Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited

Subject: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 29 May 08 - 02:44 AM

Dear Everyone,

On Sunday 8th. June at 3.00 p.m. the Lewes Arms international dwyle-flunking team, fresh from their victory over the Cliffe Bonfire Society (http://rozsouth.zenfolio.com/p932887481/, more pictures to come) will be playing at home. A challenge has been issued by the East Grinstead Hash Harriers under their fearless captain John 'Yogi' Allen, melodeon player of Brighton Morris, who describes his team as 'a drinking club with a running problem'.

As usual, musicians are welcome and will be bribed with free beer by both teams, who can increase their scores by doing so. A fine collection of pictures from the last home match can be seen at http://rozsouth.zenfolio.com/p185248663/.

The match will be held at the Lewes Arms, Mount Place, Lewes, East Sussex BN7 1YH UK. Kit inspection begins at 3.00 p.m. and a game usually lasts a couple of hours.

Here is a brief summary of the rules and history of the game as played at the Lewes Arms:

For those of you who have not witnessed this ancient and almost mystical sport, there are two teams of twelve. They dress themselves in bucolic gear and their kit is inspected by the umpire before play begins. Points are deducted for poor turn-out, such as the absence of twirlers (string tied round trouser legs to keep rats out) and excessively flarksy weskits.

The first member of the batting side takes a position next to a bucket of carefully-matured beer in which is a swadger (broom handle) with a dwyle (bar towel) wrapped round the end. At a blast on the umpire's duck whistle, music strikes up and out desperately and the members of the fielding team join hands and dance round the 'Batsman' (or woman) in a girter (circle). When the umpire blows again the dancing team must immediately stop, but must not break the girter. The Batsman must then flunk the dwyle at any member of the opposing team. Scoring is one point for a hit on the arms or legs, two for a hit on the body and three for a hit on the head. If they miss, they have to drink a pint straight down in less time than it takes the fielders to pass the swadger from hand to hand round the circle or lose a point. Musicians are protected by heavy fines from being splashed with stale beer and eligible for bribes in the form of free drinks.

The Batsman may be fined for hesitation; the fielders may be fined for breaking the circle or moving after the whistle. Anyone may be fined for intimidation. A Batsman who splashes the band or onlookers is fined. A side whose score is weak can improve it by bribing the umpire, scorer or the band with drink, gifts or sexual favours. One year every member of a team gave the umpire a scented candle, so this is not necessarily as attractive as it might sound. Bribes are declared to the scorer and registered in the score book. At the end of the match the losing side may empty the bucket over the umpire.

This is obviously a pagan survival which has evaded religious persecution by adopting a faintly Christian disguise. Students of folklore will recognize elements from the Grail legends: the Holy Spear, the vinegar-soaked rag and the vessel of bitter drink. The dancers in their circle echo the twelve apostles, but also the members of a coven. The Batsman is a sacrificial victim who spreads blessing in the form of a stylised asperging before being dispatched for the good of the community. The umpire's fate would have originally been ritual drowning, but appears to have been converted to stylised baptism in accordance with the practices of the more modern religion.

Tootle pip,

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Les in Chorlton
Date: 29 May 08 - 03:11 AM

Is it true that Sharp came across a similar practice in the Appalachians on his first visit and collected the details from Ceek Hoon and Mill Egan or perhaps that was a Celtic Connection?

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 29 May 08 - 03:16 AM

To play this game properly, it should be cider, not beer and the "batsman" as Valmai so quaintly puts it, is blindfolded.

LTS

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Les in Chorlton
Date: 29 May 08 - 03:21 AM

Little known fact:

Cider was first invented as paint stripper but as paint was yet to be invented people decided to drink it instead- the rest is history ( See Wickedpedia 2008)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 29 May 08 - 03:26 AM

Why do you think it was used for flonking?!

LTS

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Les in Chorlton
Date: 29 May 08 - 03:32 AM

Its cheaper than beer.

Cider is the opposite of homeopathy.Their is nothing in homeopathic preparations so when you are ill they do no harm. Cider is full of poisonous chemicals so when you are healthy it makes you sick.

