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BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here!
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Subject: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 14 Jun 02 - 02:24 PM It has been over a year since Little Hawk introduced the idea of Shatner as a Mudcat Icon. At first, it was a running joke that concerned Shatner as the premier example of "the manly man". Soon, LH was running a popularity contest between Shatner and Spaw. Reluctantly, many of us were drawn in. At first, the entire Shatner concept seemed like a whim, but soon it became clear that Little Hawk was not letting up. His attempt to incorporate Shatnerization as part of the daily Mudcat Lexicon met with a mixed response, but soon, other Mudcatters were using the "Shatner" keyword as guaranteed laugh-getter. So here is my question : Has Shatner indeed reached the level where he is a candidate for admission to Official Mudcat Icon Status alongside Tiples, Possums, Paw and Cletus, the Neil Young Center, the Tavern with its Jello Pit, Big Mick's Thong? Please vote for the following that most closely describes your opinion : 1) Yes! Shatner is a great addition to the site. The very idea cracks me up! In fact, I'm laughing right now! 2) Maybe. It's still too soon to tell. I'll wait until Shatner gets some major endorsements. What does Catspaw think, anyhow? 3) No! The very mention of Shatner gives me nausea. Let the damned Trekkies start their own website...the Vulcan Forum or Borgchat. In fact, the word Shatner should trigger an automatic Delete Response in the Mudcat Software. Make yourself heard. Even Little Hawk could be influenced to abide by the result of this vote! Previous Shatner Threads (click) (please do not refresh them) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: mousethief Date: 14 Jun 02 - 02:34 PM HIJACK ALERT! This seems like as good a place as any to dump the lyrics to my song spoof, "Shatner"
SHATNER
Shoop, shadooby, Shatner (2x)
Fans are so alarming
Counselor Troi and Doctor Crusher – sexy sexy sexy sexy!
All this chitter-chatter, chitter-chatter, chitter-chatter 'bout
You got Ferengi in the west ballroom
Look at me! Copyright © 2002 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 14 Jun 02 - 02:40 PM So...that would be #1, MT? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: mousethief Date: 14 Jun 02 - 02:59 PM #3. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Clinton Hammond Date: 14 Jun 02 - 03:03 PM nerds |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: wysiwyg Date: 14 Jun 02 - 03:07 PM No, because LH has admittted deliberately entering Shatner into the Mudcat collective mind just to see if he could implant an icon in that mind (or words to that effect). The other icons emerged because they were creative things that just caught on. I don't like being experimented on or manipulated, and I say we all just ignore any further Shatner Shit in any form. ~Susan |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Clinton Hammond Date: 14 Jun 02 - 03:19 PM gods know you folks -can- ignore something when you put your minds to it... If only spam and flames fell off the pages as fast as THIS thread has...
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 14 Jun 02 - 03:21 PM "Shatner shit" sounds like a #3. Clinton seems like he's voted #3 as well, unless he's naming his favorite hard candy. I can't believe Little Hawk has yet to arrive on the scene. I figured this thread would draw him like a moth to a candle. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: katlaughing Date: 14 Jun 02 - 03:30 PM Absofuckinglutely NUMERO TRES!!! And, I consider myself somewhat of a Trek fan, BUT all-inclusive, not just the Shatupon! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 14 Jun 02 - 03:41 PM So far, with early returns from four precincts in, it appears that the Iconization of Shatner is going down in defeat. It is still too early to make a solid prediction, though. Is the day coming soon when the name Shatner shall no longer ring in these hallowed halls? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Fibula Mattock Date: 14 Jun 02 - 03:49 PM Bloody hell Clinton, I never thought I'd be naive enough to follow one of your links - just goes to show how much bravado can be generated by 3 double gin and tonics! Erm, #2. Has Spaw done a Cletus story on Shatner yet? I am shatnerambivalent. Star Trek is a different matter (lose the moral goody-two-shoes code, introduce some interesting characters and develop a plotline and I might watch the damn thing...nah, maybe not - it's too geeky for me, and I practically live in a computer science department). |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: catspaw49 Date: 14 Jun 02 - 04:02 PM To be truthful, the other icons didn't just happen along either. After something was mentioned, like possums, the