Obit: Kaelan Paton(Sandy&Caroline's grandson) 2009

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: GUEST,Todd and Evie
Date: 23 Jun 09 - 07:32 PM

Feel very out of touch with Dave but am aching to reach out and hold him. Such a profoundly sad time....our thoughts have been with you all over the past week. The mighty river has broken our hearts.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: lisa null
Date: 23 Jun 09 - 08:40 PM

I keep wishing I could be with you all, a silent and helpful friend sharing what words cannot. Songs keep flowing in and out of my mind, Last night I sat alone on the back deck and sang at the moon for you, for Kaelan, for us all. "His bright smile haunts me still."

I'll be in touch again when th madness subsides, Lisa

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Gweltas
Date: 23 Jun 09 - 08:55 PM

Kind thoughts and prayers are with all of the family from Cornwall in the UK. May God give you comfort and consolation at this sorrowful time.
XX

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: GUEST,laura schmidt classmate of david
Date: 23 Jun 09 - 09:01 PM

my heart breaks for you all.because i went to school with david i know the love of your family. i wish you peace and love at this terrible time and always

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body fo
From: GUEST,Riki Schneyer
Date: 23 Jun 09 - 09:16 PM

Words fail...Everything I try to say sounds just plain stupid. I'm just so sorry. Milan and I send big, big love to all of you.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body fo
From: GUEST,nomi solo
Date: 23 Jun 09 - 09:36 PM

dear sandy and caroline,
a hero's death, we can never be prepared for such sadness. our daughter reminded us of a small memorial in london england called postman's park. This memorial began with an idea by g.f. watts who in 1887 wrote to the "Times" proposing a project to mark the queen's jubilee. he stated it would be of national interest to collect a complete record of the stories of heroism in every-day life. though his idea was not taken up officially, he himself commemorated the actions by erecting this park, a 50 foot long gallery with a tiled roof. here are engraved on tiles names of many youths who gave their lives in heroic actions.
may we all remember kaelan, with or without a tile, but in our hearts and our actions.
with loving sympathy
nomi and dick solo

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body fo
From: Guy Wolff
Date: 23 Jun 09 - 09:42 PM

Hello Sandy and Caroline,

I am so sorry to hear this and an amazed with the power of the river this time of year he saved his friend .It shows what kind of young man he was . You have so much to be proud of in your grief . Tons of love to you both and let David know how very sorry I am . What a terrible loss , Yours Guy

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body fo
From: Janie
Date: 23 Jun 09 - 10:09 PM

Wish I had words of wisdom and solace, but I don't.

I don't know how you as parents and grandparents live with the blinding pain of such startling and unimaginable loss - except that somehow you do - because regardless of the pain, you wake in the morning.

The heart beats, unbidden. The breath breathes, even in those times that hit literally like a knife in the gut, and you think that you just can not bear it. Those times when the imagination runs wild, then you realize you have to reel it in.

For what it is worth, remember this.   It is true regardless of spiritual belief or the lack there of.   Kaelan is free from all suffering. Whether he is in a "better place", or dwells now only in your hearts, he is OK.   Free of pain.   Free of suffering.

Remember that.

Remember that he abides always in your hearts and memories. Remember that he lives on in every life that he touched, in every memory that anyone has of him. We are as shaped and influenced by the young as much as by the old.   If in no other way, each of us is immortal in that the effect of our lives on others does indeed ripple out in wider and wider circles, and down through generations.

I don't know you, Sandy and Caroline. I only know who you are, and doubt seriously that you recall me from our brief introductions at a Getaway.   Regardless, the simple act of reading this thread, contemplating your loss, reading the posts of those who do know you, your family, and Kaelan, changes and influences me, as it does everyone who reads here.   Kaelan lives on, even in someone like me, who never knew him at all.

Nothing that I write here can touch your pain and loss, but in the event it brings some measure of comfort in the midst of your terrible pain in the time ahead, I wanted to share these thoughts.

Janie

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: JennieG
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 12:46 AM

Sandy and Caroline, we have never met but you are in my thoughts and prayers.

JennieG

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Paul Burke
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 02:02 AM

Hopefully with time you can take some good from the tragedy. Celebrate his life while regretting it was so short.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 07:59 AM

So sorry to have read this. Sincere condolences.

May he rest in the arms of the Great Mother, and know the All Father's smile.

May the Great Mother and the All Father comfort you, and bring you Peace eventually.

So mote it be.

Love and Blessings, Erica and Bryn

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body fo
From: Elijah Browning
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 09:04 AM

what needs to be said there are no words for.
All our love from the Chris and Kat Thieme and family.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: wysiwyg
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 03:34 PM

There's a parish supper tonight that I expect to be full of young people. I'll be thinking of Ezra and Kaelan as I circulate, which will be a form of walking prayer for their families.

