Mad Magazine parodies

Subject: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Fred Maslan
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 03:04 PM

I remember fondly from my youth that Mad Magazine did a number of parodies of popular songs and classics. The one I remember best was
their parody of "Tea for Two" post WWIII

Picture you alone with me
A tree for two our home would be
With me for you and you for me ALONE!

Nobody near us to see or to hear us
No inlaws arriving
Cause none are surviving
No one will phone dear
Cause there are no phones to own, dear

That's all I remember, but i would love to have more. If anyone remembers or has ancient moldering copies of mad they can research I would be most apreciative.

Thank you all.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: MartinRyan
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 03:17 PM

"I wandered lonely as a cloud
.......

When all at once I spied a crowd
- A host of golden daffodils.
Beside the lake, beneath the trees
Enough to make a man's blood freeze."

Jeez! I'm getting flashbacks of Black Spy and White Spy!

Regards

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: fat B****rd
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 03:22 PM

I can't remenmber the words but in their Beat Generation parody "Wouldn't It Be Loverly" became "Wouldn't It Be Kerouac".
Now I wish I'd kept all my Mad paperbacks !!

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: bubblyrat
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 03:23 PM

What ? Me worry ?

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Little Robyn
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 03:58 PM

The girl that I marry will have to be
A purple skinned beauty with 2 heads or 3
The girl I call my wife
Will have a nose with 8 nostrils you play like a fife
The girl I propose to
Will have 7 toes too
Like me.


I have often walked down the street before
But there once was......

I can't remember.

Actually, they did several shows over the years - I'm sure they did West Side Story but I can't remember any of the song parodies from that one.

I was a Mad fan once but that was about 40 years ago now!
But I did buy a couple for my daughter when she was school age.
Robyn

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Paul Burke
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 03:17 AM

The "daffodils" parody ran:

I wandered lonely as a clod,
Just picking up old rags and bottles;
When onward on my way I trod,
I saw a host of axolotls.
Beside the lake, beneath the trees
A sight to make a man's blood freeze.
Some had handles, some were plain;
They came in blue, red, pink and green.
Some were orange in the main--
The damnedest sight I've ever seen.
The females gave a spritely glance,
The male ones all wore knee-length pants.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: MartinRyan
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 03:38 AM

Paul

Thanks for that! True poetry never dies!

Regards
p.s. Sounds like the early days of the Morris dance revival...

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: katlaughing
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 03:45 AM

I have a lot of them in some bin in storage. I bought them religiously until Bill Gaines died and it went to crap. When I find them next, I'll have a look.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Mr Happy
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 03:46 AM

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mad_(magazine)

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 08:52 AM

"My" era was late '50s - early '60s and I memorized (not exactly intentionally) a lot of Mad doggeral. Wish I could find copies of the originals to see if my memory is any good! (Especially of "The Spaniel", the Mad parody of Edgar Allen Poe's "The Raven".)

I think that I should never hear
A poem as lovely as a beer.
The brew that Joe's Bar has on tap
With golden base and flowing cap.
The stuff I sit and drink all day
Until my memory melts away.
Poems are made by fools, I fear,
But only Schlitz can make a beer.

or

Tigers, Tigers, fighting bright
In the ball parks of the night
Your pitching's fair, your field adroit,
So why no pennants for Detroit?

You blaze around the big league parks
With bats that fairly give off sparks,
But when they total up the score
You've lost again to Baltimore.

The Cleveland Indians go to work.
They beat you good, so does New York.
When Boston adds a mortal blow,
All you can shout's "Look out below!"

Tigers, Tigers, fighting bright
In the ball parks of the night.
Someday the fans will get their fill
And ship the team to Louisville.


Really wish I could find the words to "The Spaniel" ...

Linn

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: MartinRyan
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 09:04 AM

This being the Mudcat - we have it already!

Click here!

Regards p.s. Well... a good start anyway!

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Nicholas Waller
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 11:08 AM

You can get 50+ years of MAD Magazine from 1952-2006 on 2 DVDs... 600 issues, 17,500 pages. I've just ordered it, not got it yet, so not sure what it's like in terms of quality.

I don't think I've read MAD in decades, but I've fond memories of the late-60s era and can recall several artists - Don Martin, Al Jaffee, Dave Berg, Mort Drucker (the film parodies), Sergio Aragones (the marginal drawn-out dramas) - off the top of my head, which I can't say about many other comic artists (except Frank Bellamy of TV21/Thunderbirds/Zero-X fame. And Her"Tintin"Ge, of course).

