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Malapropisms

bubblyrat 18 Aug 07 - 11:51 AM
bubblyrat 18 Aug 07 - 11:53 AM
Becca72 18 Aug 07 - 12:24 PM
Bainbo 18 Aug 07 - 01:13 PM
Micca 18 Aug 07 - 01:25 PM
Georgiansilver 18 Aug 07 - 01:52 PM
GUEST,Desdemona 18 Aug 07 - 02:01 PM
Cluin 18 Aug 07 - 02:04 PM
Georgiansilver 18 Aug 07 - 02:47 PM
Micca 18 Aug 07 - 03:12 PM
Bainbo 18 Aug 07 - 03:15 PM
Alba 18 Aug 07 - 03:26 PM
RangerSteve 18 Aug 07 - 03:29 PM
Arnie 18 Aug 07 - 04:09 PM
Bonzo3legs 18 Aug 07 - 04:13 PM
Rog Peek 18 Aug 07 - 04:32 PM
Wolfhound person 18 Aug 07 - 05:31 PM
Bill D 18 Aug 07 - 05:41 PM
bubblyrat 18 Aug 07 - 05:42 PM
bubblyrat 18 Aug 07 - 05:44 PM
sneeble 18 Aug 07 - 05:48 PM
Rog Peek 18 Aug 07 - 05:52 PM
Joe_F 18 Aug 07 - 08:03 PM
GUEST,heric 18 Aug 07 - 08:40 PM
RangerSteve 18 Aug 07 - 08:47 PM
Bill D 18 Aug 07 - 09:35 PM
Micca 18 Aug 07 - 09:37 PM
TheSnail 18 Aug 07 - 11:07 PM
mrdux 19 Aug 07 - 02:33 AM
sneeble 19 Aug 07 - 05:25 AM
DMcG 19 Aug 07 - 07:36 AM
bubblyrat 19 Aug 07 - 08:34 AM
Bill D 19 Aug 07 - 10:01 AM
Bill D 19 Aug 07 - 10:06 AM
Flash Company 19 Aug 07 - 10:22 AM
Alice 19 Aug 07 - 10:23 AM
Alice 19 Aug 07 - 10:23 AM
Alice 19 Aug 07 - 10:35 AM
RangerSteve 19 Aug 07 - 11:10 AM
Bill D 19 Aug 07 - 11:12 AM
Dave the Gnome 19 Aug 07 - 12:03 PM
John Hardly 19 Aug 07 - 12:10 PM
GUEST,heric 19 Aug 07 - 01:32 PM
Amos 19 Aug 07 - 01:47 PM
John Hardly 19 Aug 07 - 01:50 PM
Micca 19 Aug 07 - 02:31 PM
katlaughing 19 Aug 07 - 03:19 PM
John Hardly 19 Aug 07 - 03:27 PM
Genie 19 Aug 07 - 04:16 PM
Amos 19 Aug 07 - 05:05 PM
dick greenhaus 19 Aug 07 - 05:11 PM
Micca 19 Aug 07 - 06:26 PM
Liz the Squeak 19 Aug 07 - 06:43 PM
dulcimer42 19 Aug 07 - 06:59 PM
Amos 19 Aug 07 - 07:00 PM
dulcimer42 19 Aug 07 - 07:04 PM
Rog Peek 19 Aug 07 - 07:51 PM
katlaughing 19 Aug 07 - 09:11 PM
Genie 20 Aug 07 - 12:37 AM
Genie 20 Aug 07 - 12:41 AM
Genie 20 Aug 07 - 12:45 AM
katlaughing 20 Aug 07 - 12:58 AM
Liz the Squeak 20 Aug 07 - 02:50 AM
Mr Red 20 Aug 07 - 08:05 AM
Wolfhound person 20 Aug 07 - 09:41 AM
Liz the Squeak 20 Aug 07 - 10:37 AM
Liz the Squeak 20 Aug 07 - 11:12 AM
HouseCat 20 Aug 07 - 01:44 PM
Bill D 20 Aug 07 - 02:13 PM
Cluin 20 Aug 07 - 04:13 PM
Micca 20 Aug 07 - 06:14 PM
Joe_F 20 Aug 07 - 11:29 PM
TRUBRIT 21 Aug 07 - 12:32 AM
Genie 21 Aug 07 - 01:13 AM
JennyO 21 Aug 07 - 06:29 AM
JennyO 21 Aug 07 - 08:57 AM
Mr Happy 21 Aug 07 - 09:26 AM
HouseCat 21 Aug 07 - 09:48 AM
GUEST 21 Aug 07 - 04:17 PM
North/South Annie 22 Aug 07 - 03:17 PM
George Papavgeris 22 Aug 07 - 03:27 PM
George Papavgeris 22 Aug 07 - 03:28 PM
RangerSteve 22 Aug 07 - 03:57 PM
Liz the Squeak 22 Aug 07 - 06:48 PM
TheSnail 22 Aug 07 - 07:49 PM
Ron Davies 22 Aug 07 - 08:44 PM
TheSnail 22 Aug 07 - 09:00 PM
Bert 22 Aug 07 - 11:37 PM
Genie 23 Aug 07 - 12:49 AM
GUEST,Neil 23 Aug 07 - 12:42 PM
Wolfhound person 23 Aug 07 - 02:21 PM
katlaughing 23 Aug 07 - 02:27 PM
Genie 23 Aug 07 - 04:37 PM
Ron Davies 23 Aug 07 - 10:33 PM
katlaughing 23 Aug 07 - 10:52 PM
HouseCat 24 Aug 07 - 09:24 AM
Ron Davies 24 Aug 07 - 10:53 PM
HouseCat 25 Aug 07 - 12:12 PM
Genie 25 Aug 07 - 12:37 PM
Geordie-Peorgie 25 Aug 07 - 04:50 PM
Little Hawk 25 Aug 07 - 04:54 PM
terrier 25 Aug 07 - 05:56 PM
Geordie-Peorgie 26 Aug 07 - 02:41 AM
Bainbo 26 Aug 07 - 06:23 AM
JennyO 26 Aug 07 - 09:16 AM
Bill D 26 Aug 07 - 10:41 AM
Genie 26 Aug 07 - 02:17 PM
Geordie-Peorgie 26 Aug 07 - 05:53 PM
terrier 26 Aug 07 - 07:03 PM
JennyO 27 Aug 07 - 09:51 AM
DMcG 27 Aug 07 - 10:52 AM
bfdk 27 Aug 07 - 03:29 PM
Jim Dixon 27 Aug 07 - 04:08 PM
Stringsinger 27 Aug 07 - 05:25 PM
Stringsinger 27 Aug 07 - 05:28 PM
Greg B 27 Aug 07 - 07:39 PM
The Fooles Troupe 27 Aug 07 - 07:52 PM
Uncle_DaveO 28 Aug 07 - 04:20 PM
Bert 29 Aug 07 - 01:01 AM
Genie 29 Aug 07 - 01:59 AM
GUEST,HiLo 29 Aug 07 - 11:04 AM
Genie 29 Aug 07 - 12:17 PM
Geordie-Peorgie 29 Aug 07 - 06:09 PM
Bert 29 Aug 07 - 06:34 PM
Stringsinger 29 Aug 07 - 07:09 PM
Bill D 29 Aug 07 - 07:15 PM
The Fooles Troupe 30 Aug 07 - 09:21 AM
Geordie-Peorgie 30 Aug 07 - 05:32 PM
Bert 31 Aug 07 - 12:30 AM
Hawker 31 Aug 07 - 06:34 AM
GUEST,HughM 31 Aug 07 - 08:14 AM
Geordie-Peorgie 31 Aug 07 - 01:12 PM
Genie 31 Aug 07 - 08:28 PM
Bainbo 08 Sep 07 - 05:53 AM
gnu 08 Sep 07 - 07:06 AM
Bainbo 08 Sep 07 - 11:55 AM
Genie 08 Sep 07 - 01:32 PM
GUEST,Irene 08 Sep 07 - 02:52 PM
Mike Miller 08 Sep 07 - 04:29 PM
gnu 08 Sep 07 - 07:13 PM
GUEST,Bert on Kelly's machine. 08 Sep 07 - 08:07 PM
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Subject: Malapropisms
From: bubblyrat
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 11:51 AM

