Big Mick needs a hand.

Subject: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Big Mick
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 01:08 AM

The mother-in-law of the Banjo player in my band is 90 years old, in the hospital, and probably not going to last much longer. She is the matriarch of a large family, and when she passes, I know that I will need to do a song. I wonder if you all could give me suggestions as to songs that would express the grief at the loss, and yet celebrate a life well lived by a woman. Bea is a wonder to behold, and Irish woman under full sail, and loved dearly by her family.

Suggestions, please.

Mick

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Alice
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 01:37 AM

Mick, this is very sad. At the moment, all I can think of is 'Farewell But Whenever You Welcome the Hour' or 'She Lived Beside the Anner', but you would have to judge if the latter is appropriate.

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Helen
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 01:45 AM

Hi Mick,

I know that this is a Welsh song, not Irish, but I love the lyrics and the tune - one of my all time favourite songs. It's called Calon Lan (Pure Heart) and it was originally on Barry Taylor's excellent tunebook site but that is now unfortunately closed down. But fortunately Lesley Nelson, the woman with one of the best music sites I know of on the net, has kindly taken it onto her site.

This is the address for the Welsh tunes - just click on the tune title to hear the midi, and to see the words.

http://www.contemplator.com/tunebook/wlshmidi.htm m

I'll copy the words in here if you need me to.

Also, I'm still thinking about whether I know any other good songs, but I'm not a singer so I don't remember words very well. Helen

Subject: Lyr Add: THE LIFE OF A MAN (OR WOMAN)
From: George Henderson
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 03:24 AM

Mick.

This is not an Irish song, but a very old English song. However, I have been singing it for years here in Ireland and everyone seems to enjoy it.

THE LIFE OF A MAN (OR WOMAN)

As I was a walking one morning with ease,
Viewing the leaves as they fell from the trees.
There in full motion appearing to be,
The leaves that had withered they fell from the tree.

Chorus
What is the life of a man any more than a leaf,
A man has his seasons so why should he grieve
All through his life he'll appear fine and gay,
Like a leaf he must wither and soon fade away.

If you had seen the leaves just a few days ago,
How beautiful and bright they did all seem to grow,
A rust came upon them and withered them all,
A storm came upon them and down they did fall

Chorus

If you look in the churchyard there you will see,
Those that have withered and fallen from the tree.
When age and affliction upon us do fall
Like a leaf we must wither and then we must fall.

Chorus.

The Clancy Brothers, with Tommy Makem, sang the Parting Glass holding hands round the graveside at Paddy's funeral last year. It seemed very fitting to me.

George

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Bill in Alabama
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 06:28 AM

The last time I worked with John McCutcheon he did an old hymn called GOING DOWN THE VALLEY, which we have used on such sombre occasions as this. We used MEETING IN THE AIR for another service, and my particular favorite is WHEN THEY RING THOSE GOLDEN BELLS. If this lady has a favorite hymn or song, that's always suitable.

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 08:13 AM

Will the Circle be unbroken is specifically about the death of a mother. Calon Lan is a great idea, Helen. I will ponder this some more when I get home and get back to you, Mick- this is a difficult but very wonderful gift for you to offer!
Allison

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Barbara Shaw
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 08:22 AM

Mick,

Hazel Dickens wrote a beautiful song called "Won't You Come and Sing for Me" which would let everyone join in for a last musical tribute to cheer the person's passing. This would be hard to do, but very moving and I think fitting.

How thoughtful of you to prepare for this.

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Barbara
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 08:36 AM

The one Barbara just mentioned, Who will Sing for Me? is wonderful. Another I like --if gospel is okay == is Precious Memories. (And if you want, I can do you the tunes for these, or for Life of a Man.
Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Bert
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 09:01 AM

Precious Lord is a good one.

Here's one that I wrote when my second wife died. goodbye

http://www.mudcat.org/bert/songs/goodbye.html

It's a bit personal so change it if you need to.

