BS: The Infection From Hell

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: jacqui.c
Date: 04 Dec 08 - 08:23 AM

Sounds good to me, but I'm not flying out on the same plane as you, you old bat,'cause I don't want to catch whatever it is you've got!

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: bfdk
Date: 04 Dec 08 - 08:35 AM

Glad to hear you're doing well enough to contemplate going gallivanting across the country, Sins!

However, I'll stay at a safe distance for the time being, too..

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: jacqui.c
Date: 04 Dec 08 - 10:20 PM

Looks like the Old Bat may have passed it on to me when I gave her a lift home from work last week.

I'm off to the doctor's tomorrow to get checked out and on to antibiotics, if it is the same thing, before my trip to the UK next week.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: kendall
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 07:18 AM

One year ago tomorrow I went into the hospital with a very serious case of strep, and if I get it again, heads will roll.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 08:01 AM

I don't have strep - tested and clean.
I ams till deaf in one ear. And enjoying my codeine. Two teaspoonfuls did thetrick. Fell asleep at 8:30PM and slept through the night for the first time in weeks. Technicolor dreams - or dreams about technicolor condoms and thongs. Very funny. You had to be there...

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 08:05 AM

Oh Jacqui - I hope not. Sore throat is the giveaway.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Bobert
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 08:15 AM

I knew I shouldn't have opened this thread... Now I got the green-goo, too... Man I feel terrible and I know that I caught it here...

B:~(

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 08:15 AM

Yesterday was end of week 4 with this mess. The Doxycyclin seems to be working, coughing less, sleeping more. Right ear still full. Evening time my kidneys hurt which makes me think UTI. What fun.

I think the worst has been I have been home from work all week and have not lifted one finger to housework. I have Mudcatted, Googled and practised mandolin. God the guilt.

Tsk tsk. A truckload of ironing awaits.

Ha ha!! I lie. The worse is I have missed 3 folk sessions in the last month. Sod the ironing.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 08:27 AM

I too have the kidney hurt and a blocked ear. It is really a problem at work where I have to see people's mouths to understand what they are saying. Hoping the antibiotics knock it all out of me. 11 days to go.

Reminder to all: Despite cajoling I did not attend a recent house concert or Thanksgiving dinner rather than risk infecting you.15 minutes in the car with Jacqui shouldn't have done it.



Kendall scares me - I need my head.

Bobert - is it coing out of your ears yet?

Subject: Lyr Add: I Got it From Agnes
From: Jeri
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 08:43 AM

I had a nice dinner at Acorns last night, courtesy of Curbat Mudgeoness (thank you), but mainly I just wanted to state that I am not sick. I do not have sniffilis and I feel GREAT. WOOHOO!!! I truly hope you feel better soon so you can experience the toxic-snot-free existence and joyful nasal inhalation that I now do.

---

Somehow, this song never got added here (unless it's hiding somewhere). I found it with the Wayback Machine and plucked in its entirety (with some HTML editing) from here.

---

I Got It From Agnes (1952)

This song was written by Tom in 1952, and performed by him throughout the 1950's, but he never included it on an album because he considered it too risqué at the time. In 1980, he revised it for inclusion in the stage revue of his songs called Tomfoolery, and notes that, although the revision made it naughtier, it seems fairly innocent by today's standards. The lyrics given here are from the revised Tomfoolery version. A studio version of this song recorded in 1996 can be found on the album Songs & More Songs by Tom Lehrer, available from Rhino Records.

I love my friends, and they love me,
We're just as close as we can be.
And just because we really care,
Whatever we get, we share!

I got it from Agnes,
She got it from Jim.
We all agree it must have been
Louise who gave it to him.

She got it from Harry,
Who got it from Marie,
And everybody knows that Marie
Got it from me.

Giles got it from Daphne,
She got it from Joan,
Who picked it up in County Cork,
A-kissin' the Blarney Stone.

Pierre gave it to Sheila,
Who must have brought it there.
He got it from Francois and Jacques,
Haha, Lucky Pierre!

Max got it from Edith,
Who gets it every spring.
She got it from her Daddy,
Who just gives her everything.

She then gave it to Daniel,
Whose spaniel has it now.
Our dentist even got it,
And we're still wondering how.

Ah, but I got it from Agnes,
Or maybe it was Sue,
Or Millie or Billie or Gillie or Willie,
It doesn't matter who.

It might have been at the club,
Or at the pub, or in the loo,
And if you will be my friend,
Then I might...(Mind you, I said "might")...
Give it to you!