Les

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: RamblinStu
Date: 29 May 08 - 03:38 AM

Dwyle flunking was still played in Norfolk when I lived there about thirty years ago, so I wonder if there will be a contingent from that county……
.
I never could understand the rules, possibly because there was a fair bit of drinking involved and "Nadging the Nerk" was common in those days (Downing a pint in one)

I wish you success with the flunking

Stuart Pendrill

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: RamblinStu
Date: 29 May 08 - 03:40 AM

And that was a pint of bitter, not cider

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 29 May 08 - 04:03 AM

Many thanks to everyone for their erudite comments. There are many local variants of dwyle flunking: the one requiring a blindfold is more like Blind Man's Buff. In the Lewes variant it might be kinder to blindfold the spectators; see August 2008 photos

I should mention that match fees and a collection will be taken in for the Rhys Jones Memorial Fund.

The Rhys Jones Memorial Fund has been launched by members of the local community, in memory of the 11 year old who was killed in Croxteth on 22nd August 2007, to raise money for a community centre to be built on the estate where he lived. "It will", said his parents, Melanie and Stephen, "be the best tribute to our son we could possibly think of and we urge people everywhere to support the project."

The centre will be designed to provide a safe place for children and young people to meet and play and will include sports facilities such as all-weather soccer pitches. The centre will proudly bear the name of Rhys Jones and will be a fitting tribute to a boy who would surely have used and enjoyed the facilities himself.

Whilst a charity to manage the community centre development is being set up Liverpool Charity and Voluntary Services is acting as fund holder for the Rhys Jones Memorial Fund.

Send a cheque, payable to Liverpool Unites, to Andy Cook, Marketing Department, Liverpool Echo, PO Box 48, Old Hall Street, Liverpool L69 3EB.

Donations to the Rhys Jones Memorial Fund can also be given over the internet through www.lcvs.org.uk or by phone by calling 0151-243 1076.

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 29 May 08 - 04:03 AM

Fermented apple pressings, water.. occasionally a bunch of sloes in the final pressing... nothing chemical there. You've been drinking the wrong stuff!

LTS

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Raggytash
Date: 29 May 08 - 04:46 AM

Don't forget a Rat, if you're making Cider a Rat in the Vat is essential.

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 29 May 08 - 04:50 AM

I for one won't deviate from my normal policy of drinking Harveys best bitter for this sport (and any other).

We've used the rules quoted above for at least the last thirty years at the Lewes Arms. Our most memorable match was in the early 1980s, when we had a three-cornered contest between teams from the Lewes Arms front bar, Glyndebourne (chorus and LPO members) and the Newhaven lifeboat crew.

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Dave Earl
Date: 29 May 08 - 05:01 AM

Hey I'm not working that day (8/6/08)

Looks like I will be able to attend this this year.


Dave

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 29 May 08 - 05:24 AM

Great! Would you like to bring a drum or something and join the band?

Don't forget we've got Cloudstreet doing an all-day vocal harmony workshop and evening performance at the Lewes Arms folk club the day before. They hope to be able to stay for the dwyle flunking; it might even inspire them to take the sport home to Australia, in which case we could look forward to intercontinental matches in the future.

Tootle pip,

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Les in Chorlton
Date: 29 May 08 - 05:28 AM

I trust people will be abiding by the amendments to the rules suggested by Pee Sellers and the Ben Team (1957)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Dave Earl
Date: 29 May 08 - 05:31 AM

Could dust off my banging thing and bring it along.

I have to work on the Cloudstreet evening though.

Dave

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Dave Earl
Date: 29 May 08 - 05:49 AM

Hooray I got it wrong!

I finish work at 14:00 on the 7th so I can make the Cloudstreet evening.

Dave

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: My guru always said
Date: 29 May 08 - 06:32 AM

Excellent explanation (the rest of the world will just love this) and good to see this event publicised, well done Valmai!

We'll be in Devon I'm afraid and have to miss both the Dwyle Flunking and the Harmony Day with Cloudstreet (you lucky lot) but know you'll have a Fab time! Enjoy!

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 29 May 08 - 06:52 AM

Les: no, we won't be following those rules, but the diversity adds to life's rich tapestry.

Dave, your banging thing would be an excellent addition to the band. See you for Cloudstreet on the Saturday evening, and make sure you're ready for a floor spot. I could hear you through a couple of walls at Chippenham, so I know you're in good form.

