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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull Date: 02 Oct 07 - 08:34 AM Happy Birthdat Joe |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 01 Oct 07 - 09:19 AM Aye Giok, if the man himself wiz still aboot tae see the 'Muchty Crips' and the 'Auchter Bloods' battering lumps oot each ither oan a Friday night....Och deary me J. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 01 Oct 07 - 04:51 AM Is that the sound of Jimmy Shand birlin' in his grave that I hear? G. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 30 Sep 07 - 07:46 PM Nuthin, not a stitch, na da, in the buff, lettin it awe hing oot, unless his leopard skin print thong counts... *wink* Listen Giok, if taking a wee donner doon the "casting couch" road wi Marty Boy gets oor Joe a nice second hand Support and me a starring role in Marty's next film: "The Gangs of Auchermuchty" it's worth it so it is..:) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 30 Sep 07 - 05:28 PM If Martin gave you his support, what's he wearing Jude? G. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 30 Sep 07 - 05:21 PM Thanks you very much Ms Kitty Laughing *VBG* I couldn't have done it without my fellow collaborator, The one and only Giok ~ Caretaker of the Bonnie Hameland ~ (who brought me back from the brink of Bru'!) Since am here, I'd like to thank my Dog, Barney the Wonder Hound, Shop n' Shop groceries stores and of course Martin Scorsese for the support. I was jist thinkin that the mighty 'O' probably cannae see his keyboard tae type a wee message fir the tears rolling doon his coupon. Whit dae yi think Giok eh..dinnae know aboot yersel but a huv a lump in ma throat jist thinkin aboot it so a huv! Sometimes,just sometimes, silence says a lot more than words could ever say. It's ok Joe, we know, we know |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: katlaughing Date: 30 Sep 07 - 03:52 PM Fucking brilliant, Jude!! One of the best b-day threads ever!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 30 Sep 07 - 12:18 PM An aw ra best frae me an a' Joe. Mind ah'm no promisin' that ah willnae, stairt anither threed, efter a' there's anither eleeven months tae gang afore we hae anither burst o' Joe joy, and love. Mebbes we kin stairt an ante birth month in July next year eh? There ye go bonnie laddie, whit dae ye think tae thon bricht idea? Ah kin hear thonn gratefu' sobs in Californi-ay a' ra wey frae here. OK pal, that's a deal. See you, see me, see thon wee Maine Glaswegian, we're a team so we are. HBBM Joe. Giok |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 30 Sep 07 - 10:43 AM Oh well Mr. Joe. My heart is heavy. It has been a month of....how shall I put it, good wishes and expressions of caring. I know that this particular thread and your other 'Unbirthday Thread' has made you very, very happy indeed. {I signed the papers agreeing to stop harassing you and sent them back to your Lawyer. The timing of being served with those documents was...uncanny. Just as well the wheels of Justice go round and round so slowly or I would have had to miss a few posts while awaiting a bond hearing.} So all is well that ends well. I hope this has been, for you, the best Un~Birthday Month you have EVER had and I wish you at least another ten Un~ Birth Months ahead. I will end my Month long quest to bring You Happiness with a Song O' Mighty Joe 'O' and it goes like this: From "The Sound of Music" Words by Oscar Hammerstein 2nd Music by Richard Rodgers Absolute liberties taken by: Jude aka Alba So Long, Farwell ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There's a sad sound of banging from my Head on the Wall and from my nails on the Keyboard too. Up in the Bellfry an absurd the little Bat Keeps telling me that I'm Cuckoo,! "yeah you are cuckoo" Regretfully Lawyers tell me But FIRMLY they compel me To say goodbye.... or they'll sue! So long, farewell, Auf wiedersehen, Bye bye, I hate to go and leave this pretty sight. So long, farewell, Auf wiedersehen, adieu, Adieu, adieu, to yieu Joe, yieu Joe,YIEU! So long, farewell, Au'voir, auf wiedersehen, I'd like to stay and but that might fry my brain So long, farewell, Auf wiedersehen, goodbye, I sob and cry it's hard to say goodbye, Good bye I'm sad to go, I cannot tell a lie. I wail, I scream, My Doctor's asking why!!!. The thread is going to bed, I heave a heavy sigh. So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye! Jude! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 29 Sep 07 - 08:07 AM Something's running down my leg, I hope it's sweat! Such an emotional post deserves to be saved for posterior Jude. I will arrange to have it engraved in stone. Along with the name of the immortal Joe Offer. "You are old, father Offer," the young man said, "And your hair has become very white; And yet you incessantly stand on your head-- Do you think, at your age, it is right?". Well if Jude can quote, so can I Giok HBBM Joe. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 29 Sep 07 - 07:29 AM Well Joe, only 2 to go and this is one of them. This BBM has flown by..I mean one minute is was the beginning of the Month and here we are 29 days later nearly at the end, hanging onto September by the skin of our teeth....amazing huh! So I thought today's little Happy Belated Birth Month message should come with a little something. I settled on a quote (now is that spelt correctly, I had it as qoute and it just didn't look right but neither does quote, does that ever happen to you Joe) anyway as I was saying I settled on a quote because Ferrari's are so damn expensive. This is the one that came to mind.. It takes a long time to become young. Pablo Picasso Makes me think that perhaps a Joe Offer's Birth Day 2008 Thread could begin where this one stops? mmmm Well , till tomorrow O' Keeper of the Cat, Happy Belated Birth Month *sniff* Jude |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 28 Sep 07 - 11:20 AM This is not the ultimate thread, nor is it the penultimate thread, it's not even the ante penultimate thread. How does it feel to be held in such high esteem oh mighty Offer? Giok |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: MMario Date: 28 Sep 07 - 10:37 AM I can't believe I've missed this thread for almost a month! A very Happy Belated birthmonth, Joe! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 28 Sep 07 - 10:26 AM Goood Morningggg O' Nippy one! It's Friday, It's the 28th of September and there are only two days left of your BBM thread...sadly. I promise you however that the last two days of this BBM will be...unforgetable..!!. Let the Countdown begin....3 A VERY Happy Belated Birthmonth Mr.O. *Wild Grin* Jude |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 27 Sep 07 - 03:29 PM Why does Joe need a support, has he got some medical condition we know not of? Have you blown all your candles out yet Joe, or did the heat from them burning set the fire sprinklers off, and put them out for you? HBBM Oh first gentleman of Mudcat! Giok |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 27 Sep 07 - 07:27 AM woopee doo ~ Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee HA! Time for some reflection. Can nearly a whole month have flown by since it was your Birth Day last Month...who knows maybe we have passed the actual Day a month on but not to worry...it is THE THOUGHT that counts. So Joe. Sadly there are not too many days left of this Your Belated Birth Month Thread ..*sigh* but you can breath a sigh of relief that I will be walking through those last few days of your 'BBMT', supplying you with the support you need. Happy BBM J.O. ~ O' Mighty King of the Keys Jude :) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 26 Sep 07 - 09:36 AM Bungeeeeeeee ..and like magic the thread sprang back up to the top and lived happily ever till tomorrow. Happy Belated BirthMonth O' mighty 'O' Is that tears of joy I see coming down your face Joe ma dear? There, there. Alba cares..*Manic Grin* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work Date: 26 Sep 07 - 05:53 AM Why do I keep reading this as Happy Belated Behemoth Joe Offer? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 26 Sep 07 - 05:46 AM I won't second that motion Spaw. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: catspaw49 Date: 25 Sep 07 - 06:39 PM Have a Big Bowel Movement???? Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 25 Sep 07 - 10:45 AM I feel I must support my fellow Glaswegian, and all round super person in her efforts to keep Joe's chin off the floor. SO Giok |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 25 Sep 07 - 09:13 AM TA DA You thought I had forgetten....happily no Joe. I found YOUR Happy Belated Birthmonth Thread lurking like a tiny criminal just below the page. No probs and no need to thank me. Really no need. Just doing my job O' High Heid Big Yin....*grin* Jude |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 24 Sep 07 - 08:17 AM You forgot modest Jude¦¬] HBBM Quiejo numero uno. Giok |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 24 Sep 07 - 08:02 AM Swooooooooooooooooooooooop, Caught ya. Yip it was just hanging by a thread..(haha)...to the bottom of the page when I grabbed it and pushed it back onto solid ground. As I have said and will continue to say.. (you will be happy to hear no doubt).. Never fear, Nurse Alba's here! Happy Belated Birthmonth O' Keeper of the Key (board) aka The one and only Mr. Offer. My work for the day here is done, now it is onto other less important matters...* said with a casual but charming smile* Jude |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 23 Sep 07 - 09:46 AM He is the original Sanity Clause Jude. HBBM Joe. G. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 23 Sep 07 - 09:16 AM Well jings, cribbins and help ma bob! I awoke to the sound of a big thud this morning. Know what it was? It was your Belated Birth Month Thread falling of the page Joe. Never fear. Nurse Alba is here. Happy Belated Birth Month O'Keeper of the Sanity (aka Mr. Offer ) Jude..*smile* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 22 Sep 07 - 08:56 AM ROFL Och Giok, a cannae believe a huv been such a slacker. Whit wiz a thinkin, whit will the the High Heid Yin think! Gie us wan mare chance Giok. See me, av never been tae the Bru in my life! too old for that noo. This is a wumman on a mission. Jist came oot o' a refocus group meeting wae masel. Target: The big Kahuna's belated birth Month Thread. Right Giok...am back and on track! See me, am pure gallus so a um and so ur you Giok. Thanks for watchin back pal. Happy belated Birth Month Mr. Offer...*Big Cheezee Smile* Very Sincerly, Jude (hoping tae keep her Jotters!) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 22 Sep 07 - 06:50 AM Hey therr Alba hen, whit are ye daein' lettin' this threed lowse tae sink aff ra bottom o' the page wi'oot postin' onything? Ah think it's time ye got yer jotters, and sent doon the bru, ye hae negleckit yer duties wumman. Ontweys. Happy belated no longer your bithmonth Joe Offer. Hee hee, see me, ah'm evil so ah am! G. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: autolycus Date: 12 Sep 07 - 05:35 AM My turn to show how funny I-I-I-I-I am. Of course Joe knows we love him. he's rather good AT IT, BEING A lEO. (Whoops) I just wanted tosay in mock-postmodern deconstrontion mide, that owing to never having heard of you until a coupla beers ago, and a rather empty diary at the time, that I shan't be apologising for having missed saying happy birthday, what's it like being 13?, and I hope you had the one you wanted. Whatever their name was. Look-no-smileys Ivor (COYS) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 12 Sep 07 - 04:27 AM Awa an' dinnae fash yersel Joe ma auld china. It'll be anither 11 months fornent ye hae anither ane, sae mak the best o't laddie while ye hae the chance.Whit wid ye dae if ye hudnae us yins tae, gie ye carniptions wi a' the fa'ing oot an rudeness we post, jist tae keep ye busy. It widnae dae fur ye tae hae time tae yersel laddie, ye micht get intae mischief. ¦¬] Onyweys, a verra happy unbirthday oh HIgh Heid Yin. Giok |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Joe Offer Date: 12 Sep 07 - 01:21 AM I haven't had a birthday in at least a fortnight. Don't I deserve to be ignored? -Joe Offer- |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 11 Sep 07 - 08:02 PM Dinae fret Giok, am no deid a' wiz jist workin fir a change!!....LOL Right now back to Business. I see that your "Unbirthday Thread" has been kept going but this, your Birthmonth Thread, had tried to get lost in the archives of Mudcat History. Joe! Never fear Alba's here. (twitching, tick, mad grin, grinding of teeth) I have been chopping down ma hayfield, bailing and storing said hay and