Ber.

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Night Owl
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 12:05 PM

Barbara & Barbara...the songs you each mentioned have wonderful lyrics and melodies....Hazel Dickens' song is very different than "Who Will Sing..." both great suggestions.

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Barbara
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 01:11 PM

Oh, that's right, Night Owl, and they're both fine songs. Funny, I can't keep the words to both of them in my head at the same time. Mick, something I always loved, both the song and the idea behind it, is "I Bid You Goodnight". It's a Bahamian song from Joseph Spence and the Pindar family that has a refrain sung by everyone and a couplet sung by the song leader. People often sing it these days at the end of an evening, but its purpose is to be a passing song for someone who is dying. Those present continue to sing as long as the person lives, and the leader keeps making up couplets.

Everyone sings: "And I bid you goodnight, goodnight, goodnight", and the occasional chorus:
"Won't you lay down my dear sister [brother; Brother Spence, etc],
Won't you lay and take your rest?
Won't you lay your head upon your savior's breast?
For I love you, but Jesus loves you the best,
And I bid you goodnight, goodnight, goodnight."

I can't imagine a more loving, supportive, nurturing way to leave the world.
Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Easy Rider
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 03:15 PM

The Grateful Dead sang this song, a-capella, as an encore, for several years. It's on the "Live Dead" album.

It's very soothing and beautiful.

EZR

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Barbara Shaw
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 05:16 PM

Another song that was traditionally sung at a time like this by folks from the Ozarks (and elsewhere) is "Angel Band." The family would gather around the bed of the dying person and sing this song to gently usher them to their "immortal home." A very beautiful song, recorded by many.

"Angel Band" and "Won't You Come and Sing for Me" are both in the DT, although I use slightly different words for "Won't You Come...."

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Banjer
Date: 18 Jun 99 - 07:57 PM

Mick, I don't know many of the Irish songs, but I have given instructions to whomever is to arrange the music at the time of my passing that I would like to have played as many of the old time gospel songs as they can squeeze in. Perhaps it would be fitting to find out what Bea's favorite songs are and do a few of them, more to celebrate her life tahn her passing. I know that music is a very important part of such a sad occasion. I was very distraught when, at the age of 18, I lost my best friend to a car accident. I don't recall much of the ceremony but I do remember very well the playing of the hymn, Whispering Hope. Whenever I think of Mike, I still hear that song. That was 32 years ago! God Bless you Mick for your thoughtfulness, and I'm sure that whatever you choose to play will be well received.

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: WyoWoman
Date: 19 Jun 99 - 12:33 AM

Hello, Big Mick, You might get a copy of Emmylou Harris' "Angel Band" CD, which has several of these tunes on it, including "Bright Morning Stars," which I sing a cappella. I have more words to it if you like the tune. It also has "Angel Band" and "When They Ring those Golden Bells" and ... well, several others that are simply lovely traditional Appalachian/bluegrassy songs.

KC

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Big Mick
Date: 19 Jun 99 - 10:36 PM

Hello Folks,

I get away from the old machine for a few days and come back to my friends help. Thanks a million, it is why I have insisted from almost the beginning of my time here that this is an amazing community of CARING people. I am only online a minute and must run off in a bit, but I will go through the suggestions very carefully.

Thanks again, you are all very special people.

Big Mick

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: Banjer
Date: 19 Jun 99 - 10:42 PM

Well, Hell, Mick.....YOU showed us something about caring during the recent Catspaw crisis.....Could we do less for you in your time of need?

Subject: RE: Big Mick needs a hand.
From: John in Brisbane
Date: 20 Jun 99 - 07:51 PM

Mick, I know that this is a very personal decision, but when you mention the words 'Irish matriarch' the song that immediately springs to mind is FOUR GREEN FIELDS. Some time ago someone posted the URL for the history and rules for an Irish wake. I would certainly appreciate seeing that link again.

Regards
John