On the BBC main news this morning, the Sports Presenter,discussing the possibility of cricket star Shane Warne adopting German nationality, said that he (Warne ) , had been told that he was , I quote, " Illegible " ----!!! Some years ago, an acquaintance told me of the stray cat he & his wife had found, ragged and starving, in the street, and assured me that the animal was " totally emancipated " ( !!) -----Anyone else got any similar stories ???


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: bubblyrat
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 11:53 AM

Sorry , I put this in the wrong section !! Please forgive !!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Becca72
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 12:24 PM

An ex-boyfriend, when he wanted me to provide finer detail, would tell me I needed to be more pacific.

For some reason he got quite upset when I asked, "does that mean I have to go to the other side of the country and tell you the same damned thing again?"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bainbo
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 01:13 PM

I sub-edit copy on a local newspaper. Oddly enough, bubblyrat, just the other day I was handling a report of an animal cruelty case in which one of the dogs was said to have been found to be in an emancipated state.

Another one which was spotted in time, just yesterday, was a travel feature on Portugal which said the River Douro was home to several extinct birds.

But one which got past everybody a few years ago and appeared in print - written by a fast-rising young reporter - mentioned renowned father of English literature the Vulnerable Bede.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Micca
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 01:25 PM

I Love Malapropisms!!!
The mother of a friend had a genius for getting things mixed
2 of her more memorable ones were:
" The sea is a calm as a mildew"
and she always refferred to a certain German desert made of chocolate cherrys and cream as
"Black Florist Gateaux!!"
I always thought it was the "Venomous Bede"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 01:52 PM

Some I don't love...the British "I should of" instead of "I should have".....I could of...I would of..etc etc ... can they not get it right it is HAVE...HAVE...not OF .....gets on my nerves.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST,Desdemona
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 02:01 PM

My mother once had a neighbour who declared herself fond of "sympathy" music...

But my all-time favourite was when an acquaintance who was making arrangements for an elderly relative to enter a nursing home mentioned that she had acquired "the power of eternity!"

~D


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Cluin
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 02:04 PM

I hate hearing "excape" and "nucular".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 02:47 PM

My other non-favourite is in the UK to hear someone talking about a "Robin Reliant" car which should be a "Reliant Robin" Grrrrrrrr


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Micca
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 03:12 PM

and I HATE "CerSTIFFicate", it is CerTIFicate!!!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bainbo
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 03:15 PM

Yeah, but mispronunciatuins or just plain getting things wrong aren't malapropisms. A malapropism is when you unconsciously substitute an inappropriate word that sounds the same as the one you mean, so that the effect is absurd.