When I mentioned MAD-DVD to my brother, he asked how you would get the inside-back-cover foldins to work. I didn't know, but I just found the New York Times, of all places, has a few interactive MAD foldins on their site.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: MartinRyan
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 11:29 AM

It was the schooner Hesperus that sailed the wintry sea
And the skipper had taken his little 'hem-hem' to keep him company.


Was that another from the same stable?

Regards

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Micca
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 11:40 AM

Friends,Romans, hipsters
let me clue you in
we come to put Caeser down
not to groove him

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Fred Maslan
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 01:50 PM

More! Ah ha ha More! Ah ha ha ha ha More! Ah ha ha ha ha ha......;

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Little Robyn
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 03:43 PM

Good link Mr Happy:

In 1961, a group of music publishers representing songwriters such as Irving Berlin, Richard Rodgers and Cole Porter filed a $25 million lawsuit against Mad for copyright infringement following "Sing Along With Mad," a collection of parody lyrics "sung to the tune of" many popular songs. The publishing group hoped to establish a legal precedent that only a song's composers retained the right to parody that song. The U.S. District Court ruled largely in favor of Mad in 1963, affirming its right to print 23 of the 25 song parodies under dispute. An exception was found in the cases of two parodies, "Always" (sung to the tune of "Always") and "There's No Business Like No Business" (sung to the tune of "There's No Business Like Show Business"). Relying on the same verbal hooks ("always" and "business"), these were found to be overly similar to the originals. The music publishers appealed the ruling, but the U.S. Court of Appeals not only upheld the pro-Mad decision in regard to the 23 songs, it stripped the publishers of their limited victory regarding the remaining two songs. The publishers again appealed, but the Supreme Court refused to hear it, thus allowing the decision to stand.[13][21]

This precedent-setting case established the rights of parodists and satirists to mimic the meter of popular songs. However, the "Sing Along With Mad" songbook was not the magazine's first venture into musical parody. In 1960, Mad had published "My Fair Ad-Man," a full advertising-based spoof of the hit Broadway musical "My Fair Lady." In 1959, "If Gilbert & Sullivan wrote Dick Tracy" was one of the speculative pairings in "If Famous Authors Wrote the Comics".


Very interesting! Those are the ones I remember.
And this bit could have been a problem for many of us:

"The publishing group hoped to establish a legal precedent that only a song's composers retained the right to parody that song."

Robyn

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Severn
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 03:45 PM

The whole "East Side Story" musical spoof anf the fight songs for different occupations.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Charley Noble
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 04:11 PM

What about the potrzebie and the eggplant?

"Potrzebie" is alleged to be Polish for "I had one grunch but the eggplant over there."

Gives one a lot to think about.

Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: katlaughing
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 04:22 PM

Guest, Nicholas, thanks for the info and links!!

I raised my kids on MAD, again, until Gaines died. My copies are all tattered and worn as each child grew old enough to read them.:-)

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bainbo
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 04:35 PM

Micca - I thought at first yours was from Lord Buckley; but of course, it's not. His version of Mark Anthony went: "Hipsters, flipsters and finger-poppin' daddies. Knock me your lobes."

I remember one of the Mad Magazine parodies had Napoleon singing, to the tune of We'll Have Manhattan: "I'll conquer Russia / Then all of Prussia / I will win. / Then I'll go marching in / Berlin."

But, for some reason, the one that's stuck in my mind in its entirety is a Christmas parody, to the tune of Deck The Halls:
Deck the bars with Christmas drinking
Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la
See the people getting stinking
Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la
Though their brains are half corroded,
Fa-la-la la-la la-la-la-la

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bainbo
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 04:48 PM

Second half of my post disappeared. Don't know why.

Deck the bars with Christmas drinking
Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la
See the people getting stinking
Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la
Though their brains are half corroded,
Fa-la-la la-la-la la-la-la
Still they try to drive home loaded
Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la.

See the busy intersection
Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la
Here come cars from each from each direction
Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la
See the pile-up as they're meeting
Fa-la-la la-la-la la-la-la
What a novel Christmas greeting
Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la

Do you know, that must have been rattling around in my head for 35 years and - apart from humming it to myself - I've never had any cause to use it, until now. This will probably prove quite cathartic. Thanks, Fred.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Charley Noble
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 08:41 PM

Bainbo-

Thanks for the extra verses to "Deck the Hall with Boston Charlie."

Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: clueless don
Date: 02 Sep 08 - 10:11 AM

One that I remember:

When you eat meat
and hate the meat that you're eating
you have surely got...
Ground Round!
It's so unnerving
when they're constantly serving
in an eating spot...
Ground Round!
It may be called
a chopped steak, Salisbury,
or beef patty.
No matter what it's called
it's always overcooked and fatty.
What can you do?
Call out to your waiter there,
beat down on your table
stand up on your chair
and say
Ground Round!
piled on my plate I see
Ground Round!
you're always conning me!
Ground Round!
Why does it have to be
Ground Round...
Ground Round...
Ground Round...[fade out]

Don

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Roger in Baltimore
Date: 02 Sep 08 - 01:41 PM

To the tune "Anchor Aweigh"

Trash cans away my boys,
Trash cans away.
Let's hear you make some noise,
We'll wake them up today.

Egg shells and coffe grounds,
Grease from the pan,
Don't make ear-splitting sounds,
So dump that garbage, dump that garbage can.

Bi RiB

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,A E Neuman
Date: 02 Sep 08 - 02:03 PM

"Casey, Casey, we'll lead the gang all through:
Drive half-crazy, right down the avenue,
We'll do a ton up the M1.
Old ladies we will knock down,
And we'll not stop for any cop,
On our motorbike built for two"

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 02 Sep 08 - 09:00 PM

MartinRyan --

Did you notice who posted "The Spaniel"?

Moi -- Bat Goddess. From memory. Wish I could find a copy to compare the memory to!!!

Linn

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 02 Sep 08 - 09:19 PM

How about Mad's hipster version of the Gettysburg Address? --

Four score and like seven years ago
Our old daddies came on this scene
With a new group, grooved in free kicks
And hip to the jazz that all cats make it the same.
...
We're here on a wild spot of that hassle
And we've got eyes to tag a bit as a lay down pad
For those who here conked out that our group might still score.
It's frantically cool and jivey that we're on this kick
But in a bigger ribble we can't clue in, we can't sound off...

Alas, memory fails.

Linn

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Gerry
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 12:37 AM

At http://jeffersonbedford.blogspot.com/ it says,

4 score and like 7 years ago
our old daddies came on this scene with a new group
grooved in free kicks, and hip to the jazz that all cats make it the same.
Now we're real hung up in a crazy big hassle,
digging whether that group, or any group so grooved and so hip, can keep on swinging.
We're making it on a wild spot of that hassle.
We've got eyes to tag a little of that spot as a last lay-down pad
for those who here conked out, so that group might still score.
It's frantically cool and jivey that we're on this kick.
But in a bigger ribble. we can't shake up, we can't sound off,
we can't even clue in this jazz.
The cool cats. with us and down yonder, who flipped here,
have pegged it straighter tha we could ever mess with.
The squares will never buy this bit, nor dig the lyrics we spiel here;
but they can't ever put down what those studs did here.
It's for us, the on-cats, who ought to pick up on those still-wailing blues
which the off-cats who goofed here have blown so crazily up to now.
MAN!!
Like we really ought to be here with eyes fixed on this wild gig
that still needs action,
that from those far-out D.O.A. is we get a little higher on that
kick for which they really went and flipped their gaskets;
that we take it on to set straight - that these cats shall not have
kicked off squares;
that this group under God, shall blow a crazy new sound,
and that a hot combo - of the hipsters, by the hipsters and for the hipsters,
shall not cut from this scene.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Fred Maslan
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 10:07 AM

You had to be familiar with Shakespear in order to get it!

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: EBarnacle
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 11:13 AM

One of my most frequent citations is from MAD's take off on Chuck Connors' "The Rifle, man."

As they are wandering through the West, with Chuck blowing people away on sight, his son asks: "Daddy, you say you're a peace loving man; so how come you keep killing them?" The reply: "There ain't nothin' so peaceful as a dead man, son."

Sadly, it is still relevant today.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Kevin Sheils
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 11:42 AM

Little Robyn wrote

I have often walked down the street before
But there once was......

I can't remember.

