BS: Cabbage looking

Subject: BS: Cabbage looking
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 09:11 AM

The other day someone said to me "I didn't just fall off the turnip truck, ya know", which made me chuckle. When I was a kid my mother always said, "I didn't come up the Clyde on a water biscuit you know",(I am a Glaswegian of course) and I often say, "I'm not as green as I'm cabbage looking" which is another one of those 'I ain't no rube' type sayings.
Just wondered what similar phrases you use in you neck of the woods?
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Scotus
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 09:36 AM

Didn't come up the Clyde on a banana boat

Jack

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: bfdk
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 09:48 AM

Similar Danish expressions:
I didn't arrive on the 4 o'clock train, you know
I'm not entirely green, you know
I'm not entirely wet behind the ears (as opposed to being "thick behind the ears", which refers to something quite different ;o))

Best wishes,

Bente

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Mrrzy
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 10:11 AM

I've read "aint no flies on me" but I think that's British, and what would it mean anyway - I'm not dead?

I wasn't born yesterday is another one.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: JennyO
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 10:14 AM

Different country from you Giok, but my mother used to say your one - "I'm not as green as I am cabbage-looking". It was in Oz, but my mother's family was from Scotland. Maybe that's where it came from.

I like saying "I'm not as dim as I sim."

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Megan L
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 10:17 AM

I didny come doon in the last shower o rain.
Ahm nae as glaikit as yer gyte :)

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: GUEST,Elfcall
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 10:22 AM

Ahhh Giok - one of my Mam's favourite sayings is 'i'm not as green as I am cabbage looking' - it took me back.

An irish friend used to say ' i didn't just come up on a sugar boat from Carlow'

Elfcall

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 10:24 AM

Not as daft as I look. (No-one could be THAT daft)

Didn't peddle up the Irwell on a bike.

:D

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Megan L
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 10:27 AM

Our old neighbour came from county cork she used to say I'm no as daft as a Kerryman.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Scotus
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 11:39 AM

That should have been, of course -

Ah didnae come up the Clyde oan a bananay boa' (glottal T)

Jack

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 11:56 AM

Fresh air?

You've never been near Manitas when he's been drinking Guinness....


LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: ClaireBear
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 11:58 AM

My mama didn't raise no fools.

(always said precisely that way, despite grammatical peculiarities)

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 12:22 PM

I might be stupid, but I ain't foolish.

Or as it reported that the Business Council at the Ft. Hall Shoshone-Bannock Reservation said to a guy peddling a coal gasification plant, "We might be Indians, be we're not dumb Indians!"

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: SharonA
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 12:57 PM

But why "cabbage-looking"? What does that mean -- is it intended to be a self-deprecating remark about the size and/or shape of the speaker's head?

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Jim Lad
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 01:04 PM

Yer as thick as two short planks.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: gnu
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 01:25 PM

When someone says something odd or stunned in Newfoundland, "I'll pick da bones outta dat fish and see if I can get 'n down me t'roat."

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: GUEST,dianavan
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 01:48 PM

Do I look stupid?

or

There is no shit on my boots!

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Morticia
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 03:34 PM

I didn't come up the Shannon on a banana boat my mum says.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Bizibod
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 03:59 PM

I didn't just drop off a Christmas tree

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Wesley S
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 04:07 PM

I may have fallen off a turnip truck but it wasn't yesterday.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Jim Lad
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 04:14 PM

As a matter of fact, I do have a roll of quarters in me pocket.





I'll shut the door behind me.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 04:32 PM

There is no shit on my boots!

Always eliciting the response in my area:

"Look on the inside."

John

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: van lingle
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 04:51 PM

"This ain't my first rodeo!"

"Poco loco pero no estupido."

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 05:33 PM

I remember not so green as cabbage looking. A bit worrying because I was a Green at the time.

Kitty (nee Green)

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Rowan
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 06:32 PM

I also remember 'I may be green but I'm not cabbage-looking" from my youth (in Oz) where, in similar circumstances, it was also said "I didn't come down in the last shower". In times of drought the latter wouldn't carry the intended sting quite as well.

And if someone said "There's no flies on ... (me, him etc)" a swift counter often followed;
"No? But you can see where they've been!"

