warm water,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

It's put on your best duds and join the delegation;
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
We're aft to ask the captain for a decent ration,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Look here, you cabin boy, what has set you laughin'?
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
Don't tell us no lies or we'll clout your ears for chafin'
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

What's this you're tellin'! Is it plum duff and puddin'?
Yo ho, haul 'im away!!
Why not make it roast beef an' let it be a good 'un?
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Oh, it ain't the cook's fault that we eat one day in seven.
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
It's the owners of the ship - may they never get to heaven,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

It's the owners of the ship that give us meat that's yellow,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!!
And after all, the cook's a mighty decent fellow,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

O Lord up in heaven, when their souls and bodies sever,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
May the owners squat in Hell, gnawing at salt-horse forever,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Excepting for one thing, oh Lord God in heaven,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
Don't let them have no plum duff, one day in seven,
But forever and forever and unto eternity the truck that
we're fed every day. Amen!


Thanks again, Guest Q, on behalf of Harry Kemp!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: GUEST,Q
Date: 22 Feb 03 - 04:33 PM

Very good, taking that simple last line and setting it for every verse.
One reason I posted the verses is that it is closer to the semi-literate complaints natural to a laboring man; not the polished poems we end up with in the books.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: Charley Noble
Date: 22 Feb 03 - 05:33 PM

That's why I hate to toss away all them last lines, but I may find some use for 'em yet!

Please send me an e-mail at [e-mail] so I can credit you properly in case my sea music group ever uses this.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: GUEST,Q
Date: 22 Feb 03 - 06:33 PM

I think I learned something today. Try and get the whole story!
I decided to read the biographical notes with the poems by Harry Kemp in the WPA interview at American Memory. Being familiar with a great number of these WPA biographies, all of common people who are known only through these interviews, I assumed that he was one of these people.
Harry Kemp was a published author and poet, known as the Tramp Poet, and The Poet of the Dunes, among other names. He wrote a number of chanteys, and a book of chanteys has his introduction.
He became a slave to alcohol sometime in the 1930s, was divorced, and lived on the largesse of those who had admired his work of earlier years. His work deteriorated and I don't believe anything from his last 20-odd years received any attention.
There are a number of websites devoted to his biography and his writings.
A fascinating story of a most unusual man, possibly the inspiration for Kerouac's famous novel, is found in these websites. In addition to the American Memory WPA interview, see these:
Poet of the Dunes
Poetry

Don't credit me with anything- just credit this unusual man. And look at some of his other sea songs.

Subject: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: Charley Noble
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 07:17 PM

Here's some more minor tweaking of Harry Kemp's rant. However, my major reason for doing another posting is I've found a traditional chantey tune that seems to work for singing it, "Huckleberry Hunting." This news won't necessarily help the general Mudcat singer but the sea music crowd will have little trouble tracking it down:

By Harry Kemp, tramp poet and sometime sailor, NYC, 1938-1939.
Found at American Memory, WPA interviews.
Adapted by Charles Ipcar 2004
Tune: traditional sea shanty "Huckleberry Hunting"

THE CHANTEY OF THE COOK-2


The Devil take the cook, that greasy-bearded fellow,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
Who feeds us odds and ends and biscuits whiskered yellow,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

The Devil take the cook, that dirty rotten duffer,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
Each day he makes the Captain fatter and bluffer,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

The hardtack's moldy and the spuds they all are rotten,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
And the tinned goods we get are seven years forgotten,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Now each in our hearts has marked the cook for slaughter,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
For the coffee's only chickory, half-soaked in luke-warm water,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

So put on your fancy duds and join our delegation,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
We're gonna ask the Captain for a decent daily ration,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Sure, it ain't the cook's fault that we eat one day in seven,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
It's the owners of this hooker, may they never get to Heaven,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

It's the owners of this hooker that gave us meat that's yellow,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
The cook, after all, he?s a mighty decent fellow,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Oh Lord God in Heaven, when their souls and bodies sever,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
May the owners squat in Hell, gnawing at salt-horse forever,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

'Cept for one thing, oh Lord God in Heaven,
Yo ho, haul 'im away!
Don't let them have no plum duff but one day in seven,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Forever and forever, and unto eternity,
The truck that we're fed every day. Amen!

And thanks again to Q for bringing this rant to our attention.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 04 Feb 05 - 09:00 AM

sheet music at Numachi site

hmmmmmm - not sure if it's the same tune as ranzo ray or not...

Ranzo Ray

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: Charley Noble
Date: 04 Feb 05 - 01:02 PM

Thanks, MMario, for the link to the tune of "Huckleberry Hunting."

I think I'll deep six the 2nd verse which I find kind of arkward. The song's long enough as it is.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 04 Feb 05 - 01:15 PM

I probably would use 1,3,5,6,8,10 and 11.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: CHANTEY OF THE COOK
From: Charley Noble
Date: 04 Feb 05 - 04:51 PM

Hah! I've just come back from my favorite used book store in Hallowell, Maine, with a copy of Harry Kemp's CHANTEYS AND BALLADS, Brentano's, 1920. Not any obvious keepers from a quick scan but interesting enough to go through a couple of times. The "Chantey of the Cook" is on p.p. 34-36.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: Lyr Add: COOK ON BOARD A BARK
From: Charley Noble
Date: 27 Jul 06 - 04:27 PM

This sea song about a sea cook makes a nice follow-up to one that Barry Finn sings called "Cook on Board a Bark." Here's what Barry posted about that song which he learned from master rigger, George Herbert of West Geelong, who in his younger days had been a Cape Horner:

Cook on Board a Bark

I was cook on board a bark,
I was cook on board a bark,
I was cook on board a bark,
That's the way I made my mark;
Slinging up the hash,
Many sailors eat my stew,
They're all dead I'm telling you.

