BS: It wasn't a skunk...

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: katlaughing
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 12:24 AM

Well done, Bente! LOL.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 11:38 PM

Sins -- I trust the stink will have totally gone by tomorrow......??? We had a dog - not Asha - who was skunked. My daughter, who adores all living creatures who are non human - let the dog into the house.......$500 of dry cleaning bills. And then I was interviewing for a new job that day -- had to call in and say I couldn't make it because I stank.....remote proximity to the dog was enough. Nasty.....

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: bfdk
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 06:43 PM

Auntie Mary's Skunk

There was an old skunk and he lived in a lair
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
Down underneath aunt Mary's stair
A nice easy life he's leadin'

The skunk one day went walkabout
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
Saw old Seamus looking out
Decided to do some teasin'

Up jumps Seamus, barking at the door
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
Up jumps Mary from her snore
Rushes to do his pleasin'

He raced down the stairs to her great dismay
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
The skunk turned tail and released his spray
Hit bull's eye, he was succeedin'

Poor Seamus sat down on his bum
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
Believe you me, he looked quite numb
Discomfort was fast increasin'

He rolled to the left and he rolled to the right
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
Bounded back up, with a squeeze so tight
In through the door he's easin'

He ran through the kitchen and he jumped on a chair
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
Aunt Mary tearing at her hair
After the pupper speedin'

She washed him with vinegar, she washed him with soap
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
Walked him on a ten yard rope
The odeur was far from pleasin'

With wat'ry eyes and heaving chest
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
She gave the cleaning all her best
Alas, she was not succeedin'

Poor Seamus now plays solitaire
Sniffin', coughin' sneezin'
The skunk is back inside his lair
Curled up to stop him freezin'

(To the tune: Weila Waila)

Bente
(off to board up the mailbox and barricade the door before the dryer lint-and-glue extravaganzas start arriving)

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: katlaughing
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 04:53 PM

Sins, if it makes you feel any better, I just caught Kipling peeing in our bathtub! This after weeks of keeping the door closed, then trusting them enough to start leaving it open for the past 3-4 weeks, and how does he repay me? Never again shall I trust the chocolate/cream mog!

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 04:49 PM

That was my thought, Becca. He is terrified of Ed so why chase a black/white "cat"?
Rapaire,
To ad insult to injury, I called Jacqui today and made it clear that Seamus is not welcome tomorrow night. A real slap in the face given that Tami's Bandit was here today and wallowing in the cat food. He is welcome for Friday AM breakfast, should he choose.
Auntie SINS

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Becca72
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 04:33 PM

"Since Seamus is the biggest coward ever that should deter him from going anywhere near anything black and white and furry ever again."

one would have thought that Ed would already have accomplished this if it was going to work. :-)

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 04:29 PM

Please notice that I haven't contributed to this thread for some time. Now that Sins has foisted Seamus off on poor Kendall and Jacqui I find that I have little or no sympathy for her. Imagine...making your friends take a skunk-spattered dog into their home, instead of keeping it at your place! What sort of friend is it that makes their friends suffer, I ask you? Remember the biblical injunction that "Greater love no woman hath than this, to endure skunk for her friends."

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 04:22 PM

Update.
I brought in some groceries in the usual plastic bags and left them on the floor in the kitchen. When I returned, Alice was squatting contentedly over the bags. I shouted; she ran; puddle on the clean floor.
But then I found a track of drips from the door to the kitchen. Leave it to me to buy a leaky soup can. So the house now has the homey smell of chicken soup. An improvement actually. But now Alice is angry with me for accusing her (IMAGINE!) of peeing on the groceries.
I lurch from one crisis to another (or one teapot tempest to another, more accurately).

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: jacqui.c
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 03:02 PM

No Peace

What Seamus is getting for Christmas is a full size toy skunk with just enough electrical charge to give him a nip when he touches it. Since Seamus is the biggest coward ever that should deter him from going anywhere near anything black and white and furry ever again.