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: frogprince
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 08:02 PM

I'm in the U.S. My Dad referred to the "no flies", particularly as in the lyric of a 1920's song; something like "There are no flies on Nellie, and I will tell you why; she rolls her stockings to the knee, and when she sits down you can see...Oh, my!"

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Jim Lad
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 08:34 PM

As dumb as a bag of hammers.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Mickey191
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 10:25 PM

Mine is not half as colorful as all the preceding:
I wasn't born yesterday.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: JennyO
Date: 10 Jul 07 - 11:28 PM

Of course I remember 'no flies' but I'd forgotten about it. The following aren't exactly the same thing - they mean the opposite. Maybe they deserve their own thread. There's probably one somewhere already.

As dumb as a bunch of rocks

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 11 Jul 07 - 12:53 AM

Three bricks short of a wagon load?

Or in extreme cases:

Three straws short of a bale.

"short" commonly also as "shy of," and "wagon load" sometimes as just "full load."

As we're into slightly different connotations:

Beat with an ugly stick.

Fell out of the ugly tree and hit all the branches on the way down.

John

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Rowan
Date: 11 Jul 07 - 01:02 AM

I like them John, but JennyO is right; there is another thread with a collection of just such sayings as yours (the "short of" motif) from US, UK and Oz at least.

Meanwhile there is another old "cabbage-looking" lurking behind my ears but I can't yet coax it into view.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Rowan
Date: 11 Jul 07 - 01:10 AM

Well, I just found the other thread; it's Folklore: Regional expressions.

I mightn't be the sharpest knife in the drawer nor the brightest crayon in the box but I'm not two bricks short of a wall and the memory hasn't completely failed me yet.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: JennyO
Date: 11 Jul 07 - 04:07 AM

And here's a link to that thread. I just refreshed it.

Folklore: Regional expressions

Jenny - choofing off now.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: SharonA
Date: 11 Jul 07 - 11:34 AM

Still wanting someone to explain just what "cabbage looking" means.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: ClaireBear
Date: 11 Jul 07 - 12:21 PM

I wonder if it bears any relation to babies coming from the cabbage patch?

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Jul 07 - 12:53 PM

It's just a bass akwards way of saying, I may look like a cabbage, but I'm not green.
G

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: alison
Date: 11 Jul 07 - 11:54 PM

Do you think I came down the Lagan in a bubble? (Belfast)

slainte

alison

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Rowan
Date: 12 Jul 07 - 12:35 AM

At last, I remembered it and, as soon as I did so, I remembered another;

"I'm not stupid, it's just the way they dress me." was the first and,
saying that someone was a bit 'green' or 'wet behind the ears' it was said

"He's been shaving since he was 15. And cut himself, both times."

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 12 Jul 07 - 02:35 PM

On the Honking Duck website you can hear - They Ain't No Flies On Auntie | Akins Birmingham Boys

For some reason I currently have blanked out on any and all local expressions.
Quack!
GtD.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Mo the caller
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 04:54 AM

We have a family expression when anyone says or does something daft - "whats thick and stupid?"

It comes from a mistelling of the joke
What's yellow and stupid?
Thick custard

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 02:29 PM

'one sandwich short of a picnic'

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 02:57 PM

Ah Jane, that's a whole other thread that one.
G.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: GUEST,JTT
Date: 14 Jul 07 - 11:12 AM

Not as green as I'm cabbage-looking is also very Irish - specifically Dublin - though whether it came from Scotland/Northern England or went there, I don't know.

I didn't come up the Liffey on a bicycle also. Thick as a kish of brogues (ie a basket of boots).

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Rowan
Date: 15 Jul 07 - 01:11 AM

On the Oz news last night was an item about a student who'd been visiting Pakistan and had, on his return to Melbourne, been diagnosed with polio; it is Australia's first polio case for 21 years, apparently. It reminded me of a description, often used in Oz, of somone who is regarded as utterly lazy;
"He wouldn't work in an iron lung!"

This then brought to mind a phrase usually used to describe a completely untrustworthy person (and thus often applied to politicians);
"He couldn't lie straight in bed!"

