Subject: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:43 AM Sorry, I couldn't resist.... I'll start off... The Woodpecker's Hole.... |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Rapparee Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:46 AM Mud, Mud, Glorious Mud |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: The Fooles Troupe Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:46 AM You Chicken, Rapaire.... :-P |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: The Borchester Echo Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:54 AM Black Joak by a million miles. And it's the funniest. Contest over. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Midchuck Date: 10 Mar 08 - 10:02 AM Backside Rules the Navy. Redwing (the military version). Peter |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: john f weldon Date: 10 Mar 08 - 10:08 AM North Atlantic Squadron. My Husband's a Plumber. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: john f weldon Date: 10 Mar 08 - 10:18 AM Oh dear. This has remained hidden for years, buried in a secret spot on my website. Years ago I rewrote (updated) "My Husbands a Plumber". Well, you asked for it... Jiggie |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Bill D Date: 10 Mar 08 - 10:20 AM Charlotte, the Harlot....(the LONG version) |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Dave Sutherland Date: 10 Mar 08 - 10:55 AM The Good Ship Venus |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: irishenglish Date: 10 Mar 08 - 10:59 AM Bonny Black Hare! |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Gary T Date: 10 Mar 08 - 11:18 AM Barnacle Bill |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: bobad Date: 10 Mar 08 - 11:21 AM Coca Cola Douche - The Fugs |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: The Mole Catcher's Apprentice (inactive) Date: 10 Mar 08 - 11:55 AM erotic is a better word as in the record The Bird in the Bush : trad erotic songs. from which comes, The Widow of Westmoreland's Daughter Charlotte (there's an avian creature in that there thicket) |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: The Borchester Echo Date: 10 Mar 08 - 12:07 PM "Erotic" certainly is a better word but not appropriate to most of the songs listed here which are nothing more than juvenile, pre-pubescent, sniggering schoolboy crudeness. The Bird In The Bush EP reminds me of Long Pegging Awl from Bert Lloyd, cleverly revived recently by Benji Kirkpatrick. Though Black Joak is still way out in front. Here's a recent recording by the Jim Moray Three |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: The Mole Catcher's Apprentice (inactive) Date: 10 Mar 08 - 12:28 PM "juvenile, pre-pubescent, sniggering schoolboy crudeness." along with smoking behind the gym *LOL* Charlotte (Monday morning on Ma and Pa's piano stool) |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Jean(eanjay) Date: 10 Mar 08 - 01:00 PM The German Musicianer |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: topical tom Date: 10 Mar 08 - 01:11 PM I cannot remember the title of the song but the chorus is Balls to your partner,your ass against the wall If you don't get f---ed on Saturday night You won't get f---ed at all. One verse went: They were doing it in the barley, They were doing it in the oats, Most were doing women but some were doing goats. Singing...Chorus I remember most of the other verses but would rather not publish them here. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: GUEST,PMB Date: 10 Mar 08 - 01:15 PM The Engineer's Song. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: dick greenhaus Date: 10 Mar 08 - 01:27 PM topical Tom- that's a variant of "Ball of Kerimuir" |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: curmudgeon Date: 10 Mar 08 - 02:21 PM "...most of the other verses ..." would be longer than "A Gest of Robin Hood." The chorus you give is a later English rendition. The earlier Scots refrain, with variables: Wha did ye last nicht, wh'll dae ye noo, The yin that did it last nicht, canna dae it noo. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: nutty Date: 10 Mar 08 - 02:32 PM Pheasant Plucker's Son |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: The Vulgar Boatman Date: 10 Mar 08 - 02:34 PM Fortunately, boys will be boys, and so will a lot of midle-aged men. A favourite trick is to wait for Redwing to pop up in a tune session, launch into the B with the immortal words "Oh the moon shines bright on Nellie Cartwright..." and watch who chokes on their pint. KYBTTS Brethren. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Charley Noble Date: 10 Mar 08 - 02:45 PM "Bloody Great Kidney Wiper" with its immortal chorus: With his bloody great kidney wiper, Yes, bloody great kidney-wee, And forty yards of foreskin Hanging down below his knee! "Balls as Heavy as Lead" is another classic in danger of becoming extinct, the chorus of which runs: For they were large balls, Balls as heavy as lead, With a dextrous twist of his muscular wrist He'd sling 'em right over his head! For they were large balls, Balls as heavy as lead! Cheerily, Charley Noble |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Rapparee Date: 10 Mar 08 - 03:16 PM I still think.... But okay: Bastard King of England Bell Bottom Trousers Airborne Ranger Song The Dicky Dina Song Roll Me Over Finger In The Dyke |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: GUEST,guest Date: 10 Mar 08 - 03:25 PM My Love, She is a Yettie Lass |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Leadfingers Date: 10 Mar 08 - 03:26 PM When a man grows old , and his toes turn cold , and the end of his nose turns blue and he's bent in the middle like a One String Fiddle , he can tell you a yarn or two . So find me a seat and stand me a drink , and the tale to you I'l tell - Of Dead Eye Dick , amd Mexican Pete , and the Gentle Eskimo Nell ! |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Snuffy Date: 10 Mar 08 - 03:44 PM Vulgar Boatman, I've been looking for the rest of the words to Nellie Cartwright for years. Any chance of posting them with all the other Redwing parodies on this thread? Pretty please. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: GUEST,TJ in San Diego Date: 10 Mar 08 - 04:27 PM The old LP, "Bawdy Songs and Backroom Ballads" by Oscar Brand, is a classic. It may not meet the "smell test" for downright filthy, but it has a healthy dose of smutty. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Amos Date: 10 Mar 08 - 04:32 PM Topical Tom: That hoary and hairy old classic is originally called The Balls of Kerremuir, I believe, although I am uncertain of the spelling of Kerremuir. I know how to spell balls, though -- ya just go off by yourself for a couple of days. A |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: The Vulgar Boatman Date: 10 Mar 08 - 05:47 PM Snuffy, the lines on the other thread are all I know, maybe even all there are as I've always thought of it as one of those glorious "one liners" which sometimes attach themselves to tunes. Like the National Emblem March, which traditionally has the words "Have you ever caught your knackers in a rat trap..." The Charlie Chaplin connection seems to be what popularised the tune, and knowing what some of those old East Anglian musicians were like, and still are if the Eel's Foot is anything to go by, I wouldn't be surprised if the Nellie Cartwright lines go back to the tune's early days, and were then expanded by the rugby song enthusiasts to parody the Redwing song. The rest of the song is a bit of a mess, which if I remember rightly was published in the sixties in a book called "Why Was He Born So Beautiful". |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Rowan Date: 10 Mar 08 - 06:00 PM Abdul (the Nightingale) Amir Thias Rollo the ravaging Roman are three that go beyond the erotic and behind the bike shed. These days I prefer the more stately Cuckoo's nest but I do sing its bawdier Australian descendant Navvy on the line. Cheers, Rowan |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Rowan Date: 10 Mar 08 - 06:01 PM And how could I have forgotten Life presents a dismal picture? |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Amos Date: 10 Mar 08 - 06:09 PM Les BouchŽes ‡ la Reine The Good Ship Venus The Balls of Kerrmuir Keep On Truckin', Mama The Mayor of Bayswater's Daughter That's enough to, um, get the juices flowing... A |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: skarpi Date: 10 Mar 08 - 07:49 PM Well 50 songs ? Here are the songs I am workin on more than less all the year , some of them I am blowin the dust off :>) some them I am learnin from yesterday . So here we go , the list is long and its marked folk or bluegrass and from what nation . Blugrass/folk American Tennesse Flat Top Box –Johnny Cash Will the Circle Be Unbroken – Folk Little Cabin On The Hill –Folk Forget Me Never –Elvis Presley I Wander How The Old Folks Are At Home –Folk Foggy Mountain Top –Carters Sisters.Folk The Mountains Of Tennessee –Folk Jimmy Brown –Folk I´ll Be All Smile Tonight –Folk Dixie Darling –Folk Wildwood Flower –Folk My old Virgina Home – Folk The Pilgrim –Kris Kristoferson The Key Of Live – Vince gill The Oak Tree – unknown poem /tune skarpi Ref River Valley –Folk Irish/Iclandic/Scottish/Canada/UK /Alaska Rósin Okkar Í Reykjavík – Folk /Iceland Working Man –Folk/Canada Cavan Girl –Folk/Irish Step it Out Mary –Folk /Irish Mollt