BS: Most stupid last thing people have said

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Oct 07 - 12:11 AM

Ouch! Can you describe what it was like being in a plane struck by lightning?

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Canberra Chris
Date: 26 Oct 07 - 08:51 PM

On a very nasty final descent into Heathrow Airport in appalling weather, the plane was struck by lightning. My only concern at the time was to come up with my last one-liner. It did make my travelling companion laugh, but I can't for the life of me remember what it was.

Chris

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Oct 07 - 07:04 PM

"And so is this gas can..."

"Say, I can't see what level the battery fluid is at here. Anyone got a match or a lighter handy?"

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Oct 07 - 06:58 PM

SHEE-it, that ol' tank car is empty!

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Oct 07 - 05:31 PM

"You're mistaken, Don/Ron/Teribus/Bearded Bruce/etc...and that is definitely the last word on the matter, because I know there is nothing further you can possibly think of to rebut what I have said." ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: folk1e
Date: 26 Oct 07 - 03:41 PM

"You and who's army?"

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: bubblyrat
Date: 26 Oct 07 - 03:07 PM

I KNOW that Waylon has had some misgivings, but I"m telling y"all, flying is real safe nowadays ! ( Buddy Holly )

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Greg B
Date: 25 Oct 07 - 05:23 PM

They say the most common two words uttered prior to a fatal
small airplane accident are 'Watch this!'

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: kendall
Date: 25 Oct 07 - 04:32 PM

Natural selection?

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 24 Oct 07 - 05:38 PM

"I wonder if I could use this bullet to replace that headlight fuse..."

A genuine one this, and it won the moron a Darwin award, despite the fact that he survived.

Seems he removed himself from the human gene pool because the fuse holder was aligned directly with his reproductive bits.

Makes yer eyes water just thinking about it.

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Mrrzy
Date: 23 Oct 07 - 09:48 PM

No, it's not Oh Shit here in the South - it's "Hey Bubba! Watch this!"

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: kendall
Date: 23 Oct 07 - 09:39 PM

Brain surgeon..."Ooops."

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Oct 07 - 01:30 PM

"EEEE-YAAAAAUUUUAAAAARGHHHH!!!!!!!!"

(uttered by numerous hunters and other such people who have made the mistake of bothering a grizzly bear, a lion, a tiger...) Now, I don't know if it's precisely a stupid thing to say or not, but it is generally the last thing they say.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Oct 07 - 09:30 AM

Oh, fer chrissakes! It's a garage and it's St. Valentine's day! What can happen?

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: kendall
Date: 23 Oct 07 - 09:19 AM

"I can lick any number of Indians." George A. Custer.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Oct 07 - 10:06 PM

I wonder how they make a profit on this stuff at four bucks a quart....

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Alba
Date: 22 Oct 07 - 09:43 PM

I wonder where the mother bear is?

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 08:32 PM

Don't tell ME what to do!

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 08:29 PM

Hell, it's intuitive with me. I don't need to read the instructions.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 08:01 PM

I know what I'm doing.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Amos
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 06:31 PM

"Hell, don't be so chicken...it's just a little nitro."

"I wonder if I could use this bullet to replace that headlight fuse..."



A

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 06:03 PM

Here, let ME show you how to use dynamite!

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 05:31 PM

Yeah...I figure that "Oh, SHIT!!!" is definitely the most common last statement around, at least in the English language.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: folk1e
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 05:29 PM

Oh Sh1t!

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Midchuck
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 12:48 PM

"I'll hold the nail, and when I nod my head, you hit it with the hammer."

Peter.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST,Ed
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 11:41 AM

We need some kindling.
I'll hold this stick, if you cut it up with the axe.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: frogprince
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 11:36 AM

"Damn the torpedos, full speed ahead!"

Having served a hitch in the Navy, I've long suspected that that quote may have been softened from the original "Fuck the torpedoes.."

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Bill D
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 11:12 AM

"Damn the torpedos, full speed ahead!"

                -Admiral Farragut


except it worked! ....well, except for one ship...

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Donuel
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 10:53 AM

Do it for God and Country.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: frogprince
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 10:39 AM

""Watch me beat that train to the crossing..""
One of my uncles died very young, before my time, in the remains of a Hupmobile; those may very well have been his last words.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Waddon Pete
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 06:12 AM

Hello...great thread!

"I feel better now!" (quoted by Spike Milligan)

"That's that...bears live in caves!"

"Now this is the Total War button... and this one next to it is the door to the washroom. Or is it the other way around?" (Both by cartoonist, Styx).

Best wishes,

Peter

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 03:19 AM

What fucking iceberg ? [ Captain of the Titanic ]

eric

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 02:01 AM

"Watch me beat that train to the crossing..."

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST,Ed
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:26 PM

Don't worry about how long it was in the fridge or the best before date, it's fine to eat.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST,Ed
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:25 PM

Could I have my hamberger rare?

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST,Ed
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:24 PM

Who ever gets down to the ski lodge last buys a round of beers

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST,Ed
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:22 PM

I never use those safety harnesses, they just get in the way

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:14 PM

Just tie the pop-off valve down and we can beat that other boat, sure!

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:12 PM

Hold on,I tkink we can make it

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 09:06 PM

I wonder how he would have felt if he'd lived long enough to hear Rap and Heavy Metal?

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Art Thieme
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 09:05 PM

The doctor asked the great jazz drummer, Buddy Rich, "Buddy, is anything bothering you?" Buddy answered, "Country music!"====and he died!

That's for real!

Art

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 09:01 PM

It's people who don't forgive. Trust me.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST,JTT
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 09:00 PM

Heinrich Heine, asked on his deathbed if he thought God would forgive all his great sins:

"Mais oui, c'est son metier!"

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 08:54 PM

No need to go through all the trouble of putting the boom down...we're only driving across the road, and we won't be anywhere NEAR the high-voltage lines.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST,Ed
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 06:08 PM

So the can is swolen,with a big bump on the side, Big deal. I've eaten food from cans like this plenty of times before. Trust me, there's nothing wrong with it.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 05:20 PM

"It ain't over till it's over!"

"I just wanna go the distance..."

Somehow Sylvester Stallone is the perfect person to utter both those lines.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: bankley
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 04:26 PM

are you sure these bungee cords aren't too long ?

I usually pack my own 'chute, but I didn't have time today.

which one of you biker faggots wants a piece of me ?

naw, this aluminum ladder doesn't conduct electricity

It's okay, I saw a high-steel worker do this once

isn't this just the cutest litle Grizzly cub

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: robomatic
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 04:10 PM

"Too many zeros on that voltage sign!"

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: GUEST,Ed
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 03:30 PM

She asked me to wear a condom.

I said, no way, it's like walking in the summer with galoshes on. Anyway, I know her very well.

Subject: RE: BS: Most stupid last thing people have said
From: Nickhere
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 03:27 PM

This is not exactly the most stupid LAST thing someone said, but it's pretty thick all the same, and it's a true story. I saw in one of today's newspapers that a man was arrested in Dublin for shooting another man dead. When the police arrested him, they told him eyewitnesses had placed him at the scene of the crime. He immediately retorted (I kid you not) "That's bullshit! I was wearing a balaclava and gloves at the time!"