Tootle pip,

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Les in Chorlton
Date: 29 May 08 - 07:27 AM

Valmai,

go on, go on!

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Dave Earl
Date: 29 May 08 - 07:28 AM

Er is there a formal mode of dress for da band?

Or will usual silly headgear suffice?

Dave

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Dave Earl
Date: 29 May 08 - 07:29 AM

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: TheSnail
Date: 29 May 08 - 07:52 AM

Here are some examples of standards you should aspire to, Dave -

Picture 1
Picture 2
Picture 3

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 29 May 08 - 08:17 AM

Picture 3 shows the hen rinse very common among women of a certain age.

This one was quite possibly taken after some cider had been spilled: >Fumes

Tootle pip,

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Les in Chorlton
Date: 29 May 08 - 09:15 AM

I have never seen that effect before. Is it intestinal?

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 29 May 08 - 10:07 AM

No, Church of England.

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Les in Chorlton
Date: 29 May 08 - 10:49 AM

Bless you sister

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Dave Earl
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 02:42 AM

Refresh

This event needs to be kept in peoples minds.

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 03:32 AM

So it does, thanks, Dave. I should mention that it isn't an Indoors If Wet sort of sport.

Your usual cap will be fine for the purpose.

Tootle pip,

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Folkiedave
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 04:27 AM

I should mention that the batting team aiming at the same person all the time in order to get them disgustingly drunk (preferably the one least used to drink) is known around here in Yorkshire as a "Sir Geoffrey".

Years ago Folk Union One and The Bridge Hotel in Newcastle used to meet in North Yorks and (laughingly) help Bill Cowley get his harvest in. This was one of the highlights of the weekend. In fact after this there wasn't much of a weekend left.

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Dave Earl
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 09:27 AM

"Your usual cap will be fine for the purpose."

I am working on an improvement which involves a cuddly toy parrot.

See you Saturday evening.

Dave

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Rusty Dobro
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 11:36 AM

I'm sure that all of us big-hearted people in Suffolk and Norfolk, where dwile (never dwyle) flunking originated, will graciously allow folks from the Shires (that's everyone not from Suffolk or Norfolk) to enjoy our national game. Royalties payable once we gain our independence from England, though........

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 12:13 PM

Which goes to show that the quality of Mercia is not strained. Thank you very much, o peoples of Suffolk and Norfolk.

Ideally our aim should be to get dwyle flunking recognised as an Olympic sport, tegether with stoolball and toad-in-the-hole.

Valmai (Lewes)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: M.Ted
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 01:21 PM

Somehow, this thread seems incomplete without evidence of the act itself.Alnwick in 2000

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Steve Gardham
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 05:26 PM

M.Ted,
Great stuff. Pretty much how it's been played in Yorkshire since at least the 60s. Just a couple of quibbles: The flonker was lurching rather far from the bucket in flonking the dwyle. Twould be a foul in Yorkshire, and that glass looked to be less than a pint! Just as the fielding team must maintain uniform progress around the circle the flonker must maintain uniform progress in the opposite direction and a sudden lurch towards a victim would constitute a break in that progress, tantamount to hesitation!

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 03:36 AM

Many thanks for the link: that's fascinating. The regalia is superb. I particularly like the umpire's Town Crier outfit.

This version differs quite a lot from the game as played in Lewes. Our fielding side holds hands and dances round to music. If the batsman misses, he has to drink a pint straight down while the fielding side pass the swadger, not the dwyle, round the ring, and they stand as close together as possible.

Another significant difference is that the YouTube clip, being from much nearer the Arctic Circle than Lewes, shows beer with a thick coating of snow on the top. Harveys Best Bitter does not have this impediment to fast swallowing.

You may notice in some of the pictures of the last Lewes Arms match that there is a chalk outline of a fallen figure. This has been traditional since one of the players decided to foul the batsman by kicking him while dancing round. The fouler fell with a loud popping sound indicating a badly-damaged ankle and had to be stretchered in an ambulance. It required huge self-control among the free reed players present not to imitate a siren.

A quick-thinking but somewhat callous observer borrowed the chalk from the darts board and drew round the fallen athlete. Even after the fame had finished the pathetic outline remained to strike fear into passers-by, with wisps of straw blowing across it and a strong smell of stale beer.

Tootle pip,

Valmai (Lewes)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 01:49 PM

Apologies for the typos in my previous post.