When we're out of bacon fat…(3X)
Then I catch a juicy rat;
I know what to do,
You salts the critter well,
He will last for quite a spell.

You should try my lobster sauce…(3X)
Nothing tastes as well with horse;
It's a lovely course,

You should try my roasted duck…(3X)
I found it floating belly up;
Now it's very tender,
Would you like a leg or wing?
Roasted duck is just the thing.

You should try my spotted dog…(3X)
Though it looks a little waterlogged;
See it jiggle up and down,
Dig in, me lads, this dish assail,
Don't let your hunger be curtailed.

You should try my shark fin soup…(3X)
It's the stuff to make you stoop;

The rest of it, another 4 verses, about lobster tails, custards, whale blubber, beetles and water, rum and beer.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: Lyr Add: COOK ON A BARK
From: Barry Finn
Date: 27 Jul 06 - 04:52 PM

Hi Charlie
From what George says on a tape he sent me (which I finally finished transposing, correct & full version below), that the cook who's trying to sign on by boasting, in this case gets knocked out & left on the dock while the vessel leaves.

Cook On A Bark

I once was a cook on a bark, cook on a bark, cook on a bark
That was were I made my mark
Slinging up the hash
Many sailors ate my stew they're all dead I'm telling you
Old pots I washed but once a year, once a year, once a year
I served water up as rum & beer & it filled them up with cheer

I made custard for the crew, for the crew, for the crew
And it killed just a few, guess my custard's good
Beatles sometimes starts a curse, but it only kills their thirst
You should try my lobster tail, lobster tail, lobster tail
Boiled with blubber off a whale, it will make you ill

When we're out of bacon fat, bacon fat, bacon fat
Then I catch a juicy rat, I know what to do
You salt the critter well, he will last for quite a spell
For I'm a wizard with a rat, with a rat, with a rat
If I use rat's back fat, I'm a wizard with a rat

You should try my lobster sauce, lobster sauce, lobster sauce
Nothing tastes as well with horse, it's a lovely course
You should try my shark-fin soup, it's the stuff to make you stoop
Well there's no better ship at sea, ship at sea, ship at sea
None of them can cook like me, sailors all agree

Cookies, cakes as hard as rocks, hard as rocks, hard as rocks
They're laying down inside of us, oh, lets leave him on the dock!

Charlie, where'd ya get the other duck & dog verses from? That makes a good name for a pub & puke, The Dog An' Duck, maybe a name for one of those old kick 'em & kill 'em joints that I used to frequent. God, talk about sailor's bars. A few of those places that I'd go to in Boston when I was a youngster would sicken most crimps.

Barry

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Chantey of the Cook
From: Charley Noble
Date: 27 Jul 06 - 07:01 PM

Barry-

Errr, "the other duck & dog verses" came from a Barry Finn from an earlier Mudcat thread.

Maybe you should discuss this with him?

Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Chantey of the Cook
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 30 Jul 06 - 11:25 PM

COOK ON A BARK is in the DT, and there are 2 threads about it:
Lyr Req: I Once Was a Cook on a Bark
Lyr Add: Cook on a Bark

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Chantey of the Cook
From: Charley Noble
Date: 31 Jul 06 - 11:01 AM

Bob Coltman composed some verses for this one in one of the threads linked above, and I did one as well that I'd totally forgotten.

Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Chantey of the Cook
From: Charley Noble
Date: 24 May 07 - 04:46 PM

I'm actually learning this one for singing, "The Chantey of the Cook," and as frequently happens I've made some further changes to the original poem:

By Harry Kemp, tramp poet and sometime sailor, ©1920.
Chanteys & Ballads by Harry Kemp, 1920, pp. 34-36
Adapted by Charles Ipcar 2004
Tune: "Huckleberry Hunting"

THE CHANTEY OF THE COOK-2

The Devil take the cook, that greasy-bearded feller,
Way, hey, haul 'im away!
Who feeds us odds and ends and biscuits whiskered yeller,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

The hardtack it's moldy and the spuds they all are rotten,
Way, hey, haul 'im away!
And the salt horse we get is forty years forgotten,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Now each in our heart has marked the cook for slaughter,
Way, hey, haul 'im away!
For the coffee's only chickory, soaked in luke-warm water,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

So lay on your fancy duds and join our delegation,
Way, hey, haul 'im away!
We're gonna ask the Captain for a decent daily ration,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

But, sure, it ain't the cook's fault we eat one day in seven,
Way, hey, haul 'im away!
It's the owners of this hooker, may they never get to Heaven,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

It's the owners of this hooker that bought us meat that's yeller,
Way, hey, haul 'im away!
The cook, after all, he's a mighty decent feller,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

Oh, great God in Heaven, when their souls and bodies sever,
Way, hey, haul 'im away!
May them owners fry in Hell, gnawing old salt-horse forever,
And the home port's a thousand miles away.

If you're interested in other poems by Harry Kemp, and nautical poems by two other old sailor-poets Bill Adams and Burt Franklin Jenness then search for my thread titled "Old Sailor-Poets."

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Chantey of the Cook
From:
Date: 25 May 07 - 08:33 PM

For those interested in the Harry Kemp book "Chanteys and Ballads"

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Chantey of the Cook
From: Charley Noble
Date: 25 May 07 - 09:21 PM

George-

Excellent! It's nice to know there is a way that poeple can download a rare nautical poetry book.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Chantey of the Cook
From:
Date: 25 May 07 - 10:54 PM

Thanks, Charley. Thought I would check that excellent resource that I think Masato gave us a few months ago.