The original Mrs Malaprop, in Sheridan's play The Rivals, famously spoke of someone being as headstrong as an allegory on the banks of the Nile, and described someone as being the very pineapple of politeness.

By that definition, my example above extinct birds isn't a malapropism either. I'm straining to think of more examples I've heard, but can't up with any right now. Love the Black Florist Gateaux, Micca!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Alba
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 03:26 PM

My wonderful Grandmother had a habit of getting words mixed up. I remember her telling me to use my hankie when I had a cold as I would.." breath better without all that Guitar blocking my nose"...smile

Another time, years later, Gran was telling me that a Friend of mine had given brith to a lovely baby Girl but the baby was premature so the Doctors were keeping the wee one in an Incinerator for the time being.

Jings I miss my Nana.
Love and Light
Jude


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: RangerSteve
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 03:29 PM

Someone I know once mentioned Michelangelo's painting in the Sixteenth Chapel.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Arnie
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 04:09 PM

Personally, I prefer spoonerisms....


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bonzo3legs
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 04:13 PM

Director's renumeration!!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Rog Peek
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 04:32 PM

Some years ago, my mother in law charged with the task of buying some incontinent underpants for an elderly relative, went into a chemist (drug store), marched up to the counter and said to the shop assistant "do you sell continental pants here?"

By the way Georgiansilver, when people mistakenly call it a Robin Reliant, they are usually talking about the van in Only Fools and Horses, which is in fact not a Robin, but a Reliant Rebel - even more infuriating!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Wolfhound person
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 05:31 PM

I had an aunt who reputedly went through an entire conversation with a new male acquaintance at a party, using the word "erotic" when she meant "erudite".
This probably wouldn't matter today, but 50 years ago.......

Georgiansilver, isn't "should of" a mispronunciation of "should've"?
I agree it's dreadful,when it's clearly "of", but I fear it's grammatically correct otherwise.

Paws


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bill D
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 05:41 PM

found this one-

"I might just fade into Bolivian, you know what I mean?" — Mike Tyson


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: bubblyrat
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 05:42 PM

When I was growing up in Sussex, there was a girl in our little group who would always point to tracks on the ground and exclaim " Look ! - Footsteps ! " She would also ,of course, when hearing someone approaching, say " I can hear footprints ! ". On a more recent note, the "Henley Standard" has been carrying an advertisemant for a very expensive house that was, apparently, " Formally two cottages " ! ---I wonder what it was informally ?? And, of course, there are regular references to the " Principle bedroom " !!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: bubblyrat
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 05:44 PM

An advertisemEnt, even !! OOps !!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: sneeble
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 05:48 PM

The one which always drives me crazy is brought and bought. I constantly hear "I brought a car/house/fruit today". My usual response which confuses people goes like this, "Really, where did you bring it from?". Most people don't understand my question.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Rog Peek
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 05:52 PM

Should've is an abbreviation for should have where the 'ha' is dropped and replaced by an apostrophe. It is quite often written as 'should of' by those who believe that this is correct.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Joe_F
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 08:03 PM

Another quotation from the eponymous Mrs Malaprop (in Fowler s.v. malapropisms):

Sure, if I reprehend anything in this world, it is the use of my oracular tongue, and a nice derangement of epitaphs. (apprehend, vernacular, arrangement, epithets)

The line between malapropisms & eggcorns, and between them & folk etymologies, must sometimes be a fine one.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST,heric
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 08:40 PM

This is a dangerous thread to read. Now I will be wary of stumbling if I try to say oblivian.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: RangerSteve
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 08:47 PM

Working in a state park on the outskirts of Jersey City, we monitored the Jersey City Police radios. One night, I heard an officer report that he was pulling a woman over for erotic driving.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bill D
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 09:35 PM

Some famous person..(I forget now, who)..once said that they were always VERY careful not to even try constructing a sentence about "circumscribing the world".

And I actually heard a little lid on the Art Linkletter show many years ago say in answer to Art's questioning that he'd "like to be an Octopus"!

"Why?"

"Becuase then I could wrap my testicles around everyone!"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Micca
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 09:37 PM

Another I remember " It was a Virtual Tour de France" (instead of a "veritable tour de force")


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: TheSnail
Date: 18 Aug 07 - 11:07 PM

The man's a suppository of information.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: mrdux
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 02:33 AM

a couple of my favorites

"I don't like voting. Voting creates such decisiveness....."

                               - administrator of a non-profit organization, in response to the suggestion that a particularly contentious issue be put to a vote. March, 1998.



"In a perfect world, one should receive nothing but well wishes and blessings when one decides to enter into the sanctimony of marriage."

                                – an unnamed Hollywood publicist, speaking about Britney Spears. quoted by Stacy Jenel Smith, "Image Advice for Britney Spears." Netscape Network, 7 October, 2004


michael


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: sneeble
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 05:25 AM

I recently attended the work stall at a boat and had to say these words to fisherman - with a straight face "It's stimulate with pheromones". Nevertheless I had a very hard job keeping a straight face and the punters were worse.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: DMcG
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 07:36 AM

Just today, my wife, intending to say she was contemplating during a sermon in church, declared she was pontificating during it.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: bubblyrat
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 08:34 AM

She must have been on the horns of a Dalai Llama as to which one to choose-----and, in one Foul Swoop, got the wrong one !!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bill D
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 10:01 AM

I can't decide which is worse...a horny llama, or lama.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bill D
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 10:06 AM

Come to think of it, I'm not sure whether to worry more about a Dalai Lama, or a dallying llama....I suppose it depends on how horny they are.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Flash Company
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 10:22 AM

Our dear next door neighbour often says 'When will dinner be ready, Keith, I'm ravishing'. (She is, but I think she means ravenous!)