Ah that was the "My Fair Advertising Executive" one

The only verse I can recall is

"People stop and stare
At the colored (sic) signs
Telling them to buy their cheese from Kraft
And beans from Heinz"

The rest has gone with a few brain cells.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Cool Beans
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 02:10 PM

In Levittown did Irving Kahn
A stately pleasure dome decree
Where Alf the sacred Neuman dwelt....

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 06:44 PM

Thank you, Guest Gerry!!!

Now if someone can find "The Spaniel"...

Linn

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Piers Plowman
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 02:24 AM

The only bit of MAD comic verse I remember is this one:

Ringo, Paul, George and John
Played a trick and put us on:
They said Paul was dead as nails
And rocketed the record sales!

I subscribed to MAD for a few years during puberty and finally cancelled when I'd gotten sick of it. I saw William Gaines on a Saturday morning children's TV show and I vaguely remember the interview. There was a question about doing something different and he responded by saying something about having a recipe (or something) and sticking to it. I felt rather let down and disappointed, however, it was obviously true. Very shortly afterwards I cancelled my subscription. Mostly, MAD's style of humor irritates me now, whereby I mean my memories of it, since I don't think I've looked inside one since the mid-1970s. However, I can appreciate the talent and skill that went into it.

I have mixed feelings about William Gaines. According to what I've read, his very gruesome horror comics were a major factor in the introduction of the Comic Book Code (or whatever it was called) and he avoided the consequences by publishing MAD as a magazine rather than a comic book (except for the very first issue or so). I don't think it's a black and white issue. The Comic Book Code resulted in rather bland comics but I wouldn't give some of what had been being published to children to read.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 09:57 AM

From around 1965, to the tune of "White Christmas"

I'm screaming at a white sheepdog;
One who is sitting in my chair.
It's a thing I'm dreading,
The way he's shedding,
And covering everything with hair.
I'm screaming at a white sheepdog
And should he visit you some night,
May his bark be worse than his blight,
And may all your furniture be white.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: EBarnacle
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 12:48 PM

Mad originated as Mad Comics, published by EC [Educational Comics], which was, as mentioned above, one of the causes of the Code.

When I was 8, I ws sent to sleepaway camp. I once had a collection of Mad Comics and early Mad Magazines. When I got back, we had moved and all "that trash" had been discarded. Some things you don't forget.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,robpape
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 01:30 PM

One I recall was

I remember I remember the house where I was born....
My 11 brothers hated me...
My sisters felt the same ..
Mum never called me at breakfast...
She couldn't remember my name !!

Also any one recall My Blue Shelter ???

Just a hole in the floor
A six inch thick lead door ...
Will lead you to my Blue Shelter
Do you know the rest ???

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Barbara
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 10:33 PM

There's a huge mushroom cloud looming upwards (2X)
It may seem to appear that an A Bomb dropped here,
But it's only our barbecue out in the rear...

Oh what a beautiful beefsteak,
Oh, what a sweet tenderloin
Too bad that pop had to cook out
Black to a crisp it will burn (boin).

that's all I remember. Oh What a Beautiful Morning.
Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: GUEST,Neville Orange
Date: 01 Oct 08 - 07:59 PM

I have often walked down this street before
but the pavement always stayed beneath my feet before
now as I walk by I see rubble fly
boy it's rough on the street where you live.

People stop and stare, they don't bother me
I've got lead underwear, I'm safe as I can be
All the air is filled with radioactivity
and it's worse on the street where you live.

And oh the frightening feeling
as the glow spreads over the land
that exposed to lightening feeling
as the Geiger counter clicks to beat the band.

There are no more trees they've been all knocked down
and you'll never hear a bird in any part of town
see the plane draw near, let's get out of here
Yucca Flats is no street where to live.

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Cool Beans
Date: 01 Oct 08 - 08:41 PM

Just Molly and me,
Let's see, that makes three...

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: JJ
Date: 02 Oct 08 - 10:52 AM

A hundred and one
Slugs of fun
That's my little tommy-gun!
Gonna use my tommy-gun tonight...

From "South Chicago," a parody of "South Pacific"

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: davyr
Date: 02 Oct 08 - 11:40 AM

Little Robyn said:
Actually, they did several shows over the years - I'm sure they did West Side Story but I can't remember any of the song parodies from that one.

Although I can still visualise that parody quite clearly (Kruschev and Kennedy were the two rival gang leaders), the only line I can recall is "Brush teeth with Crest in Amer-ica!"

