New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas

Subject: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: Les B
Date: 17 Jun 99 - 02:59 PM

A group I play with are working up a version of "Arkansas Traveler" with the 1840's fiddle tune and the old jokes, like:

TRAVELER: Have you lived here all your life ?
FARMER: Not yet !
TRAVELER: Tell me, my good man, where does this road go ?
FARMER: It don't go nowhere, every morning I get up and it's still there !

We thought, however, that we might add a "new age" section with lines like:
TRAVELER: Are you in touch with your inner child ?
FARMER: Are you kiddin', you can get busted for that !
What sort of lines can you clever 'catters come up with for this ?

Subject: RE: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: Nathan
Date: 17 Jun 99 - 07:43 PM

TRAVELER: You got a modem in the house?

FARMER: No, but you're welcome to use the privy around the back.

Subject: RE: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: katlaughing
Date: 17 Jun 99 - 08:58 PM

Traveler: Say! What's your sign?

Farmer: Why it's so's folks'll know they's butter and eggs fer sale!

Traveler: No, no. I mean your astrological sign!

Farmer: No, it wan't astreenomeecal. Charley only charged me a fiver to paint it, curleecues an' all!

Another:

Traveler: My Guides told me I would find my soul mate here.

Farmer: Dija lose a shoe? I ain't seen no extra shoes 'round here. Never heard a'nobody leading a body to they-ah lost shoe!

Traveler: My soul mate! The light of my life! The one from my past life whom I shall love forever and ever; whom I shall reconnect with this time!

Farmer: Oh! Yer talking about them fancy new sneakers, aintcha? With the lights in 'em? I seen the Travers boy wearing them last week over ta Wilburton! Maybe he has your lost shoe!

This is fun! I'll see if I can cook up some more! Thanks! katlaughing

Subject: RE: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: The Shambles
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 05:02 PM

After asking the farmer where all roads at the crossroads lead to and receiving no sensible reply, the traveller shouted "well what do you know"?

To which the farmer replied, "I know I'm not lost".

Subject: RE: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: GUEST,Ron Thomas
Date: 31 Jan 22 - 08:45 PM

See one of the Jerry Garcia and David Grissman CDs. They do a version of the humorous question and answer lyrics to Arkansas Traveler. Came across that version looking for Will Maring's lyrics that she wrote. Can be seen on YouTube... either as her solo on guitar or with Robert Bowlin.

Subject: RE: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 31 Jan 22 - 11:54 PM

This isn't one of Mudcat's speedier responses. 23 years might be a new record. :)

Subject: RE: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: cnd
Date: 01 Feb 22 - 08:52 AM

Reminds me of an old bit from comedian Carl Hurley by way of Kentucky humorist Joe Creason...

An out-of-towner was driving down a winding Kentucky backroad when he came upon a farmer working by the street. Lost, the driver asked the farmer, "sir, how do you get to Louisville?" The farmer replied, "well, normally, my brother takes me"

Subject: RE: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: cnd
Date: 01 Feb 22 - 08:53 AM

Oops, vice versa. The joke was told by Hurley, but he relayed it from Creason.

Subject: RE: New Age 'Arkansas Traveler' - any ideas
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 04 Feb 22 - 07:48 AM

One that Colum Sands has in one of his songs:
Traveller: How do I get to Bloggstown?
Farmer: If you want to go to that place, I wouldn’t start from here.