FC


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Alice
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 10:23 AM

I once had someone ask me what "kids" gloves were, and wouldn't they be too small for an adult.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Alice
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 10:23 AM

.... and why would something need to be handled with kids gloves.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Alice
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 10:35 AM

Annual company sales convention, the end of the week, one of the district managers
volunteered to go on stage and do an example of a sales presentation. One of the company trainers
role-played the part of a business owner, the manager started out with his presentation...
I CRINGED when the manager replied to one objection of the client with "no, that
is a MISNOMER" when he should have said, "that's a MISCONCEPTION"... I wondered
how many of the 500+ sales people in the audience even noticed the mistake.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: RangerSteve
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 11:10 AM

I don't suppose it's a true malapropism if I realize my mistake, but just this morning I made a reference to a movie "The Devil Wears Pravda".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bill D
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 11:12 AM

As you have noticed, Alice, it is sometimes a curse to have a good command of the language in a group where there is doubt about the overall level of comprehension.
You KNOW it is best to hold your tongue, but it sure is difficult at times!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 12:03 PM

Hilda Baker was the master of it of course but my late Mum-in-law had some good un's. She used to take anti-inflamable tablets as well as carving meat with a lacerated edge knife:-)

Dave


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: John Hardly
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 12:10 PM

Fun & Profit With Malaprops!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST,heric
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 01:32 PM

Just plain illiteracy, but when the theme of the week was that Obama was naive, I saw/heard a talking head GOP "consultant" on CNN say naivitivity (meaning, ironicaly, his lack of sophistication or worldliness.) I didn't believe it the first time, but she said it twice more, clear as day.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Amos
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 01:47 PM

One could argue that a certain naivité is far preferable to abysmal ignorance.

Obama may be less scarred by hard experience than some, but he is no barbarian.


A


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: John Hardly
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 01:50 PM

Obama may be less scarred by hard experience than some, but he is no barbarian.

YEAH! ...it's Edwards who gets his $400 hair cut by his barbarian!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Micca
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 02:31 PM

he is the very flower of shovelry


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: katlaughing
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 03:19 PM

Here I always thought it was one fowl swoop!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: John Hardly
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 03:27 PM

Nope. I have it one good authority that it is "One Fell Soup"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 04:16 PM

Actually, Kat, it's "one fell swoop" -- a term that confused me so much when I was a child that I tended to spoonerise it to "one swell foop."   (I guess it's originally a logging term or something like that.)

But I digress.

One malapropism I hear all too often, including in song, is the use of "hoi polloi" to (judging from context) mean "high brow" or "elite." It's obviously a confusion of "hoi polloi" (the "rabble" or "great unwashed") with "hoity-toity."

My brother -- who knows better -- once slipped during a lecture and referred to the movie "Who's Afraid Of Virginia Woolf," in which the two main characters were "always throwing epitaphs at each other."

Then there's the common misspelling that yields: "I'm waiting with baited breath."
(I always wondered what one would use for the "bait.")


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Amos
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 05:05 PM

LOGGING term? C'MAhn!!

Fell means cruel or evil. A swoop is a diving attack. A fell swoop is a cruel attack by a bird of prey.


A


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 05:11 PM

I recall (with apropriate shudders) the secretary at Monsanto's Plastic and Resins Division who decided that a 40-page report on the rheology of thermosplastics should be on the theology of thermoplastics. Nobody caught it, and it was circulated up through top management.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Micca
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 06:26 PM

Dick, could that be where the Idea of the "Plastic Jesus"came from?


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 06:43 PM

We had the good old 'lying prostate before the Lord' this morning...

LTS


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: dulcimer42
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 06:59 PM

Then there are the cute ones that come innocently out of the mouths of kids. One of my kindergarten girls told me "A E I O U. My mom's been working on my vowels" Another child heard this and said, "My mom's been working on my bowels too, 'cause I've been constipated."


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Amos
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 07:00 PM

It's endemic among prostates that they induce lying of one sort or another, or both.

Odd, that.


A


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: dulcimer42
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 07:04 PM

A couple of other cute kindergarten ones,
Jummy told me "My mommie's been sick and I think I'm coming down with it too. It's the testicle flu. It's going around, you know"

Another:
Jeremy said, "You'll never believe this. The family that lives with us has 3 boys and they all have chicken cox!" Nope, I couldn't believe it!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Rog Peek
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 07:51 PM

dulcimer42's post reminded me of a joke I heard in a Pub in Ireland, told by Ger Collins a well known fiddle player. Not really malapropisms, more a case of euphemisms maybe.

Pat Murphy a very shy farmer married Mary Cronin and on the wedding night Pat's shyness got the better of him, so when Mary who'd gone up to bed called to Pat he said he would be up as soon as he'd finished his cigarette. Half an hour passed and Mary again called to Pat. "I'll be up shortly" he said, "I've just got to check on the cows". Anyway, another half hour past and when Mary called, Pat decided he'd have to make the effort, and made his way slowly up to bed.