idea would begin to grow and would be picked up by one or more "champions" of the cause until damn near the whole place was involved whether they wanted to be or not. In most of the cases Leej listed, I was the main pusher and certainly didn't hesitate to help promote the others. HOWEVER Shatner came along and LH decided to champion the cause to see what it would take and he has done a fine job of getting the name out there. The problem lies not in his maneuvering but in the subject.....Shatner. Being a horse's ass of major proportion and voted actor most likely to never be envied, Shatner isn't anything anyone really wants as an icon. He cannot drink at the Tavern, no one wants to see him in a thong(even one stuffed with a spud), he turns the lime Jell-O purple, the Young Center cannot cure him as his brain is even smaller than his balls, he thinks a tiple is hit you get in in baseball, the Little Pissant covers him daily to no avail, and Cleigh O'Possum will not let him blow up his asspipe for fear of contracting a social disease or rabies. And the guy can't even beat me in a "Who's Sexier" contest!!! Nice try Hawk. "Ya' got the right string Baby, but the wrong yo-yo!" #3Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: CarolC Date: 14 Jun 02 - 04:54 PM 1) Yes! Shatner is a great addition to the site. The very idea cracks me up! In fact, I'm laughing right now!
I pick number one.
Many people don't know the real reason for LH's obsession with Shatner. Sure, he said it was an evil experiment to warp, twist, and manipulate our delicate little minds, but that was only bravado speaking, to cover up the deeper and more poignant truth.
The real story is that Shatner is LH's natural father. That's right. You heard me. It was during Shatner's early days as a Shakespearean (I use the term loosely) actor. He was playing the part of a tree in Midsummer Night's Dream (weird Canadian experimental theater... don't ask me to explain). Hawk's mother was in the audience and she kept giving Shatner the eye. Shatner, being young and, let's face it, a bit full of himself, was swept up in the moment, and he arranged to meet the lovely young woman backstage during intermission.
Shatner didn't have time to remove the tree costume before the next act, but with the creative employment of a knot-hole conveniently situated about halfway up the trunk of the tree, the splendid example of humanity we all know and love as Little Hawk was concieved. The rest is, as we say, history. Hawk's a great guy. Let's let him have his little hero worship, ok? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Sorcha Date: 14 Jun 02 - 05:01 PM LOL Carol!! My vote is still #333333333! We got the lil' Pissant--why do we need Shitner? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: AliUK Date: 14 Jun 02 - 05:07 PM #1 Oh yes definitely #1. The wooden one is a god of great status noo one can touch him. By the way that tree wasn´t a costume in the Play. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: alanabit Date: 14 Jun 02 - 05:12 PM #3 |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 14 Jun 02 - 05:28 PM At this early stage, its already becoming clear that Shatner is in deep trouble. Some who had counted on a strong Catspaw endorsement were grimly silent as he issued a stunning rejection. Barring a stirring, emotional, and uncharacteristically brief defense of his Icon by Little Hawk, Shatner's candidacy resembles the situation of the Titanic at 2:15 AM...dark, soggy, and nearly upside-down. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: mousethief Date: 14 Jun 02 - 05:32 PM chilly too |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: katlaughing Date: 14 Jun 02 - 06:20 PM all of the other icons evolved from our collective creativity...the Shat can't hold a candle to them |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 14 Jun 02 - 06:36 PM Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! LOL!!! ROTFL!!! I love it... Number 1 of course, you dumbasses! 1) Yes! Shatner is a great addition to the site. The very idea cracks me up! In fact, I'm laughing right now! Your estimate of the election thus far is dutiful and meticulous...but sady in error, LEJ! Why do I say this? Because the almost universally low opinion people have of the Great William Shatner, his acting, his appearance, his sexiness, his brilliance, etc...that very LOW opinion is precisely what it is that MAKES him a deathless icon on Mudcat, as well as in the whole world. He is matchless in summoning up criticism. Why else would we name the educational institute found in His honor...the William Shatner School of BAAAAAAD Acting??? 7 By blatantly losing this election, Shatner has in fact WON THIS ELECTION! Face it folks, you're screwed. If he wins, he wins...if he loses, he wins bigger! Shatner is here to stay. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 14 Jun 02 - 06:37 PM p.s. We definitely HAVE Shitnerization! - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: artbrooks Date: 14 Jun 02 - 07:37 PM The available choices are 1, 2 or 3...and 3 is defined as "the very mention of Shatner gives me nausea". In the absence of anything BEYOND 3, such as "#4: The stench of Shatner's jock makes the cockroaches nauseous and triggers a gag reflex in buzzards", I shall have to go along with the clear majority and vote for number 3. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Tweed Date: 14 Jun 02 - 08:18 PM I gotta go for #1 on this one. Shatner is the finest most convincing actor in history. It's too bad Jack Nicholson got the role in "Cuckoo's Nest", a role that was tailor made for this Master of the Thespian Artform. I could go on and on, but why? It's so obvious...the massive contributions to film and television and..er...whut the...GAHHH..GODDAMNED PISSANT! NOT ON THE GITTARZ!..GET AWAY FROM THAT GIBSON....#$@@&*%$#@^^$#$!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: rangeroger Date: 14 Jun 02 - 08:29 PM This just in from the Great Mudcat Precinct of North Idaho; #3 rr |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: GUEST,Just Amy Date: 14 Jun 02 - 08:49 PM I vote for Bill Clinton. I don't care where his thing was. (Talking about the cigar). Aren't they the same guy? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: GUEST,Just Amy Date: 14 Jun 02 - 08:54 PM P.S. I think Opossum is the name of the animal. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 14 Jun 02 - 09:33 PM Excuse me...I meant to say Shatnerization, not "Shitnerization"...honest I did. Geez, talk about Freudian slips! I see that Bill is still pulling in downright vicious insults and personal attacks. Even his jockstrap has been slandered. This is good. Iconhood is guaranteed under these conditions... At least Tweed appreciates his true merits. Genius is often misunderstood, and Bill Shatner's is no exception in this regard. Don't forget, they laughed at Gus Tipwood too. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Tweed Date: 14 Jun 02 - 11:04 PM Easy for you to say LH, for my support efforts of the Great One, I've now got Eau de Pissant wafting through the entire house..that little bastard really pisses me off..Even now the front of the house is under fire from a smallish marsupial shooting rotted persimmons from a hole in it's tail. May be terminally screwed but I'm still standing for Shitener..er Shatner, the King of all Actors. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 15 Jun 02 - 12:32 AM Allow me to point out that Shat is the past tens of Shit as in I sat and I shat. In my best breathy Shatner Imitation. Catspaw, Methinks....... thou dust........ protest , toooooo much. It is my theory that 'Spaw is jealous because Mr. Shatner's acting is the only thing that stinks more than his flatulance. As for this quite pointless vote, well put Little Hawk! Any participation in this thread is a defacto endorsement of Bill's Iconhood. I have been laughing with and at William since 1969. I certianly don't intend to stop because of some silly vote. Bill Shatner has had the good taste to laugh at himself at least since the Saturday Night Live sketch where he told those trekkies to "get a life." William Shatner is a pot bellied Canadian living in the US Southeast. As am I. And by gum! We're are quite a minority and we must stick together! Make no mistake, You have all been Shatnerized. Shatner is an icon who transends Mudcat. An Icon to whom talent is irrelevant. You have all been assimilated!! Two bonus reasons to love Shatner. 1. I recently saw him calling Bill Maher stupid. 2. He has pretty horses! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 15 Jun 02 - 12:41 AM Stand fast, Tweed! Don't give in to terrorism and blackmail. You wouldn't believe the lengths these anti-Shatner people will go to to fix an election and to try to intimidate those among us who have the moral fiber to stand up and state the plain truth in public...that William Shatner is King of stage and screen. The truth is, they're envious of his many superior attributes, and it bugs the hell out of 'em that he's a Canadian! As, I might add, are Jim Carrey, Ian Tyson, Gordon Lightfoot, Shania Twain, Celine Dionne, Buffy Sainte-Marie, Skid Watson, and Wayne Gretzky. Oh, how it rankles...pity about how all those invasion attempts failed so miserably in the War of 1812, eh? Yankee Doodle came to town...and got his butt kicked! Hee! Hee! Stand by for some very interesting revelations as this sordid and falsified election unfolds.... - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: CarolC Date: 15 Jun 02 - 12:52 AM My most trusted informant and digger up of mud, who shall for now remain nameless (ahem - Deep Pockets), has passed on some informaion that I think will be of interest to everyone in this (sham) election.