Now all I've got to do is find that toy or work out how to make one.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 02:57 PM

This is for Seamus at Christmas.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 02:54 PM

SINSULL is right,. It's time to stop. This will help take your mind off the whole incident.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 02:51 PM

You two have been yanking my chain all week. Be careful...very careful.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:48 PM

Memories for SINSULL.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:22 PM

Well Funky Skunky Mary, do what Peace suggests, dial 911 and ask them to send an ambiance.
G.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:17 PM

Note to Kendall and Jacqui: No. Seamus is NOT welcome tomorrow night.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:17 PM

I repeat - I hate you all.
Meantime Tami stopped by to help with a simple project which turned into Project Mercury (predictably) very quickly. She said she smelled cat food but not skunk.
Sunroom is still a little funky.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: jacqui.c
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 12:34 PM

Shame we can't get Pont l'Eveque cheese - totally without any competition in the smelly stakes.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Micca
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 12:32 PM

Stinking in the rain
On Golden pong?
Smellhound (rather than Spellbound)
Smellville

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: maeve
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 12:30 PM

So, Sinsull, anyone who is fortunate enough to visit your home for tomorrow's concert simply needs to bring delicious foods with strong aromas; garlic, stinky cheeses, herbs, lemon, cabbage with onions...

"What skunk smell?"

maeve, who hopes to be there with an appropriately stinky and delicious food

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Becca72
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 12:09 PM

"Smellraiser"   BAHahahaha good one, Liz.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 10:10 AM

Sort of like 'Dial M for Musky'?

'The 39 Scents'?

'Smellraiser'?

I'll get me coat...

And sorry Sins, but it just doesn't have the same ring when you type it... I can HEAR Kendall saying it, but you? - not so much.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 10:00 AM

Makings of a movie here.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 09:32 AM

It could smell like both....

Just tell the visitors that there's a decaying corpse around somewhere and the police are still trying to find it. It'll give the place a certain cachet...wait, it already has that doesn't it? Well, tell them that you buried the body of the last person who played out of tune in the basement.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: ranger1
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 09:14 AM

Could be worse, Mary. Could smell like dog farts. I'll take skunk musk over dog farts any day. not that I want either, understand.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 11:06 AM

Ambiance is the key.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 11:03 AM

A Pooftah! He will love it.
Guests coming tomorrow and my house still smells funky. Add air freshener and it smells like a public restroom.
Beautiful! Fuckin' beautiful!

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:47 AM

Them's rough streets for a Labrador in a cardigan . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: jacqui.c
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 08:10 AM

We've got him back and he smells very musky right now, earning the nickname of Stinky.

This is where you find out how much you love your dog. We will live with the pong in the house and car for however long it takes, although I have warned him that if he tries it again he will end up being taken to a sheep shearer and then he'll have to wear a crocheted dog coat until his fur grows back in.

A nice pink and mauve coat, maybe?

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 03:34 AM

Oh labs are fab! They are one of the most loyal dogs, complete goofballs, dustbin dogs, and sneaky cheeky chewy dogs. I love them, they are wee dafties.

Saw a gor curly coated brown one the other day. awwww

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 10:12 PM

Today, before Kendall and Jacqui came to pick him up, poor Seamus was sitting at my feet looking pathetic. I thought he wanted to go out so I got up, opened the door and turned to call him - he was lounging in my chair. No eye contact. SIGH!

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Sorcha
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 09:57 PM

LOL, Jeri...what can I say? He's a Lab.......He LOVES everbuddy! (Well, nearly....)

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Jeri
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 06:55 PM

I love Seamus, and he's smarter than the average dog, but...

Big old yellow goofball dog
If you'd only thunk
You might not have chased that skunk
After which you stunk
Big old yellow goofball dog

Big old yellow goofball dog
You're looking kinda sick
Quills in you do stick
He got humped, you got the prick
Big old yellow goofball dog

Uh... maybe not.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 04:53 PM

Thanks, Jeri. Betcha he makes friends with the skunks. Whether or not they make friends with him . . . that's to find out.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Jeri
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 04:46 PM

Seamus is a Lumbering Yellow Goofball dog.

(Lab)

Personally, I think the seafood industry in Maine is heading for a terrible few months.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 04:41 PM

What kinda dog is Seamus, other than a stinky one?

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: ranger1
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 04:36 PM

Poor skunk. Imagine the fright it received when that great, lumbering, yellow goofball stampeded at it. And Mary, for Seamus to smell that strong, he had to have gotten nailed directly in the face.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: jacqui.c
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 02:40 PM

LOL Peace.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 11:08 AM

"Seamus, I believe, has learned his lesson."