Mary said "Come now Pat, are you going to get undressed or not?" So slowly, Pat began to remove his shoes and socks. When Mary saw Pat's feet, she said "You've the strangest toes Pat, how did they get like that?
"Sure" Pat said "I had a bad case of Tolio when I was a small child"
"Don't you mean Polio?" she said
"Not at all" says he "Me mother definitely said it was Tolio"
At that, Pat slowly undid his belt and his trousers fell to the floor. On seeing Pat's knees, Mary exclaimed "You've very strange knees Pat, how did they get like that"
"Ah sure" he said "I had a very bad case of neasles when I was a child"
"Don't you mean measles?" said Mary
"No, no, me mother said it was a very bad case of neasles." Pat replied.
"Come on then " Mary said hurry up and get undressed and get into bed."
Pat began very slowly to remove his underpants, whereupon Mary began to laugh.
"What are you laughing at" said Pat
"Well" said Mary "It's very clear to me that as a child, you had a dreadful case of small pox!"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: katlaughing
Date: 19 Aug 07 - 09:11 PM

Genie, I know that. I was punning on the previous malapropisms.:-)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 12:37 AM

Thanks for setting me straight re "fell swoop," Amos.   After my initial befuddlement about the term, I connected it with the verb "to fell," as in "to cut down." Hence my guess that it was from logging (or some other sort of "harvesting").    Like many another etymological theory, it made sense, even if historically incorrecct.

:)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 12:41 AM

"The power of our elected officials is circumcized by the Constitution."


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 12:45 AM

Kat, I figured you did know that (it was "fell swoop"). I was basically commenting on how confusing I found the term when I first heard it -- so it's not surprising that SOME people may unwittingly transform it to "one foul swoop," "one full swoop," etc.

:)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: katlaughing
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 12:58 AM

Ah, thanks, Genie.

My youngest daughter used to mix all kinds of things. One I can remember was fitchpork.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 02:50 AM

If we're going to stray into Spoonerisms... one that has stuck with me for over 25 years... the announcer on Radio 4, warning us of serious delays with flights from Gatport Airwick.

We have also had flower derangments at church, the palm of the day and an enquiry sustaining to a wedding.

LTS


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Mr Red
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 08:05 AM

And I always thought the fell in fell swoop was running down the mountainside (fell) and descending on your enemy having gained the momentum of the slope.

And I still think it.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Wolfhound person
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 09:41 AM

I've just remembered:

Small daughter to friend at first school "My dad's a lecherer at a perversity"

H'm.
Paws


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 10:37 AM

We've just received a letter giving a 'signed mandrake'... I guess someone's spell check is at fault.

LTS


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 11:12 AM

It's one of those days - tortology now with a signed signature!

LTS


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: HouseCat
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 01:44 PM

I was told just the other day that an aquaintance had received serious "eternal injuries" in a car accident. He didn't die so I guess they're no longer eternal.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bill D
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 02:13 PM

I shudder at those (usually IN the military) who confuse 'cache' and caché.

Even more, I shudder at a TV newsreader who states that some force has "wrecked havoc" on someone or something.

There are a couple of ways that 'could' be said ..see here, but wrecked is not one of them.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Cluin
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 04:13 PM

I remember an episode of "All in the Family" where Archie was drunk and dictating his "last will and tentacle" into a tape recorder.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Micca
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 06:14 PM

I knew I'd forgotten one " " He's living in a Menagerie a Trois with 2 women"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Joe_F
Date: 20 Aug 07 - 11:29 PM

Some years ago I heard of a reporter who enlivened the society page of his paper by writing that a marriage had been "consummated on the courthouse steps". (The word he was looking for was "solemnized".)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 21 Aug 07 - 12:32 AM

Micca-- I thought it was only my elderly (now deceased) aunt who referred to certificates as - in her case -- 'cusstificates'...


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 21 Aug 07 - 01:13 AM

In a rather famous "blooper" from the early days of TV, a contestant on one of the early game shows was asked what she did for a living. She replied, quite innocently:
"I'm a maid and I take care of a large family -- 2 boys, 3 girls, one adult and one adultress."

And when I was a child, I used to wonder why "wreckless driving" was considered a bad thing.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: JennyO
Date: 21 Aug 07 - 06:29 AM

Quite a few years ago we had a TV soap in Oz called "Number 96" about the residents of a block of flats. One of the characters was Dorrie Evans, a loudmouthed busybody type of person who was well known for her malapropisms and strange made-up words, such as:

"It's enough to drive a body beresk."

"I prefer to remain ambiguous."

"Pardon me for protruding"

"Don't cast nasturtiums..."

Others I've heard include " I feel like a social piranha", "one foul swoop" (my aunt said that one often), and an intentional one by poet Denis Kevans in his recitation "Concreto" where he says Vasco de Gama "circumcised the world in a Spanish galleon".

And I think this one was in one of the Terry Pratchett books - "We've all passed a lot of water since then".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: JennyO
Date: 21 Aug 07 - 08:57 AM

I was watching Bargain Hunt on TV just now, when the auctioneer introduced the next item for sale as

"Lot number 87 - the monogamy corner chair"!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Mr Happy
Date: 21 Aug 07 - 09:26 AM

On the gameshow 'Catchphrase' a contestant was being given two picture clues, one showing a bottle falling & smashing, & the other of a windmill.