If the members of the electorate will examine the following pieces of evidence...
They will see that the candidate in question has already been ensrined in the Mudcat as a Mudcat Icon, and has been enjoying said status since no later than April of 2002.
Mr. Lonesome EJ, Sir (may I call you Lonesome?). Lonesome, I am frankly shocked and quite beside myself about this flagrant misuse of whatever it is you're misusing here. This calumny you call an election. This sham of a dog and pony show. Why there's pony and dog droppings all over the place! I think you boys have a lot to answer for. And I'm going to let you give your answer to someone with a hell of a lot more intestinal fortitude than me! Good day Gentlemen! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 15 Jun 02 - 12:58 AM Amy - There are some very intriguing parallels between Bill Shatner and Bill Clinton... Amazing charisma, animal magnetism, unique musical talents, and sex appeal that hits ya like a freight train careening down a 30 degree grade. Then there's leadership too...born leaders, both of them. I could go on and on about this... But I'm not going to. (HUGE sigh of relief from the studio audience...or is that a wave of applause I hear?) It must be something about the name Bill. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: katlaughing Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:05 AM That was my point, exactly, JtS, re' Shat. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:05 AM LH You forgot the pot bellies. And they both have had sex with women who don't look like they are from this planet. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:05 AM Ah hah! Just read Carol's fast-breaking report, and had a quick look at the 2 exhibits... Well, boys, you've been hung by your own petard this time. This election has just been blown right out of the water. It's deader than the Battleship of Maine. Shatner RULES! You knew it then, you know it now. Admit defeat. It's over. :-) - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:12 AM Jack - You're right on both counts. Now the women, though...that's fascinating! I wonder if it's all part of some alien plot...or maybe Clinton and Shatner were establishing diplomatic contacts with the Galactic Federation on behalf of the human race. If so, they have rendered us all an inestimable service. The general public, of course, is still not ready for such a quantum leap in perception, but time will change that, I'm sure. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:14 AM All I can say about Clinton's women is "better him than me." (((Shudder))) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:17 AM LOL! I have to admit I had the same reaction. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:23 AM Well, I had hoped we could keep the election campaign above the level of mere personal attack and innuendo, but it appears the pro-Shatner conclave will stoop to any level to achieve Iconhood. I mean, its a traditional music forum. If we wanted to choose an egotistical, irritating guy, what's wrong with Glen Yarborough? I mean, what are the qualifications here? Who's next? Carrot Top? Anyway, due in part to Little Hawk's rather existential argument that because Shatner is so little deserving of icon status that his very lack of eligibility somehow has bestowed icon status on him, the race has tightened. It is now 8 votes for No Shatner, 5 for Yes Shatner, and 1 for Maybe Shatner. I want to also point out that I have neither voted nor voiced a preference, which speaks to my obvious objectivity in the matter. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: wysiwyg Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:24 AM Yeah but Shatner's women were all virgins, whereas Clinton's obiviously warn't. Bill never swore to go where no man had gone before. ~S~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 15 Jun 02 - 01:35 AM Lonesome Lonesome lonesome Every post on this thread is further evidence of his Iconiveness. You are trying to stop the tides. Would you pull down the moon from her lofty path as you are trying to discredit his Shatnerness. Let me point out that while he may not be quite as large as the moon he is certianly approaching the same shape! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: gnu Date: 15 Jun 02 - 05:44 AM Laughing AND crying, I have no choice but to vote #1. Bill has boldly made a pile of money going where noone else would dare go. And he's got nice horses. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: artbrooks Date: 15 Jun 02 - 09:46 AM How many votes does LH get, anyway?? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Little Hawk Date: 15 Jun 02 - 02:56 PM I get one vote, like anyone else, but the Great Shatner hardly needs my endorsement, as he has already achieved thespian immortality without it. Interesting point about the virgins, Susan! Bill Clinton obviously likes 'em more experienced, but this proves that Shatner edges out Clinton in the seduction department, which is pretty darned impressive. It's a pity that Mr. Shatner could not have secured dual Canadian/American citizenship...and then become President Shatner! Man, just think about it...the inaugural address: "My...fellow Americans...and Canadians too... We...are...at the crossroads! My...administration...hereby swears (looks around firmly and meaningfully)...to boldly go...where no administration...has ever gone before!" Music: Doo..doo...doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.... Hail to the Chief! - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 15 Jun 02 - 03:28 PM Shatner would make a fine president. But for that to happen, Canada, or Montreal would have to merge with the USA. A U.S. president minimally has to be over 35 and BORN here. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Tweed Date: 15 Jun 02 - 03:40 PM I'd like to propose that the entire continent unites into the Federation of North America with Shatner at the helm. The King of All Actors could do no worse than George W., (can't say much about the Canadian PM as he doesn't get much press coverage down this way), and would elevate the fine art of lying on television to an entertaining art form. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: allanwill Date: 15 Jun 02 - 04:59 PM I'd like to lead the Australian contingent by voting No.1, if only for the fact that these threads make great reading. And Little Hawk - don't let them do a Florida on you by "manipulating" the result of this election. Allan |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 15 Jun 02 - 05:17 PM The Shatner issue has tightened up to the point where we have again put it back in the Undecided Category. Shatner is showing amazing resilience, and what appeared initially to be an outright attempt to tar-and-feather the Shatman and run him out of the Forum on a rail has begun to falter in the face of avid support from die-hard Shatnites. Despite surfacing rumors that Shatner may have been a Communist Party member in the late 50s and may have personally participated in the violent repression against the Hungarian Revolution (thus far unsubstantiated), the vote has narrowed to 8 No Shatnonsense, 7 Yes Shatneritis, 1 Maybe Shatninski. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: AliUK Date: 15 Jun 02 - 09:11 PM Just Canada and the U.S? Hell I'd make him president of the whole planet. I mean...given the fact that he had to put up with a manic depressive ships doctor, an anally retentive half-vulcan, a drunken scotsman and a psycotic japanese, he should do well at pulling the races together. Not to mention the fact that the next time there's an earthquake somewhere in the world, no one need to suffer because they'd only be leaning side-to-side and bac-and-forward really. He also got to snog Nichelle Nichols as well...lucky sonovagun. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Shatner Mudcat Icon? Vote Here! From: catspaw49 Date: 15 Jun 02 - 10:42 PM Actually Leej, Shatner left the Communist Party in a huff (a nice 2-door hardtop Huff) when he felt he'd been duped because there was neither ballons nor ice cream and no party games to speak of. As to the situation with Hungary, he completely duffed that one too thinking it had something to do with being hungry...and gawd knows the little porker can eat! It was when he was angered because there was no food that he again let his temper get the best of him...literally, because as he left a planning meeting complaining bitterly about the lack of goulash, his cock and balls were severed by the door of a freight elevator. His original equipment was lost down the shaft and buried in the grease, cigar butts, and Twinkie wrappers below, so doctors gave him a new set consisting of a dessicated gherkin and two raisins. Say, the rail thing gives me an idea! What say we let the little, fat, broke-dick, motherfucker, stay and we can permanently affix the crack of his ass to a rail and whack him back and forth between two cactus plants when things are dull? Spaw |