---

Notes

Lehrer Comments:  "I Got it From Agnes was written in 1952. Originally it was I Got it From Sally. I used to sing that in nightclubs, but I didn't put it on records because I didn't want to be identified with so-called 'party records' like those by Ruth Wallis, Rusty Warren, Redd Foxx. I didn't want to be in that bin. When Cameron Mackintosh asked if there was anything else in the trunk that they could use for Tomfoolery, I polished
it up, wrote a new verse, and made it more like a British music-hall song. Of course, that was all before anybody had heard of AIDS." --1996 Interview

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Bobert
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 11:45 AM

No, Sins... Not yet, anyway but if that green-goo comes outta my ears that would make it almost worth gettin' sick just to behold such a sight...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 12:22 PM

Now I am in BIG TROUBLE. Just spoke with Mrs. Morse and she is toxic. If Kendall gets this I will be banned to the cellar for a lifetime.


So sorry...

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: kendall
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 01:51 PM

Leprosy, night and day you torture me,
There goes my eyeball right into my highball...

There goes my fingernail right into my ginger ale...

Hear the song of a sailor, 'tis an old song, learned at sea.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 02:06 PM

Any tips for stopping the dry heaves in their tracks? I have had two 15 minute bouts today. Afraid I am going to crack my ribs.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: gnu
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 02:17 PM

Burnt toast and bitter jam.... or drugs.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Amos
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 02:30 PM

Send me a little bit of nail, Skipper.


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Helen
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 02:37 PM

Hi Sinsull,

I had much the same as you for a couple of months. The ears were the worst part. Antibiotics stopped the sinus headache but had no effect at all on the blocked ears. It felt like my head was full of glue.

A few people at work are also suffering from the blocked ears, among other symptoms.

I went and bought some over-the-counter nasal spray for hayfever and hey (hay) presto! the blocked ears started to unblock. Two months of blocked ears was hell. The cure was quick and effective. The brand I bought is called Beconase (in Oz). It works by reducing inflammation and I think that was the problem because I had very little of the runny-nose symptoms. In your case - the Green Goo Syndrome - maybe it would not help but for me it was little short of a miracle.

Maybe worth a try.

Helen

I wish you the Oz cure: tea, sympathy, and eucalyptus oil steam inhalations (antiseptic properties in eucalyptus, and helps to unblock everything nasal-related)

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 02:58 PM

Tam,
Flat ginger ale or Pepsi sometimes helps. Tiny tiny sips.
Also deep breaths.

had that last week at the office. YUK!
M

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Bobert
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 04:27 PM

"Head full of glue", Helen??? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm??? Now that's one rememdy I forgot all about... Glue therapy... I got some real decent vynal adhesive out in the tool room... Think I'll go a have a short visit with it an' see if that opens stuff up... Used to work purdy good...

Thanks...

B

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 04:31 PM

It opens up your horizons not your nasal passages.


And don't smoke while you are sniffing.

M

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 04:56 PM

owwww. it is the deep breaths getting me into trouble.. starts the wracking cough then the heaving. love ginger ale. I have only been drinking water, cranberry drink and Earl Grey.

Do they have ginger ale in UK. Must check that now.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: kendall
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 08:17 PM

I may start a shit storm with this thought, but I've weathered many a gale, here it is.

They say that God said, "Let us create man in our own image."
No, who can imagine God with diarrhea?
Sorry, but such things keep me awake nights.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: jacqui.c
Date: 05 Dec 08 - 10:53 PM

Of course there is ginger ale in the UK, as well as ginger beer - lovely stuff!

Doctor tells me this is just a cold so I'm hoping that it should be clearing by the time I fly to the UK.

In the meantime Kendall is looking after me very well, but won't come too close for fear of catching it.

Sniff.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 07 Dec 08 - 09:48 PM

Jacqui - hope you feel better before you fly -- at the price of plane tickets, you damn well better feel well before you get on the plane and you better enjoy the free drinks (the food is still ghastly)....

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: jacqui.c
Date: 08 Dec 08 - 10:19 AM

The cold seems to have passed over, thank heavens!

I eat at the airport - steak and salad - and then pass on the airline meal. I DO have the free wine though!

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 08 Dec 08 - 11:25 PM

Ah yes, with your dietary restrictions that is probably a GOOD decision. Say hi to the Queen for me....

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Amos
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 09:19 AM

They say that God said, "Let us create man in our own image."
No, who can imagine God with diarrhea?


Skipper, haven't you heard of the Big Bang?


A

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 09:24 AM

Still ear infected.
WHIIIINE!

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Mr Red
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:58 PM

eat plenty of garlic. It is a mild anitsceptic, and a strong anti-social

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 01:00 PM

Again with the garlic - I am not a vampire.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: ranger1
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 05:34 PM

What, Jason's chicken soup didn't cure you? Or are you just angling for more soup and sympathy?