Here is a picture showing the chalk outline being drawn. The picture also gives a good view of the obligatory twirlers and the straw stuffed up the trousers.

In all probability this is the explanation for the mysterious figure on the nearby Downs,the Long Man of Wilmington

Valmai (Lewes)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 03:00 PM

Aha! Diligent research - not mine - has revealed a MySpace video clip of the match between the Lewes Arms and the Cliffe Bonfire Society at the Cliffe Independence Day 2007, in hideous weather conditions. It conveys the atmosphere very well.

Valmai (Lewes)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 05 Jun 08 - 04:29 AM

And yet more research has revealed this home match
from 2005. It is at our home ground, the Lewes Arms itself. You can hear quite a bit of music.

Many thanks to Michael and Trevor Curry for making this available.

Valmai (Lewes)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Dave Earl
Date: 05 Jun 08 - 05:48 AM

"explanation for the mysterious figure on the nearby Downs"

He's holding a matched pair of swadgers - and very a very nice pair and an unmatched swadger are displayed by the cerne abbas giant (look it up for yourselves if you need to)

Dave

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 05 Jun 08 - 06:44 AM

Dave, you're absolutely right. As his creator is not known, he's carrying what is probably the earliest known example of a folk club: see Cerne Abbas giant .

Tootle pip,

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 05 Jun 08 - 11:33 AM

That's the thing he has in his hand, not the other 'club'... The Cerne Giant and I are very well acquainted, I used to work in the village and have spent many a happy hour rambling over the Frying Pan and round the Giant Head.

LTS

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: M.Ted
Date: 05 Jun 08 - 08:24 PM

I liked the other clips, but I loved the 2005 clip--the music is truly wonderful, and of course," The Snail", and his signature hat, stand out, making it, for our purposes, excellent.

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 06 Jun 08 - 08:07 AM

Perhaps I should point out that in that clip the one with the horns is me. I hasten to add that they are not the ones I wear on Bonfire Night, which are real.

Valmai (Lewes)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Bee
Date: 06 Jun 08 - 11:22 AM

I learn something new every time I read Mudcat.

I'm now trying to imagine if there will ever be a circumstance here where I can work Dwyle Flonking into a conversation... or swadger.

But it looks like fun.

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: M.Ted
Date: 06 Jun 08 - 01:13 PM

Well played, Valmai.

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 08 Jun 08 - 04:19 AM

Thank you very much, M.Ted, I'm touched. (No surprises there.)

The weather is excellent for the match this afternoon. The pitch will be in perfect condition, unlike most of the athletes, and it's probable that the stakes placed by Far Eastern gambling syndicates are reaching record levels.

Come along and play some tunes, or come and watch a lot of people making twirps of themselves. The address is the Lewes Arms, Mount Place, Lewes, BN7 2DL, A map can be found here.

As explained earlier, a collection is being taken for The Rhys Jones Memorial Fund, in memory of the 11 year old who was shot in Croxteth on 22nd August 2007, to raise money for a community centre to be built on the estate where he lived.

Valmai (Lewes)

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 08 Jun 08 - 06:14 AM

Sorry - the Lewes Arms's postcode is BN7 1YH. The other is my home address - an easy mistake to make.

Valmai

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: TheSnail
Date: 08 Jun 08 - 06:41 AM

If Far Eastern gambling syndicates are taking an interest, this means that massive bribes will probably be made to players and musicians to try and influence the outcome.

Excellent news.

Subject: RE: Dwyle flunking, Lewes: musicians invited
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 09 Jun 08 - 03:24 AM

The match was a resounding success; over £200 was raised for the Rhys Jones Memorial Fund.

Pictures have already appeared here (best viewed as a slideshow).

There is a good one of the band, who finished the match exceptionally well-bribed, here . You can see Breton Cap in unfamiliar headgear. The picture was taken before the arrival of the piper Dirk Campbell with a magnificent central European bagpipe called the dudu (I think) which appears to be a hollowed-out goat with cow-horns for drones. It plays in G. People realise this instinctively as their first utterance on seeing the instrument is usually something like 'Gee!'

The next match will be on Sunday 17th. August against the Lewes Operatic Society. Appropriate tunes are already under discussion.

Tootle pip,

Valmai (Lewes)