The contestant offered first 'Wind' for part of the phrase, following up with 'Break'.

The host prompted her by saying "Now put the two together"

Her response; 'Break Wind ?


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: HouseCat
Date: 21 Aug 07 - 09:48 AM

Hiatus hernia
Hyena hernia


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Aug 07 - 04:17 PM

I must admit I am an expert at getting things wrong. I still can't remember if the old fashioned sink is a "dublin sink" or a "belfast" sink!!!

Also recently asked if someone's flyers were tat.

A friend from school wrote in her exercise book "seedy fences" when the teacher was talking about "sea defences".
    Please remember to use a consistent name when you post. Messages with the "from" space blank, risk being deleted.
    -Joe Offer-


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: North/South Annie
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 03:17 PM

Years ago my Nanna seeing a guy on the beach with binoculars said 'Look at that man looking through his horoscopes!'

Also, in an infant class a child anounced to the class that '...the long things sticking out of the snails head are called is testicles!'

Annie


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 03:27 PM

How about the kid at school stating that his granddad had "Old Timer's Disease?"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 03:28 PM

Or "the effluent society".... or "a fig of my imagination"...


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: RangerSteve
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 03:57 PM

A western that I read a few years back had a character swear by "Jesus Christ crucified in Calgary".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 06:48 PM

A song has just been inserted into my memory... 'Unchained Malady'.

LTS


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: TheSnail
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 07:49 PM

Reminds me of Molière's famous play - Le Mallard imaginaire.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Ron Davies
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 08:44 PM

The late (and very lamented) My Music--(I'd be happy to listen to repeats forever)--had a couple of good ones you probably remember, if possibly not proper malapropisms.

A boy's favorite part of Messiah: "Come for tea, my people."

And an woman asking in a music store for a record for her nephew: "Something about some trouble over in Bridgewater".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: TheSnail
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 09:00 PM

A boy's favorite part of Messiah

But for the best chorus you only need to omit a word - "We like sheep".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bert
Date: 22 Aug 07 - 11:37 PM

George P.,

I seem to recall that the cartoonist Thelwell published a book of cartoons called "The Effluent Society"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 12:49 AM

Jenny, you can remain ambiguous if you like. I prefer to remain unanimous.
Especially when I'm playing my trampoline in the band.

Sometimes it gets so bad they have to send in the Calvary to the rescue.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST,Neil
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 12:42 PM

When I was a teen I asked my mother for a Pink Floyd album for Christmas. She went into the record store and asked if they had any records by Hot Lloyd. The clerk, bless her heart was able to figure it out and sold her "Wish You Were Here".
   There was a TV Show back in the 70's called "That's Incredible!" A malapropic friend once asked me if I had watched "Thats Incurable" the night before.
   What do you called a word unintentionally formed from two other words. A different friend used to refer to something shocking as being "notrocious".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Wolfhound person
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 02:21 PM

Ron Davies wrote:
"A boy's favorite part of Messiah: "Come for tea, my people."

Isn't that a mondegreen??

Paws


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: katlaughing
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 02:27 PM

Just read this in a sample I was sent to edit:

"He raised his hand in a gesture of posthumous thanks."


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 04:37 PM

Just this morning I heard a talk show caller complain about a TV ad that Bush's former press sec'y Ari Fleisher was running, in which he tries to drum up support for the "surge" in US troops for the 'war' in Iraq.   She remarked, wryly, that this ad, which says something about us needing to "send in the Calvary," was being put out by Fleisher, "who is Jewish."   When queried about why that was relevant, she said it seemed odd that a Jew would be making such a reference to the crucifixion.   
Thom tactfully pointed out that he thought Fleisher probably said "cavalry," and the woman sort of pulled an Emily Latella ("Oh, ... well that's different ... never mind.")

I realize this is more a matter of dyslexia (or its auditory equivalent) than a true malapropism, but it was still pretty funny.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Ron Davies
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 10:33 PM

OK Wolfhound, you got me. I did say it was possibly not an official malapropism. Truth be told, I just wanted to get a chance to cite it--it's just one of my all-time favorite examples of any form of wordplay.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: katlaughing
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 10:52 PM

Guest, Neil, I did this one on purpose because it made my grandson, almost four years old, laugh like crazy:

sneezles = sneezing + sniffles (sort of as that was his condition at the time)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: HouseCat
Date: 24 Aug 07 - 09:24 AM

Just got this in an inter-office email this morning:

"The attitude among our service reps is far too lazy-fair for my tastes."


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Ron Davies
Date: 24 Aug 07 - 10:53 PM

House Cat--you really don't think the writer was trying to make a pun? If not a pun, hoo boy--literacy is decaying even faster than we thought.





Re: My Music: does anybody know if My Music copies can be obtained? It's the all-time best radio program ever, from my perspective. (Jan does not agree).


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: HouseCat
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 12:12 PM

Nah, Ron. The guy who sent that memo really is an idiot. ;~)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 12:37 PM

Then there was the kid who told his teacher his doctor said he had "sick-as-hell anemia."

(I know, I know. It's a mondegreen, not a malapropism.   But it' one o' mah fav'rits.)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 04:50 PM

Many years ago me Ma was stayin' at wor hoose and decided te mek pizza.

She had aall the ingredients except one - She needed some origami te sprinkle on the top!

And did yez knaah...

A pigment of your imagination will sometimes colour your judgement!?


