BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!

Subject: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Amos
Date: 28 Mar 02 - 07:39 PM

_________________________________________ ________________________ HR 256 (BR 2906) - T. Burch Encourage the purchase of a submarine to patrol the waters of the Commonwealth and search and destroy all casino riverboats. Mar 25-introduced in House Mar 26-to House Floor _________________________________________ ________________________

A RESOLUTION encouraging the purchase and vigorous use of the USS Louisville 688 VLS Class submarine.

WHEREAS, in the past few years the scourge of the casino riverboat has been an increasingly significant presence on the Ohio River; and

WHEREAS, the Ohio River borders the Commonwealth of Kentucky; and

WHEREAS, the siren song of payola issuing from the discordant calliopes of these gambling vessels has led thousands of Kentucky citizens to vast disappointment and woe; and

WHEREAS, no good can come to the citizens of Kentucky hypnotized from the siren song issuing from these casino riverboats, the engines of which are fired by the hard-earned dollars lost from Kentucky citizens;

NOW, THEREFORE,

Be it resolved by the House of Representatives of the General Assembly of the Commonwealth of Kentucky:

Section 1. The House of Representatives does hereby encourage the formation of the Kentucky Navy and subsequently immediately encourages the purchase and armament of one particularly effective submarine, namely, the USS Louisville 688 VLS Class Submarine, to patrol the portion of the Ohio River under the jurisdiction of the Commonwealth to engage and destroy any casino riverboats that the submarine may encounter.

Section 2. The House of Representatives does hereby authorize the notification of the casino riverboat consulate of this Resolution and impending whoopin' so that they may remove their casino vessels to friendlier waters.

I swear I did not make this up!!

Regards,

Amos

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Gareth
Date: 28 Mar 02 - 07:56 PM

On the other hand I believe there are still some ex Royal Navy "X" and "XE" Hulls still in existance, which might acutually fit in the the Ohio River !!

For details Click 'Ere

Gareth

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Bill D
Date: 28 Mar 02 - 08:45 PM

"discordant calliope"??..played by "nattering nabobs of negativism"?

Spiro LIVES!

(personally, I want to see 'em go at it! Torpedos swooshing as depth charges of rotgut bourbon rain down on the sub!)

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: GUEST
Date: 29 Mar 02 - 12:47 PM

please post the place you got this from no one believes me

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 29 Mar 02 - 01:21 PM

I just hope it works better than the Flying Saucer they commissioned back in the mid-seventies. That never got off the ground. I think it ended up as a bowling alley in Paducah.

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Robin2
Date: 29 Mar 02 - 09:13 PM

With some of the other shenanigans (sp?)happening with our local elected officials, I wouldn't be suprised.

I do like the thought of watching a sub go through the locks though... :)

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 30 Mar 02 - 04:05 PM

I note the original post said the resolution was introduced on such-and-such a date. It does not say that it passed.

It's still hilarious!

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Jeri
Date: 30 Mar 02 - 04:39 PM

I don't know where Amos got it, but here's some confirmation from the KY State Legislature's page.

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Gareth
Date: 30 Mar 02 - 07:08 PM

Ye Gods and lttle fishes
And I thought that the Welsh Assembly was a waste of space !

Sorry Amos - I thought that this was a humorous post.

Delate my thoughts on recommisioning an "X" craft.

Thank the Lord we Brits still have a Nuclear Capability.

Gareth

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Robin2
Date: 30 Mar 02 - 09:16 PM

Oh Lord, I love my state

They can dock it beside the Belle of Louisville. She'll never lose another steamboat race with the USS Louisville looking out for her! BLAM, LOOK OUT DELTA QUEEN!

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 11:03 AM

I hate to spoil the joke by injecting a note of sanity here, but even if the resolution passes it does nothing more than to humorously express disapproval of riverboat gambling--especially for the State licensed (sponsored?) boats of Indiana (and Ohio?). It "encourages" the formation of a navy, and "encourages" the purchase and commissioning of a submarine.

Now if a bill appropriated MONEY for those purposes, THAT would be something else! Not gonna happen, of course.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: gnu
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 11:36 AM

What's the date on that resolution ?