doing all things Farm like in nature but now...all toil is done in that department ~ tada. Yes I can devote myself Daily to your belated Birthmonth Thread once more Joe. I REALLY REALLY HOPE I have made your un~Birthday Month Day Mr Offer. Is that the sound of tears of joy I hear coming from your neck of the woods Joe?....My task here is done. Jude |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 06 Sep 07 - 03:55 PM Gosh Joe, you nearly slid off the bottom there my old friend. I hope you are having another unbirthday to remember, and don't forget Alba is just dying to send you her best wishes. Giok |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 05 Sep 07 - 10:46 PM Daily refresher... 5 days down and yes I am still counting Joe. Happy belated Birth Month Mr Offer. Can't have you thinking that WE simply don't care, Because truly, you know Joe, that wouldn't be fair. {plus the fact I know, deep down, how much you really do like Birth Day Threads} Jude (who now has, without a shadow of a doubt, developed a nervous tic and this grin is beginning to look very dodgy....if you catch my drift! Hey Giok see me a wid be the first tae admit that I might huv a coupon oan me like wee Grey friars Bobbie but geez a break. You mentioned Lassie. Huv yi checked out the size o' the beak oan yon dug? See me, see that dug, a look nuthin like that dug *giggle* x |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 05 Sep 07 - 05:43 AM Ur ye sair that's a grin oan yer coupon lassie, an' no a snarl, efter a' ye did compare yersel wi a wee dug. Onyweys ah think thon wis jist a PR exercise fur Skye Terriers. Oh BTW. Happy belated birthmonth Joe. Giok ¦¬] ;~) <¦-)> 8~{|> |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 04 Sep 07 - 10:02 PM Daily refresher... 4 days down and still counting Joe. Can't seem to STOP thinking about your belated Birth month thread Joe but it is worth it because I know this thread must be bringing you unspeakable joy. That is my aim. To MAKE you happy Mr.Offer Jude (who seems to be developing a nervous tic but still holding that mad grin in place...for now) LOL Giok, they don't call me Grey Friars Judi fir nuthin |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 04 Sep 07 - 05:54 AM Aye lassie ye're a wee terrier so ye are. Happy unbirthday Joe. Giok |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 03 Sep 07 - 09:55 PM Daily refresher... 3 days down and counting Joe. Thinking of you! Jude...( now twiching slightly but holding fast to the mad Grin ) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 02 Sep 07 - 10:54 PM Daily refresher... Now what is that Calendar thingy saying. Oh yeah. 30 days has September, April ect ect. 2 days down and counting Joe. Jude..*Manic Grin* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Joe Offer Date: 02 Sep 07 - 05:41 AM Well, hell, if you people are still talking about this, let me tell you about the vacation I had back in 1997. I went to my parent's 50th wedding anniversary party in Florida, and then I went up to the Great Smoky Mountains, where my folks had gone on their honeymoon. By my fingers-and-toes calculations, I figure that's where I was conceived, exactly 50 years earlier. I suppose some people go back to their birthplace to celebrate when and where they were born. But hey, how many of you have any idea where you were conceived? Well, let me tell you, I was conceived in a wonderful place. What's that? You don't care to know???? -Joe- And Spaw, I have a message for you in this thread....and don't you DARE start a thread marking the 60th anniversary of my conception. I don't want to know where that discussion would lead.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: catspaw49 Date: 01 Sep 07 - 04:01 PM Effacing? Is that some way of calling someone a "fuckface?" Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Bill D Date: 01 Sep 07 - 01:10 PM humble?? Joe ain't humble...he's 'self-effacing' |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: catspaw49 Date: 01 Sep 07 - 12:52 PM I dunno' Bill........Talk about your self-aggrandizement. Look at what he did! Imagine the gall. To start your own thread GROUP........words just aren't enough to express my disdain for such a person....and the guy always tries to pump the "humble" line ...................... Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Bill D Date: 01 Sep 07 - 12:47 PM we don't really NEED "The Mother of All Birthday Threads".....I think Joe is convinced we love him... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 01 Sep 07 - 12:12 PM What does he do when he counts past 21? G. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: katlaughing Date: 01 Sep 07 - 11:59 AM Well, some of us had to stick around and couldn't go gallivanting off during the hottest, m*****f******* month of the year, so we didn't miss the Happy bygawd birthMONTH thread but I am SO glad to see Spaw AND Alba back here, I just had to use THIS Joe thread to say so! Joe, are you still counting fingers and toes? luvya'll! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: John MacKenzie Date: 01 Sep 07 - 11:38 AM Da Spaw has spoke, an' we humble acolytes bow and scrape in admiration and wonderment. All hail the Spawzer !! Giok Nice to see you back my friend. ¦¬] |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: catspaw49 Date: 01 Sep 07 - 10:52 AM I have had it!!!! Great Christ on a fockin' crutch!!! For years I have tried to support you Joe. I know your supposed hatred of ANY birthday thread for a variety of reasons and specifically because they tend to say just the same old things. In trying to ease what I believed to be your suffering, your angst, over this I posted to almost all of them with a different message guaranteed to make the thread "different." Over the years I have told various wonderful folks to fuck off, get bent, bite me, kiss my ass, etc., for absolutely no other reason than to relieve your troubled mind. Well you can just fuck off, get bent, bite me, kiss my ass, and take a hot lead enema to boot. You really are a sleaze and a lying sack of shit. You love these damn threads! No need to admit it because its obvious. We can all see what you've done and it is so pathetic and self-serving that I don't know how I can ever respect anything of yours again. YOU HAVE CREATED YOUR OWN GROUP OF JOE'S BIRTHDAY THREADS!?!?!? You're pathetic......talk about your broke-dick mamaluccas............Man, you really take the cake. Don't send me any apologies you fockin' weasel. I will be forwarding this message on to Shambles as I know this is what he expected of you and will be relieved to see himself vindicated. He is of course a complete asshole himself but now he will be an asshole with a smile. Blow me Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: JennyO Date: 01 Sep 07 - 10:48 AM I wonder who that smartass was? Meanwhile..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Jeri Date: 01 Sep 07 - 10:34 AM I'd like to say I noticed the smartass that created a grouping for Joe and his birth-thingie. Nice touch! Alba, I agree. Maybe there should be a note in the FAQ. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Alba Date: 01 Sep 07 - 10:23 AM "Maybe you could celebrate through September too, just so I don't have to feel so guilty." Well said Jeri. I too am riddled with guilt at having missed Joe's actual day and then only just getting in the door at the Month end of his unbirthday Month Thread. I say let's simply celebrate Joe's Year ahead with a daily post or two to this and his unbirthday thread letting him know that we all care, whacha think Jeri? Warmest Wishes for a very Happy belated Birth Month Joe Offer Jude |
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Subject: BS: Happy Belated Birthmonth Joe Offer!!! From: Jeri Date: 01 Sep 07 - 09:26 AM I'm appalled at myself! I see there's a thread about Joe's Birthmonth, and one about an 'Unbirthday' (whatever that is!), but I somehow missed both of those threads until this very day, so I'm late. Joe, I hope you had a nice Birthmonth. If I knew the actual day, I could have just posted 'Happy Belated BirthDAY', but as it is, a month is a long time to spend being born (your mother undoubtedly harbored a lot of resentment about that) and so I thought a new thread was in order. After all, there are some who've been elsewhere during August or just haven't joined yet, and they need someplace to post too! Have a nice month-after. Maybe you could celebrate through September too, just so I don't have to feel so guilty. |
