Folklore: Concertina Weasels

Subject: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Jack Blandiver
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 04:21 AM

On the news this morning I listened with interest to a feature on the last remaining Lancashire farm dedicated to the breeding of Concertina Weasels, a sub-species of Mustela nivalis selectively bread for their strong yet supple pelts which are used in the construction of superior concertina bellows. Seemingly, if you want to know if your concertina is made from weasel leather, you must look inside, where, on the very finest models, the fur is still on. Generally it's only the English Concertina that used weasel leather, though a number of quality Anglos use it too. It doesn't come cheap, but as one concertina maker pointed out, it is as much about preserving the ancient family tradition of weasel farming as it is about the quality of the musical instrument. Sadly, the feature was prompted by the attention drawn by animal rights protesters who have set up camp on the wayside by the farm entrance (near Glasson Dock) several of whom had been arrested after the farm had been broken into during the night and much of the breeding stock let loose into the wild giving rise to fears of feral concertina weasels.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Micca
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 04:28 AM

Of Course the weasel is weasily distinguished from the stoat, whixch is stoatily different

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Folkiedave
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 04:35 AM

I missed this. Is it on "Listen Again"? Which station?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: pavane
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:01 AM

Probably only on the island of San Serife

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:04 AM

Reminds me of the spaghetti weavil that Richard Dimbleby reported on all those years ago ...

I wonder if there's any connection.

I think we should be told.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:08 AM

As a concertina restorer I am very upset that the press have chosen to expose this last remaining supplier of genuine weasel pelt. It is astonishingly expensive, but then again so are some concertinas and for some instruments only the very best will do.
I fear that now the 'Weasel is out of the bag' so to speak, I shall have to revert to supplies of the slightly lower quality Ferret Leather. The ferret is another Mustelid and the best grades come from female polecat ferrets. This leather has been used as a substitute since the 1860s, indeed its use was so common as to lead the the concertina being nicknamed the "Leather Ferret" This animal is far easier to breed and handle and the pelt is significantly larger. The pelt was traditionally cured in a mixtute of bran, pureed cat brain and urine. (This aslo gives concertinas their distinctive odour)

Animal protesters want tying up and throwing into a pit full of starving rats!!

Dave

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: The Borchester Echo
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:11 AM

Yes, the Grauniad had an entire supplement about the concertina construction industry in Sans Serif. It is located amid fields of waving spaghetti.

French makers have experimented with fish skins for bellows though only, I believe, in the month of April.

Some concertina players are renowned for their weasel words.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Will Fly
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:12 AM

Stoats and ferrets are weasily confused.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST,john
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:12 AM

Having ascertained that the inside of the bellows of my concertina are non-hairy. How do I put my concertina back together?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: MartinRyan
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:29 AM

If it's not hairy on the inside - it's not worth reassembling!

Regards

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: SteveMansfield
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:32 AM

My concertina was made by Weaselstone

Having ascertained that the inside of the bellows of my concertina are non-hairy. How do I put my concertina back together?
If you've lost the originals you'll have to go down the meerkat and buy some more screws.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: MartinRyan
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:41 AM

Think I should change the spelling of my name for the day that's in it.

Regards

Marten

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 06:10 AM

Ferrets can make a substitute for the weasels, but not every restorer believes in them. Clap your hands if you believe in ferrets.

Valmai (English treble and baritone)

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Bernard
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 06:12 AM

I have a water otter in my kitchen...

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Bernard
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 06:14 AM

...and I had Chicken Tarka for my tea last night!

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Micca
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 06:17 AM

A paper in the recent edition of "Must-have Mustelines (incorporating Ferret Fanciers Monthly)" seems to be suggesting that experiments are taking place in the dark recesses of New Hampshire (a well-known haven for box players) on using specially bred Fishers as a substitute, after finding (by Experiment) that Beaver pelts were too watertight and didnt breathe sufficiently well. Also there is the marketing angle, after all, given the distinctive odour Who would buy a Beaver Concertina? The advantages in Fisher pelts being their Larger size and the superior quality. Maybe some enterprising Brit could start a trade with North America in the importing of animal pelts?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 06:29 AM

I made one out of mongoose fur once, I had it for years before I was persuaded to sell it for a vast amount of cash a travelling cobra charmer ...