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 03:23 PM

March 26, went to the House floor.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Gareth
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 03:24 PM

Yes it went down to the floor, but did it surface ?

Gareth

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Mary in Kentucky
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 04:45 PM

I don't understand the purpose of this bill...but a little background...

The horse racing industry is losing mucho bucks to the riverboats. It seems that gamblers bet less on the ponies when they can visit the riverboat instead. The Thoroughbred Association is running ads on TV now (sorry Dave ;-) ) showing an obnoxious "Hoosier" bragging about all the new schools and roads in Indiana that Kentuckians have helped fund through gambling taxes. Another little known fact that makes the submarine story even more interesting is that Kentucky owns all of the river. Most boundaries between states are in the middle of the river. There are even a few cases where Kentucky actually owns land on the northern bank, the waterline at a certain date in history.

I hadn't heard about the submarines though. But of course I'm not at all surprised. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: IvanB
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 07:31 PM

My wife and I attended an Elderhostel in Erlanger, KY (one of the Cincinnati suburbs) a few years ago, and one of our field trips was to Rabbit Hash, KY, just across the river from Rising Sun, IN, where one of the casino boats is moored. Apparently, the fact of the KY border being on the north side of the river isn't universal, because the Indiana casino boat is able to travel on the river. However, we were told that the state of Kentucky had laser beams trained along the parts of the river that were Kentucky waters and, if the casino boat broke the beams of those lights, all gambling had to cease until they were once again in Indiana waters.

And, yes, at least for the Ohio/Kentucky border, the KY state line is on the northern bank of where the river was at some time in the past, so there are parts of Cincinnati that are technically in Kentucky.

But just this last week when we stayed overnight in Kentucky on our way home, we heard a news report that casino gambling is being considered for KY. Apparently it will require a change in the state constitution, though, so it may be hard to accomplish.

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Burke
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 08:11 PM

Hmm, looks like something called a resolution, not a bill.

It's HR 256. Take a look here at some of the other House Simple Resolutions for the company it keeps.

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Mary in Kentucky
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 11:05 PM

ooooooooo...scary...simple resolution or not...

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Robin2
Date: 01 Apr 02 - 11:17 PM

I liked SR180, a bill to honor the Louisville Orchestra as a premier orchestra in the US...Poor LO has had so many budget cuts in the last few years, it's hard to keep full time musicians on the payroll!

However,HR256 is a good example of Kentucky humor at it's most dry.

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 07:32 PM

i dont understand this

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 08:47 PM

Hey Robin, how is Actor's Theater doing? I remember going to see them in their first year with my eighth grade class. They were in a warehouse loft down around 4th and Market, and they did a Roman play. Nobody gave Victor and Jon Jory much of a chance of success at that time.

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Mary in Kentucky
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 08:52 PM

Lonesome, Jon Jory left this year. It was a great run.

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Robin2
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 10:00 PM

Lonesome,

As Mary said, Jon has left, and I think it's a sad day for Louisville that we lost him. I remember him from an audition I did years ago (I was scared to DEATH, but he was very kind)

Arts in Louisville have been struggling for lack of funding for several years now, but Actors still seems to be thriving in spite of changes.

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 01:13 PM

Too bad about the arts funding. In the early 70s, the city used to sponsor Shakespeare in Louisville's Central Park, free to the public. What a great way to spend a Summer evening it was. The down side of the "free" side of it was that you would get a lot of local kids hanging around, talking, wrestling, shouting, etc. I recall seeing Julius Caesar, and Victor Jory had a role in it. At one point, when he was not in the scene, he came out to stand in the audience, resplendent in toga and olive garland. A group of kids were cutting up, and Jory turned, pointed at them and intoned in his powerful stage bass voice "You people quiet down NOW!" They stifled as quickly if they had been clubbed.

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: gnu
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 03:15 PM

Yeah, I read the March 26 also.... my question is, what year ?

Subject: RE: BS: Kentucky Votes tyo Buy Sub!
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 04:01 PM

If it's current on the Kentucky Legislature's webpage, it would be this year.

Dave Oesterreich