Sorry for the thread drift.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Charmion
Date: 15 Jul 07 - 08:06 AM

The Ottawa Valley variant is something like this: "I may have come down the river on a raft, but it wasn't just last Tuesday."

I remember hearing "not so green as I am cabbage-looking" 30-odd (very odd) years ago in Nova Scotia, but I can't remember if it was from a native-born Canadian or a Brit import.

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Cattail
Date: 15 Jul 07 - 02:25 PM

When I worked in engineering the usual reply to

"There's no flies on me" was

"no, you're too rotten for them to settle"

Cheers

Cattail !

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: The Walrus
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 03:24 AM

I still use the "Cabbage looking" line (Londoner, born and bread)

also

"I didn't walk out of the last pea-souper"
I've never quite understood that one, other than 'I'm not new',

so add to that:

"My knees are brown"

W

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: The Walrus
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 03:26 AM

Correction:

also

"I didn't walk out of the last pea-souper"
I've never quite understood that one, other than 'I'm not new'...

should read

"I've also heard

"I didn't walk out of the last pea-souper"
I've never quite understood that one, other than 'I'm not new'...

W

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Rowan
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 03:40 AM

The following might be better under the Regional Expressions thread, as Americans use "elevator" where we use "lift" but the intent of the story is the same as in this thread.

It concerns a bloke from Tibooburra (way out 'back o' Bourke' and well beyond the black stump) who had to go to his insurance company's head office in Sydney. He'd never been to the smoke before and was amazed at the huge buildings. He found the correct building and was, as you might expect, confronted with a wall of glass in which a set of glass doors had signs reading "Push". So he pushed one, it opened and he went in. Just inside was another wall of glass with a similar set of glass doors; these had signs which read "Pull" so he pulled one and it opened and he went through.

Inside was a huge atrium with, opposite the glass doors, a wall of marble. Set into the marble was another set of doors and he struggled there for hours; the signs on these doors read "Lift".

But you wouldn't dare call him a new chum. Or even wet behind the ears. Perhaps an innocent abroad.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: The Walrus
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 08:25 PM

Rowan,

Doubtless he was arrested the first time he met a young lady in a tight sweater wearing a name tag 'Pat'.


Don't bother, I've already got my coat...

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: Rowan
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 09:33 PM

Funny you should mention it, Walrus. I was standing in a coffee queue on campus a while ago and a young lady (whom I'd never seen before) behind me was wearing a T shirt with "PLACEBO" across it, strategically. Not realising it was the name of a band (ah, such ignorance!) I thought about the word for a while and then asked her, "Do they have the same effect as the real thing?"

She didn't immediately realise what I was referring to but, when I pointed to the word, she got the joke and laughed. A few days later I was in the coffee queue again and she was working behind the counter making the coffee; she told me she'd told a friend of hers about my comment and the friend had immediately said, "Oh, that must have been Rowan!" So I 'fessed up' and introduced myself, marvelling at network theory; I was amazed I could be so easily identified.

Still in the queue I then told her about the Ag Science student (another young lady) I'd once taught who was wearing a T shirt with a provocative comment about sowing wild oats; I suggested to her that she keep a good supply of Roundup (a popular weedkiller here) but the student hadn't a clue what I'd meant. The coffee maker did though; she wasn't green, just young.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: JennyO
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 11:45 PM

That reminds me - I used to have an apricot-coloured t shirt that had the words "Freshly Squeezed" across the chest area, with a drawing of dripping slices of orange.

I liked it and enjoyed the comments - treating it like a bit of fun, until my husband-to-be, who turned out to be a bit of a prude, showed his disapproval.

Years later, when we were separated but taking the kids to Australia's Wonderland on an extremely hot (100 degrees C) day, he showed his disapproval of me jumping in the fountain with my kids and lots of other people who were sensibly cooling off (adults as well as children). He said the wet t shirt was 'too revealing', but by that time I didn't care, and laughed it off. I was the one that was cool and comfortable while he was hot and bothered. Ten minutes later everything was just about dry anyway.

Thank goodness my kids seem to take after me more than him!

Subject: RE: BS: Cabbage looking
From: GUEST,Shimrod
Date: 17 Jul 07 - 08:50 AM

I usually say, "I'm not as green as YOU'RE cabbage looking". No self-deprecation for me!