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Barry Finn
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 06:41 PM

"Still ear infected"

Did you do lobster?? No? "When will they ever learn, when will they ever,,,,,,

Barry

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 09:18 PM

No Barry - it is not failing to do the lobsters that has done her in ..... it is ignoring your wonderful advice about bat stew......!

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 09:31 PM

Okay, that does it. Here are some cures from my home town, warranted genuine and copied from "Folk-Lore of Adams County, Illinois" (NY: Alma Eigens Hyatt Foundation, 1935), p. 241ff:

4983. Heat cow manure in sweet milk, then place this in a bag and tie it against the ear for earache.

4986. Cure earache by keeping the ear filled with goose grease.

4995. Fry a piece of rabbit fat and put one drop of the grease in the ear for earache.

4999. As an earache remedy, use skunk oil.

5006. A little urine rubbed in the ear will cure earache.

5010. Stop a girl's earache by inserting into her ear a few drops of urine from a boy.

Now, if these don't do it let me know. There are more cures to try.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 08:50 AM

Lordy, that last post reminded me of that old folk song:

My momma said not to put pee in my ear,
Pee in my ear....

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 09:22 AM

Fortunately, my ear is starting to clear. But I will make a note of that for future reference, Rap.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 11:58 AM

Mary,
Lobsters disgust me, Barry.

For Peter Gray, and Somers too, though certainly in trade,
Were properly particular about the friends they made;
And somehow thus they settled it without a word of mouth --
That Gray should take the northern half, while Somers took the South.

On Peter's portion oysters grew -- a delicacy rare,
But oysters were a delicacy Peter couldn't bear,
On Somers' side was turtle, on the shingle lying thick,
Which Somers couldn't eat, because it always made him sick.

Gray gnashed his teeth with envy as he saw a mighty store,
Of turtle unmolested on his fellow-creature's shore.
The oysters at his feet aside impatiently he shoved,
For turtle and his mother were the only things he loved.

From W S Gilbert's 'Etiquette'

Not quite lobsters, & It doesn't help the symptoms, but it may raise a smile.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 02:29 PM

I am still doing the dry heave bob n weave over the big white tureen.

I WANT TO BE WELL -OH

A well-oh
A well-oh
I want to be Well-oh

gonna make this mantra into a sea shanty

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 02:32 PM

There is one - "Dramamine"

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 08:03 AM

I think it's over...3+ weeks.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: gnu
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 02:53 PM

STILL??!! Owwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Maybe some good whiskey ear drops?

Poor dear. I hope you can remain sane thru this.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 03:34 PM

TEa Tree Oil, a few drops in the ear before sleeping. Assuming you CAN sleep.



A

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 03:54 PM

Hamlet's uncle dripped poison into Hamlet's daddy's ears.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: gnu
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:10 PM

Already been suggested, Rap... whiskey.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:26 PM

There was a really gruesome episode of tHRILLER IN THE 60S - A GUY FALLS FOR A MISSIONARY'S WIFE IN THE MI9DDLE OF aFRICA. sHE IS NOT INTERESTED AND LOVES HER "OLDER" HUSBAND. dAMN cAPSLOCK!
Anyway, the would be suitor bribes a local to put an earwig in the husband's ear while he sleeps. This is a special earwig. It eats its way through your brain in a straight path. By the time it comes out the other ear, you're dead.

Of course the earwig gets put in the wrong ear and the Lotherio ends up screaming in pain for a few weeks as this thing chomps its way through his brain. BUT he survives and the earwig comes out the other side.

No one is celebrating his recovery and he thinks he is up on a attepted murder charges but the sad truth is "It was a female and she laid her eggs in your brain. They will hatch in a day or two and..."


That might work.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:44 PM

Mary - is Alice sitting on your keyboard again!!!! Are you home sick or is your work day over...hope work is safe.......

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Becca72
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:57 PM

I thought staying away from you infected people would work, but one must have slipped through and now I'VE come down with something. Chest cold (extra fun for this asthmatic) with a nagging cough and lots of post-nasal drip. HARUMPH!! At least my ears don't hurt.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: SINSULL
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 11:07 AM

You got that from Jacqui. Mine starts with a vicious sore throat. And no - I still can't hear out of my left ear. 12 hours in a 45 degree house didn't help.

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Becca72
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 11:46 AM

I think I brought mine back from CT with me from my weekend away. I haven't seen Jacqui recently enough to blame her (I stopped over on the evening of the 8th thinking she was leaving on the 9th but there she was gone!). :-)

Subject: RE: BS: The Infection From Hell
From: Amos
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 11:54 AM

Geeze, wotta crowd--ya suggest something helpful and you get back pictures of brain-eating earwigs. Wow!! Tough house, man.


A