... sadly before I got to spend the cash I was mugged and later found myself swaying from side to side in someones laundry basket ...

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 06:41 AM

That's a relief, I thought it said "Concertina weevils". I was worried about a new form of woodworm attacking our instruments!

Nigel
(VAT was introduced in UK on 1st April 1973, a suspicious occasion)

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Bernard
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 07:07 AM

Hollowed-out armadillos would make excellent concertinas, methinks...

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 07:13 AM

Correct me if I'm wrong, Bernard, but isn't it said that Chicken Tarka is like Chicken Tikka, but otter?

Valmai

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Black belt caterpillar wrestler
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 07:28 AM

I have heard that the gathering at the Royal insist that ermine is the best, which leads me to suspect that "Aunt Clara" is a secret concertina player.

Anyone use mink?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: The Sandman
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 07:33 AM

AprilFool.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: gnu
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 07:35 AM

Can you still hear the weasels, Clara?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Ross Campbell
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 07:45 AM

The first sign of madness is beieving that the inside of your concertina is hairy.

The second sign is opening it up to check.

For Guest, John, an encouraging word - there is only one right way to put a concertina back together, and that's to avoid the thirty-five wrong ways.

Actually, that figure is only for when you've taken one end off a six-sided concertina to examine the hairiness or otherwise of the bellows. For each additional disassembly stage, the figure should be multiplied by six (at least).

Ross

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Micca
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 08:15 AM

B-belt, EVERYONE knows mink is mainly used for lining Codpieces!!!

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Mr Happy
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 08:20 AM

If you require miking up of your squeezebox, try Swansea Electronic, in order that your instrument may be heard playing it's canonicals sweeter   

Scenical stoneware is popular on the current Newcastle scenario since the I.E.S. town clearances & the re-siting of the ancient lowercases.

The severe winter weather prompted the snowiest clearance and local firm Lawrence Canoeists provided specialist help in the sewer cancelations which had been prone to conceal wateriness /i<>

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: pavane
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 08:57 AM

To quote from the Ballad of Brian Boru

"You've had your way long enough,
It's the hairy side outside tonight"

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST, topsie
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 08:59 AM

"The pelt was traditionally cured in a mixtute of bran, pureed cat brain and urine. (This aslo gives concertinas their distinctive odour)"


That explains the anguished sounds my cat makes when I try to play my concertina.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: MartinRyan
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 09:54 AM

No, no - she's just trying to sing along appropriately...

Regards

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 10:03 AM

Actually her concertina is made from her cat ...

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Mr Happy
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 10:12 AM

No wonder it bellows!!

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 10:21 AM

Actually her concertina is made from her cat ...
...and is the skin of her pussy flexible enough?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: CarolC
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 10:39 AM

I just now told JtS about this, and he said, "the finest Newfoundland concertina and accordion bellows are made from white coat (baby) harp seals".

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 11:31 AM

.... now which topic shall I go off on .......



.... I just can't make up my mind .....



.... clubbing baby harp seals or the elasticity of topsies pussy ....



dither dither

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: MartinRyan
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 11:34 AM

Would that be "folk-clubbing harp seals" or do you favour more traditional methods?

Regards

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Lox
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 11:40 AM

I suppose while baby Harp Seals are useful to make concertinas then adult harp seals are better for making ... erm ... pianos?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Bernard
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 11:42 AM

My seals are lipped...

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: DMcG
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 11:44 AM

I thought the bellows of the protype English concertina were made from lab. coats?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 11:48 AM

I thought the bellows of the protype English concertina were made from lab. coats?
Cruelty to labradors!

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: MartinRyan
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 11:50 AM

yeah - not even left in peace in death...

Regards

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Harmonium Hero
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 11:50 AM

No, that's a misprint; it's Loab Cats.





I'll get me lab coat...
JK.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Rowan
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:27 PM

Macropods make better bellows leather than mustelids, so my Jeffries says.