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 04:54 PM

Ye've got a bonny way wi' worrrds, dinna ye?


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: terrier
Date: 25 Aug 07 - 05:56 PM

My mother was explaining to us how my eldest sister accidently reversed her car into some bollocks, made it very hard to keep a straight face.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 02:41 AM

Aye Little Hawk

Aah gerrit from me Mam & Dad.

If ye are hevvin' trouble with me accent try tis

http://www.geordie.org.uk/geordie.htm

Sorry, aah cannit dee the blue clickie thing yet!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bainbo
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 06:23 AM

Theor ye gan, marra


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: JennyO
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 09:16 AM

I used to know a guy who had a black belt in origami.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bill D
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 10:41 AM

"...a black belt in origami."

He won very few matches...he always folded.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 02:17 PM

Groooooaaaannnnn, Bill!

*g*


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 05:53 PM

Black Belt in Origami?

D'ye not mean a black belt in Karachi?

Ma Mam aalwez thought a shitzu was one that didn't have any animals!!


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: terrier
Date: 26 Aug 07 - 07:03 PM

Ma Mam aalwez thought a shitzu was one that didn't have any animals!!

LOL GP, I'd not heard that one.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: JennyO
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 09:51 AM

Shitzu - isn't that some kind of Japanese massage ;-)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: DMcG
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 10:52 AM

I don't want to imply my wife is a constant source of malapropisms, but she wanted to make some damsel jam earlier today ...


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: bfdk
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 03:29 PM

I've heard that in the old days witches were burned at the steaks.. ;-)

Best wishes,

Bente


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 04:08 PM

I worked with someone who repeatedly referred to packages sent by US Mail as "partial post."

I once heard a political pundit on the radio discussing a primary election in which Democrats would be able to vote on the Republican side of the ballot (the Democratic side was uncontested). She said she expected Democrats would "skewer the results."

The director of maintenance at the university where I work gave a short talk describing several repair and renovation projects that were going on this summer. His Power Point slide mentioned a plan to replace a "rod iron fence."


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Stringsinger
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 05:25 PM

I resemble your interference by the use of ambidexterous words. The affect is truly misreprehensive and is the cause of a great sauce of contusions. In the remediate future I would ask that you refine your obligations to preclude the defecations of each one clearly without taking remorse to misleaning tissues. So that these malaproperties can be voluminated, I behest you to state fanatically your invention. It has come to my retention that your mythologies are for the porpoise of misalligning your readers. This said, it is my attention to ratify the defending language by reclusive dialect.

We, as a specious and genius of high calibrate inhumanity, rechoir an intensive collaboration of the foregoing to shed elimination on the abject. It is depressive how so few can be eluded into misappropriate relapses. For this season it is incompetent on me to
refine you that such inflections will not be mistaken slightly.

Ham Frankleton


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Stringsinger
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 05:28 PM

P.S.

Mardon P madame, you are occupewing the wrong pie. Mustaginnit, I will sew you to another sheet.

This would fall into the category of Pralamopisms.

Ham


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Greg B
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 07:39 PM

A lot of business people have, in the last decade, over-used
the phrase 'honing in on.' You don't 'hone in' on something.
You 'home in' on something.

Or you 'hone' your skills, etc.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 27 Aug 07 - 07:52 PM

"anybody know if My Music copies can be obtained"

There have been some books with the famous 'My Word' (same 2 major participants) stories - I seem to remember that there were some BBC cassettes a while ago of a few selected either the Word or Music shows - but they are still broadcast regularly in Australia - not afrequently as they used to be a few years ago.

I'd suggest contacting the BBC website (shop area) - maybe you can ask a question there if they do not show up.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 28 Aug 07 - 04:20 PM

Greg B, re: "Hone/Home"

Hooray! Someone has stood up for truth and justice!

Dave Oesterreich


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bert
Date: 29 Aug 07 - 01:01 AM

Greg B, re: "Hone/Home"

unless of course they meant to say "horn in" which is a different saying altogether.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 29 Aug 07 - 01:59 AM

ROFLMAFAO, Stringsinger!

§;-D

Genie


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST,HiLo
Date: 29 Aug 07 - 11:04 AM

I once knew a maths teacher who warned students not to"conjugate at the water fountain".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms, spoonerisms, mondegreens, etc.
From: Genie
Date: 29 Aug 07 - 12:17 PM

LOL, Stringsinger.

Actually your "Pralamopisms" are "spoonerisms" (named for the Rev. Spooner, who was notorious for saying things like "Jesus, the shoving leopard of his flock").

Oh, and the way I heard that last one was:

"Mardon me, Padame, but you are occupewing the wrong pie. May I sew you to a sheet in the cack of the birch?"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 29 Aug 07 - 06:09 PM

Aah! The biny little tirds!

When aah wez a sailor (like me Da', Bubblyrat) we used te use malapropisms aall the time

Like "... He would say that! That's his tropical altitude (typical attitude)

"It's just a tropical illusion" (Optical)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bert
Date: 29 Aug 07 - 06:34 PM

Don't you mean an optical delusion?


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Stringsinger
Date: 29 Aug 07 - 07:09 PM

Geordie,

There was someone I knew who would say about a self-important person,
"He has the wrong altitude."