Malone-Folk/Irish The Foggy Dew-Folk/Irish Sally Garden-Folk/Irish Scotland The brave-Folk/Instrumental/Scottish Carrickfergus-Folk/Irish Ölerindi-Folk/Icelandic Síldarstúlkurnar/Black Velvet Band-Folk -/Irish Will you go Lassie go/The Beaes Of Baluitter-Folk/Scottish Whiskey on a Sunday-Folk/Irish Durham Town –Roger Whitaker/Australia ? My love is like a Red-Folk/Scottish Goodnight Irene-Folk/American ? The Dance of The River-Folk/Kathy Martin Fanningan/Alaska I´ll Tell Me Ma-Folk/Irish Dirty Old Town –Folk Ewan McColl /Scottish Rose Of Avalon –Folk Robert J. Currie /Canada Easy And Slow –Folk /Irish The Town I Love So Well-Folk Phil Cutler /N-Ireland Old Salt – Folk Kathy Martin Fanningan/Alaska Seven Drunken Night –Folk/Irish Drunken Sailor Folk /English The Leaving Of Liverpool Folk/Irish The Mermaid-Folk /Irish Lord Of The Dance –Folk/Irish The Whistling Gypsy-Folk/Scottish The Wild Rover –Folk/English Caledonia Folk /Scottish Whiskey In The Jar –Folk/Irish Back Home In Derry Folk /N-Ireland False Hearted Lover Folk/Scottish The Sicknote –Folk /Irish/English? The Rose of Allendale Folk/Irish Love And Freedom Folk /Irish.trad,Co,Sligo Mursheen Durkin Folk /Irish The Moonshiner Folk /Irish Grace Folk /Irish The Fields Of Atherny Folk /Irish Who´s Gonna Hold Her Hand Folk/American Rolling Down To Old Maui Folk/ ?? Ferryman Folk/Irish Mo Ghile Mear Folk /Irish Fiddlers Green Folk /Irish Spancill Hill Folk /Irish Óró Sé Do Bheatha Bhaile Folk/Irish Drink up The Jamison Folk /Irish The Belfast Mill Folk /N-Ireland The Last Of The Great Whales Folk/English Health To The Company Folk/Irish ? Loch Lomond Folk/Scottish I LoveThe Ground She Walked On Folk /Irish Sixteen Fishermen Raving Folk /N-Ireland The Ould Triangle Folk/Irish /Brendan Behan I´m Asking you Sergant Folk /Scottish /Billy Connolly Old Dungarvon Oak Folk/Irish Galway Bay Folk/Irish Maids When Youre Young Folk/Irish Farwell To Novia Scotia Folk/Canada Darby O´Leary Folk /Irish The Old Alarm Clock Folk /Irish/Scottish Tune The Garden Where The Praties Grow Off To Dublin Folk/Irish Pub With No Beer Folk /Irish Now I Am Easy Folk /English ? Cod Liver Oil Folk /Irish The Cliffs Of Moher Folk / Irish Dicey Reilly Folk /Irish Don't Give up Till Its Over Folk /Irish ? The Mancester Rambler Folk /Scottish/Ewan McColl Donald Whaur´s Yer Troosers Folk/Scottish Hard Times Folk /Stephen Foster /?? The Banks Of Newfoundland Folk/Canada The Thirty Foot Trailer Folk/Scottish/Ewan McColl Leave Us Our Glens Folk/Scottish/McCalmas Soor Mulk Cairt Folk/Scottish Let Us Drink And Go Hame Folk /Scottish Birnie Bouzle Folk/Scottish Yellow On The Broom Folk /Scottish A Rovin I Will Go Folk/Irish-American Where My Eileen is Waiting For Me Folk /Irish Man In The Moon Folk /Canada / Chris Whiteley Mairis Wedding folk / Scottish Mary Mack Folk / ?? The Rare Old Mountain Dew Folk / Irish Johnny Bucker Folk/Canada Follow Me Up To Carlow Folk / Irish A Jar Of Porter Folk/Irish Preap San Ol Folk /Irish /sang in English and Cealic Nelson´s Farewell Folk / Irish Spanish Lady Folk /Irish South Australia Folk / ?? The Unicorn Folk /?? /Shel Silverstein Back in Durhan Gaol Folk /Irish Danny Boy /London Derry Air Folk / Iish The Crack Was Ninety Folk/?? /Barney Rush Don't Get Married Folk / Irish Go To Sea Once More Folk /?? The Boys Of Killibegs Folk / Irish The Glendalough Saint Folk /Irish Reilly´s Doughter Folk / Irish The Old German Clockwinder Folk / Irish ?? New York Girls Folk / Irish Álfareiðin Folk/Icelandic Ég Finn Það Gegnum Svefninn Folk / Icelandic – Canadian Vetrarnótt Folk/Icelandic Krummavísur Folk/Icelandic Suðurnesjamenn Folk/Icelandic Á Sprengisandi Folk/Icelandic Þorrablót Folk/Icelandic Göngur Folk/Icelandic Morgun Bæn Folk/Icelandic Oftast Svellin Örlaga Folk /Icelandic Íslenskt Vögguljóð Folk/Icelandic Sílgræn Börð Folk/Icelandic Man Ég Bjarta Bæinn Folk/Icelandic Yfir Kaldan Eyðisand Folk/Icelandic Höldum Gleði Hátt Folk Icelandic Móðurjörð Hvar Maður Folk/Icelandic Uppi á Háa Hamrinum Folk /Icelandic Bíum Bíum Bambaló/Gone The Rainbow Folk / Irish Dýravísa folk /Icelandic Littlu Hjónin Folk /Sweden Vísur Vatnsenda Rósu Folk/Icelandic Siggi Var Úti Folk /Norway Senn Er Komið Folk/Icelandic Syngur Lóa Folk/Icelandic Kvöldsigling Folk /Icelandic Gefðu Móðurmál Mitt Hymn / ??? Unknown Dröttin Guð Hymn /Norway Ísland Folk/Icelandic Ó Faðir Gjör Mig Lítið Ljós Hymn / M.B.B. Edwards /?? Nú Hverfur Sól í Haf Hymn / Icelandic Í Bolungarvíkini Folk/Icelandic Ég veit Þú Kemur Folk / Icelandic –VestmannIsland Land Rover Folk / Icelandic / Skarpi Haraldsson/ Helgi Kristjánsson Vertu Sæl Mey Folk / Icelandic – VestmannIsland Sofðu Unga Ástin Mín Folk / Icelandic Móður Mín í Kví Kví Folk / Icelandic / one of oldest we know of Ver Du Min Visdom