The dance tunes certainly get a lot of bounce.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: The Vulgar Boatman
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 05:44 PM

My missus prefers it hairy side outside for playing outdoors...

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Bernard
Date: 01 Apr 09 - 06:35 PM

Hmmm... the lab coats would explain why 'tinas have buttons...

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Micca
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 04:30 AM

If That is so Bernard, where are the pens, screwdrivers, Spatulae, bits of paper, labels and assorted other paraphenalia that usually occupy the pockets (where are the pockets too?) of my Lab coat?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST, topsie
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 05:22 AM

This has the makings of a plot for a detective novel - the vital bit of evidence hidden inside the (pocket) bellows of a concertina.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 06:38 AM

As any fule kno,concertinas do not have pockets because they are not marsupials.

Strongly suspect that Mustelidian is a hitherto undiscovered musical mode.

Valmai

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Micca
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 06:38 AM

What a range of suspects you would have Topsie!! so many people with murder in their hearts for somone playing the concertina!!

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Harmonium Hero
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 07:06 AM

Colonel Mustard, in the library, with a banjo....
JK

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 07:25 AM

Miss Ccarlet, In the Bedroom, with a flute

Oh, sorry, I must have been thinking of a quote from 'American Pie'!

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST, topsie
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 08:27 AM

... the victim strangled - and the only clue to the perpetrator: it was someone with long fingernails on only one hand - was it the guitarist?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Bernard
Date: 02 Apr 09 - 10:34 AM

Micca... you should know better than to ask! You've seen the contents of my 'tina cases! Yes, folks, they contain... 'tinas!!

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Gurney
Date: 03 Apr 09 - 12:51 AM

Those breeders are determined people. It took years of inbreeding to get half-hexagonal rib-cages on the weasels.



Our cats hate the concertina, too.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: SylviaN
Date: 03 Apr 09 - 02:49 AM

I must add a warning to this thread - someone tried to sell me a beautiful looking concertina, that had a white stripe down the middle of the bellows. It was alright until you started playing it, and then the smell was just awful!

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Valmai Goodyear
Date: 03 Apr 09 - 09:14 AM

For a place to compare breeds, try the thread headed 'Concertina sessions at Fareham Easter Fest'.

Valmai (Lewes)

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: JeffB
Date: 03 Apr 09 - 03:15 PM

I looked inside my comcertina to see if it had hairy weasel skin, but5 it was bear.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Steve Gardham
Date: 03 Apr 09 - 03:44 PM

I think the bellows on me bass anglo must be pigskin judging by the noises it makes.

Ooh me bellows 'anglo an I swing 'em to an' fro,
I can tie em in a knot, I can tie em in a bow,
Ooh, I get a funny feeling whem I scrape em on the ceiling,
Ooh, I get a funny feeling when me bellows 'anglo.

tune, College Hornpipe

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: Gurney
Date: 04 Apr 09 - 02:50 AM

Silvia, that bellowsleather had been cured with woad, the warpaint of the ancient (and unwashed) Britons.



You can often see a white line down the middle of the woad.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: JeffB
Date: 04 Apr 09 - 08:24 AM

Sorry, there were some typos in my post yesterday. I should have said that I looked inside my concertina but it was bare of hare.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: maeve
Date: 01 Apr 12 - 07:41 AM

This seems to be a good day for this thread's revival.

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: The Sandman
Date: 01 Apr 12 - 07:51 AM

Ihave heard of a ferret who plays the concertina

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: GUEST,Suibhne Astray
Date: 01 Apr 12 - 08:16 AM

Ha! A timely revival if e'er I saw one... Actually this all started off with a spot of banter in a session with the redoubtable Rob Malaney o' Moffat who was complaining of extraneous wind noises from his trusty Lachenal - so concertina wheezes became concertina weasels and we free-styled an entire routine which I summarise in my OP.

Was that really 4 years ago?

Subject: RE: Folklore: Concertina Weasels
From: keberoxu
Date: 01 Apr 20 - 10:57 AM

It's April Fool's Day all over again.