Frank


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bill D
Date: 29 Aug 07 - 07:15 PM

I just remembered a guy I used to work with once stepped on a nail, and was afraid to go to the hospital for fear they'd give him one of those 'tenative' shots. (Yes, he even mispronounced the malapropism)


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 30 Aug 07 - 09:21 AM

Not a malapropism, but definitely a wise thing to say to a class of young high school students in the Co-ed Chess Hobby Group...

"I want silence, except when mating!"


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 30 Aug 07 - 05:32 PM

Cheers Bert! Aah like the optical delusion!

Me Uncle Albert was a right comedian and he used te say te me Mam, "Howay wor Jean aa'll teach ye how te dance the Highland Schithoose"

Honest! It's a wonder aah ever learnded te speak Endlandish at aall


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bert
Date: 31 Aug 07 - 12:30 AM

Highland Schithoose... Bwaaaah! I haven't stopped laughing yet.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Hawker
Date: 31 Aug 07 - 06:34 AM

My Mother in law describes people who are Psychotic as Psychic, she has lots more incorrect descriptions, which I cannot remember but it is often impossible to keep a straight face when she is talking.
Cheers, Lucy


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST,HughM
Date: 31 Aug 07 - 08:14 AM

Just seen an advert in which a scientific recruitment agency is asking for a "Regularity Affairs Co-ordinator". I presume they mean "regulatory", or could they be looking for someone to encourage the consumption of more dietary fibre?
    Written by a pupil at our local primary school after a series of lessons on world leaders: "Mussolini was shot and hung upside down in a pizza in Milan".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 31 Aug 07 - 01:12 PM

When aah did me trainin' as a naval meteorologist one of the lads wrote in an exam "...... is a specific weather report for shipping porpoises" instead of purposes

The same guy should have written 'Fracto-stratus', to describe the cloud that gives us drizzle, but he wrote 'Fractus-cactus'

He passed the course anyway and now works for The Met Office in the UK - Aah think he meks the tea


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 31 Aug 07 - 08:28 PM

Yesterday at a church dinner a woman complained that the rice in the casserole wasn't quite done, and I kiddingly said, "It's 'al dente."   The woman laughed and said that her mom gets mixed up and refers to pasta like that as "al detente."


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bainbo
Date: 08 Sep 07 - 05:53 AM

We've just bade farewell at work to a young woman, one of whose endearing qualities was the ability to engage her mouth before putting her brain into gear. Her bon mots were assiduously catalogued by one of her colleagues. The one I can remember that came closest to a malapropism was:

"Are you sure they're called tuxedos? Aren't they what the Germans used to bomb people with?"

Non-malapropisms included: "Do dogs have skin?" and "Tea comes from China - like polar bears."

The same colleague once explained her condition to her in this sympathetic way: "I've come across people before whose mouths work faster than their brains. But in your case, your mouth is doing 70mph the wrong way down the motorway, waving a whisky bottle out of the window, while your brain is still patting its pockets and muttering ' Now, car keys ...' "


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: gnu
Date: 08 Sep 07 - 07:06 AM

Gosh... I just can't remember the name of the American comedian who does so many of these in his acts. Norm ????

The one that sticks out in my mind is, "I resemble that remark."

Crosby??... Norm Crosby?


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Bainbo
Date: 08 Sep 07 - 11:55 AM

Jimmy Durante was prone to them, wasn't he? "That's a tissure of prefabrications".


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Genie
Date: 08 Sep 07 - 01:32 PM

Gnu, yes, Norm Crosby's whole comedic was based on malapropisms.

But "I resemble that remark" goes back decades before him. I can't remember whether it was Groucho Marx or some other mid-20th C. comedian who used to say that all the time, but one of them did.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST,Irene
Date: 08 Sep 07 - 02:52 PM

A friend of mine came up with some cracking inventions.
She had a ton of "Aphrodite" delivered for the open fire. (Anthracite?)
Someone we knew had trouble with "Hermones". That has been quite a useful one.

Just to be an awkward sod, I refer to buying "orgasmic" milk, veg etc, just to watch the victim's eyes unfocus while they think about it.

My mother said that her mother came home from a church meeting, (as an adolescent, I think) mildly hysterical. A woman had been lecturing on mission work in "Lupus Lumpus". We have never worked out where she was talking about.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: Mike Miller
Date: 08 Sep 07 - 04:29 PM

My mother used to say, "Don't make a canary.", which was her mispronouncing of the Yiddish "Keinohera", tempting the evil eye.
That is why, whenevre a Jew says something complimentary, he must temper it with a disclaimer or, at least, by spitting three times.
For instance, he might say, "What a beautiful baby, keinihera." That evil eye is always on the lookout for good looking children.
My ex stumbled into a wonderful spoonerism, some years ago. We were driving past the Wonder Bread bakery, in Conshehocken. She took a deep breath, smiled, and said, "Oh, I love to smell the bed breaking." Hell, who doesn't?


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: gnu
Date: 08 Sep 07 - 07:13 PM

Yes, genie... I googled Norm and it is he. A master! Perhaps I was wrong about the "resemble', but, Norm is the master, as far as i have seen. And, good beyond that... one of the most frequent quotes on variuos websites is about fearing to go to trial with a jury made up of 12 people who were not smart enough to get out of jury duty.


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Subject: RE: Malapropisms
From: GUEST,Bert on Kelly's machine.
Date: 08 Sep 07 - 08:07 PM

Then there is the Cockney habit of deliberately mispronouncing words of three or more syllables.

Had this friend who always called "The Commissary" "The Commissionaire"


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