Hymn / Irish / From the year 700 hundred / text Norway So here you go hope you enjoy it took one hour too but this on . I also play dance music , so thats another 150 songs :>) All the Best skarpi Iceland |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Rog Peek Date: 10 Mar 08 - 07:53 PM The Wild West Show Rog |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Suegorgeous Date: 10 Mar 08 - 08:02 PM skarpi You sure you haven't muddled yer threads? *baffled* |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: skarpi Date: 10 Mar 08 - 08:03 PM Uhhh ??? |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: GUEST,Captain Colin Date: 10 Mar 08 - 08:42 PM HA! Very droll skarpi. Sue- he's pretending to misread "filthy" as "fifty". Or maybe not, which is even funnier. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Midchuck Date: 10 Mar 08 - 08:57 PM I can probably come up with fifty filthy songs that I know, if I think on the matter for a while. Can I count filthy parodies of "proper" songs? Including my own compositions? Peter |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Joe_F Date: 10 Mar 08 - 08:59 PM The Lobster |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Leadfingers Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:03 PM 'Twas on the good ship Venus - My word you should have seen us - The Figurehead was painted red - and the masters' name was Greeners - Yo Ho Ho and we dont want any more beer |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Suegorgeous Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:08 PM Capt Colin...I rather fear he's not pretending(!!), ha ha!...hmmm, tho praps not so funny if he spend an HOUR making that list! Do enlighten us, skarpi....*tries not to laff* |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: oldhippie Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:13 PM Oscar Brand does them as well as anybody. Ball of Yarn Cats On the Rooftops We Are From Campus Hall |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: GUEST,Captain Colin Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:15 PM You may be right. He may be totally serious. I fervently hope so. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: GUEST,Granny In Wales Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:32 PM The Twelve Days Of Christmas I Used To Work In Chicago Valencia (Stick your head between your legs and whistle up your Barcelona) Funiculee, Funicular (Squeezed it, teased it, bashed it on the wall) The Wanker Song She Stood On The Bridge At Midnight Sing Us Another One Do Caviar Comes From The Virgin Sturgeon Cats On The Rooftop One-Eyed Reilly |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Fergie Date: 10 Mar 08 - 09:41 PM Eh! I think Scarpi intended to contribute to a concurrent post entitled "Fifty Songs Everyone Should Know" |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: Rowan Date: 10 Mar 08 - 11:19 PM Which means the hour he spent compiling his list is well spent rather than wasted. All he now has to do is a simple copy&paste to the other thread. Go, Skarpi! |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: topical tom Date: 10 Mar 08 - 11:36 PM Has anyone mentioned the "Masturbation Song"? Last night I contemplated masturbation, Oh wasn't it grand,oh wasn't it grand? Left hand, right hand, jerk it in and out, Left hand, right hand, flip it all about! Some will maintain that sexual intercourse is grand But for personal satisfaction I would rather use my hand! I heard this sung many years ago by a schoolteacher originally from Wales. |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: topical tom Date: 11 Mar 08 - 12:24 AM In the previous post I omitted a line.Between the second and third lines should be the following: Just a few taps from the back of the hand To make it stand, to make it stand. I've changed my mind. Here are a few more lyrics that I recall from a version of "The Balls of Kerrmuir": The village magician, he was there. He made a magic pass:he pulled his foreskin over his head And vanished up his ass. Singing balls...(chorus) The village doctor he was there sitting by the fire A-cutting contraceptives from an india rubber tire chorus The village idiot he was there sitting on a mat Amusing himself by abusing himself and catching it in his hat chorus Mercifully those are all the lyrics I remember! |
Subject: RE: Filthy Songs Everyone Should Know From: GUEST,Sonja Date: 11 Mar 08 - 01:30 AM Roll Your Leg Over Roll Me Over In The Clover (both have about as many verses as ya can come up with when y've had a few pints) And how about "Twiddles?" Maybe more double entendre than outright filthy, but still a keeper. |
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