In the parlance, "You say so, mano."

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Peace
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 11:03 AM

"On that basis I will be taking him to the beach every day this week and letting him get wet, whether he ends up smellier or not. Hopefully, after a few good soakings, the smell will dissipate and the boy won't miss out on his exercise."

Sounds like a great idea, Jacqui. Do the same for Seamus.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 10:29 AM

No! No! No!
The skunk stays. Tami and i discussed this. It is too late in the season for it to find a safe home so he stays. In the spring after the baby skunks are safely grown I will deal with it humanely. Bright lights and a loud radio dropped down the hole while he is out will get him to move on but probably not far enough. Animal Control will have to get him. Then the burrow will be filled in with concrete.

Seamus, I believe, has learned his lesson. Last night he went out and started for the skunk's hole. I heard TWO skunks rattling and chattering at him. He looked at me sheepishly and came back inside. But he is fascinated by the smelly spot in the yard.

He doesn't smell bad until you rough up his fur. It's in there. The first time you dry him after a swim you'll notice, jacqui.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 09:31 AM

Live trap it. Then call Animal Control to remove it.

(Did you know that Skunk Stew is delicious? You might consider a big pot of Skunk Stew the next time some folks come by for an evening. It's usually made with skunks who didn't quite make it across the road, but it's even better with fresh skunk. Just remember to remove all the scent glands when you field dress it. Mmmmmmmmm...makes me...hungry...just thinking about it. 'Scuse me, I gotta go and ah, well, I gotta go.)

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 09:25 AM

Shoot it?????
What the fook happened to live and let live?
G

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 09:17 AM

Try the tomato ketchup and let me know!!!

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: jacqui.c
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 08:38 AM

OK - devotion to my furry charge. I reckon that he's going to need his exercise, stinky or not and he does love swimming, which is so good for him.

I love this dog almost as much as I love his master. On that basis I will be taking him to the beach every day this week and letting him get wet, whether he ends up smellier or not. Hopefully, after a few good soakings, the smell will dissipate and the boy won't miss out on his exercise.

I'm also going to try and persuade Kendall to go shoot the skunk - otherwise Seamus is just going to go after it again next time he visits Mary! :0)

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 04:02 AM

Haaaa haaaaa LTS,

AND Horse poo can be a fave too. my friends two terriers enjoy Fox poop (could be their breeding). I used to know a collie that would eat horse pucky - apparantly it's good for them...

eiwwwwwwwww!

The worst I've seen a dog do is eat cat poop - ewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewew

!

EWIS

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Ruth Archer
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 03:59 AM

Our border collie loved sheep poo. Rolling in it, yes, but especially eating it. He kind of licked at it like it was a lolly, and it was very hard to persuade him to stop.

So wrong.

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 03:48 AM

I beg to differ... my aunt's dog Laddie would forgo fox turds for cow pats, despite both being available.

His favourite, and he had a knack for sniffing them out, were the ones that look dry but turn to a putrid green gurp of goo when a foot is placed firmly into the top. He would bounce onto these and proceed to roll over in it, working it into his shoulders all the way down his spine to his hips which he would waggle in a most suggestive way, to achieve greatest distribution.

He would then jump into the van or car and grin in a most endearing manner before distributing dog snot and cowshit in equal quantites to all passengers.

Fox turds he would pee on.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 03:38 AM

oVer here a firm favourite for dogs to roll in to smell of eau de poo is fox poop. They just love it. They roll on top of it, rub themselves in it, and generally get a really good dousing of the eau de fox toilette and then stand triumphant in their pong.

They honk! They reeek, it makes you sick. But the best thing to get rid of it is...

Tomato Ketchup (red sauce) - throw it on and wipe it off...

It might work for skunk?

Best of luck

Ewis

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 07 Oct 07 - 10:58 PM

I'm curious. Is the dog a blonde now that the peroxide-baking soda treatment has been applied? Or does it just have golden highlights?

Can you make its eyes sparkle by shining a flashlight in its ear?

Subject: RE: BS: It wasn't a skunk...
From: Sorcha
Date: 07 Oct 07 - 10:08 PM

Then, Sins...he/she was YOUR pet skunk! LOL....I know, you HATE ME! hee hee!

I'm sorry, Sins..I really do know this isn't fun. Been there.