The other "Girl that I marry" line I remember went:

"The girl that I marry will have to be
A real Transylvanian monstrosity!"

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: clueless don
Date: 02 Oct 08 - 01:26 PM

davyr, wasn't that "The thing that I bury..."? or possibly "The ghoul that I bury..."? I think the parody was called "Manny get your ghoul".

Memories have faded as regards the West Side Story parody - possibly it was called "East Side Story" (is the U. N. building located on New York's East Side?) I remember a song sung by Mao Tse Tung (I think that's how his name was transliterated back then), which included the lines "Please be sweet to us, and give a seat to us. [????] and such joy you'll get, like we gave Tibet" and later there was a verse that ended "like our troops are in North Vietnam". Another section was "That's right! You bet! We will preserve law and order, like when we crossed India's border." All to the tune of "There's a Place for Us".

Don

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Oldguit
Date: 02 Oct 08 - 01:56 PM

When I were a lad, an older friend of mine gave me one of those flimsy free giveaway 45's from MAD MAG. it was a parody of Christmas speeches from around the world. I wish I still had it. The bits I remember are:

Jesus himself was a radical and a socialist (in a harold Wilson voice)

Here in the Commonwealth or the common poverty as we sometimes call it. (in an indian accent)

Refs to Santa thrusting himself up the soothy pathage (in a rather lithpy accent)

Here we are swealtering around the traditional yule tide fire (in an Australian accent)

That's my lot. If anyone has any more of it, I'd love to know.

Oldguit Arr

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: davyr
Date: 03 Oct 08 - 04:52 AM

Don, yes, I think you're right - it was "The ghoul that I bury".

And it definitely was "East Side Story".

Blimey, it's getting tough remembering stuff from the early 60s with any degree of accuracy. Perhaps I really was there after all...

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: clueless don
Date: 03 Oct 08 - 08:22 AM

Oldguit, I also remember those giveaway 45's! As I recall, I had one with a song called "She got a nose job". It started

She got a nose job
She got a nose job
it's now turned up
instead of hanging down
She got a nose job
She got a nose job
and now she's the prettiest gal in town!

But I'm off-topic, since that wasn't a parody.

Don

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: mrmoe
Date: 03 Oct 08 - 08:26 AM

I looked both long and hard for a copy of "she got a nose job"; finally found a copy of the "mad twists rock & roll" lp that had it.....I actually have a digitized (cd) of that lp now...

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 03 Oct 08 - 08:24 PM

I remember "She Got A Nose Job" -- and it still pops into my consciousness when I least expect it (as does a lot of early '60s Mad satire).

Anyone come up with the Edgar Allan Poe (or Edgar, Al, and Moe) parody of "The Raven" redone as "The Spaniel"?

"Once upon a midnight cautious, while I pondered weak and nauseous
Over many an advertising copy I had wrote for Macy's store.
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping
As of someone loudly rapping, rapping at my office door.
'Tis some client there," I muttered. Only this and nothing more."

Etcet

Remember a fair amount, but not the whole thing.

Linn

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Cool Beans
Date: 03 Oct 08 - 10:32 PM

Quoth the spaniel, "Drink Blatz Beer."
(That's all I've got)

Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 04 Oct 08 - 08:28 AM

Here's what I've got -- incomplete, of course. I've posted it on a previous Mad doggeral thread. Really would like to find the complete poem somewhere.

Linn


The Spaniel

Once upon a midnight cautious while I pondered weak and nauseous
Over many an advertising copy that I wrote [sic] for Macy's store.
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping
As of someone loudly rapping, rapping at my chamber door.
"Tis some client there," I muttered. Only this and nothing more.

Then I felt my terror worsen, for my guest was not a person.
In there stepped a cocker spaniel, naturally I jumped in fear.
Tried to climb an oaken panel, ripping there my new grey flannel
But the spaniel only stood there, speaking out with voice so clear
Speaking out like Jack Lescoulie in a voice both loud and clear.
Quoth the spaniel, "Drink Blatz beer."

How I marvelled this ungainly dog that did commercials plainly
Thoughts of fortunes I could make now make me shake down to my knees.
But the spaniel set me grieving then by turning tail and leaving
Chasing him along the hallway, crying out, "Stay with me me please!"
Chasing him along the hallway, crying out, "Stay with me please!"
Quoth the spaniel, "Eat Kraft Cheese."