(((Paton Clan)))

(((Morse Clan)))

~S~

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Ebbie
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 03:36 PM

This sentiments of this song were a comfort to my sister when her daughter died. May it help just a little bit now.

          Alive and Well
                                    Ebbie

I heard my mother as she lay dying speak
of winged angels that fears dispelled
And though in sorrow my heart is crying
I know her spirit is alive and well

       For as sure as the bright sun and the stars above me
       As sure as stories that people tell
       I know the spirit that's giving and loving
       I know it will always be alive and well
        Oh, I know it will always be alive and well

Though loved ones' passing may leave me lonely
As one by one they heed that bell
Still I'll remember one glad thought only:
I know their spirits are alive and well

When breath forsakes me and none can hold me
(And when that may be, no tongue can tell)
And though my heart cease, that will set my soul free
And I know that I'll always be alive and well.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Partridge
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 05:31 PM

there are no adequate words, just so very sorry - I cant imagine the loss

much love xxxxx
Patrish

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: SussexCarole
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 06:59 PM

All our love to you all at such a sad time. "Sweet Dove of Peace"

Carole & Andrew x

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 10:27 PM

Many years ago, one of my first influences of traditional music came from a lovely album I rescued from a library sale in my new home near Chapel Hill NC.

I learned a song from it, and brought it to my first Getaway, not brave enough to sing in front of people, but hoping to hear it. Where the first workshop I went to was led by Caroline Paton, who of course already knew the song because it was a Folk-Legacy album.

Naturally.

And as you can imagine, she gracefully encouraged me to sing it.

Tonight I met with a group of people with whom I now often sing, mostly traditional music. We sang song after song of love and devotion, and redemption, the here and the hereafter. I though how different and difficult, and at the same time how amazingly healing the music will be for you, Caroline, and for Sandy, and for all the people you love.

Don't ever lose sight of the power and beauty you have brought to the world, including but not exclusively that of your beautiful grandson. All the sorrow and sadness cannot erase one speck of the grace, and love you have wrought, and which surrounds you tonight.

I sang this for you all tonight, sending love:

_____________________

We'll camp a little while in the wilderness
in the wilderness
in the wilderness
We'll camp a little while in the wilderness
then we'll be going home

Then we'll be going home, oh!
we'll be going home
We'll camp a little while in the wilderness
then we'll be going home.
____________________________________

Dani

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jun 09 - 10:38 PM

There are no words. Just know that we all care.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: alison
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 02:48 AM

so very sorry - thinking of you all at this time

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: freda underhill
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 07:42 AM

yes, a great tragedy, my thoughts with you as well.

freda

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: wysiwyg
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 12:50 PM

Any word yet on arrangements?

~Susan

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: karen k
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 08:38 PM

Sunday, July 12, 2009 1pm - 7pm Hosatonic Valley Regional High School. Service, meal, music and a contradance. All are welcome.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Gorgeous Gary
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 08:49 PM

*hugs* and deepest sympathies.

-- Gary

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: emjay
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 08:55 PM

I cannot even imagine the pain and the sadness. My heart goes out to this family and I have tears in my eyes for family and this young man though I've never met any of them.
Martie

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: topical tom
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 09:00 PM

Sandy, Caroline, and family: I am so sorry that this happened. I know that there's nothing we can really say to alleviate the grief but, as someone so aptly put it, words are all we have. Love and prayers are in my heart for you.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: bbc
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 09:27 PM

Yes, Susan. A memorial, open to all, is planned for Sunday, July 12th at Housatonic Valley Regional High School
in Falls Village, CT, from 1-7 pm. It will start with a memorial service & then progress to a song circle, a vegetarian potluck meal (in memory of Kaelan), & a contra dance. Kaelan's dad, David, hopes that this may become an annual event, in Kaelan's memory. Duane & I visited Sandy & Caroline today & helped get some cds ready for the Old Songs Festival. We saw David today for the first time since Kaelan's death. Naturally, he & his folks are still actively grieving. It was good to be with them. A non-profit fund has been established to help with the family's expenses at this time (Simple cremation costs more than $2,000). If you wish to contribute, checks can be made out to "Kaelan Paton Memorial Fund" & can be mailed "Care of" Sandy & Caroline Paton, Folk-Legacy Records, Box 1148, Sharon, CT 06069. Buying music from Folk Legacy, either online or at the Old Songs Festival, will also help out.

best,

Barbara

---

The memorial for Kaelan on 7/12 has been relocated from the Housatonic Valley Regional High School to Sharon Center School - on Hilltop Road in Sharon.(Posted at Sandy Paton's request)

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Greg B
Date: 25 Jun 09 - 09:58 PM

Good-night, sweet prince; And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: karen k
Date: 26 Jun 09 - 05:10 PM

Correction to bbc's post above:
The tax deductible fund being set up by the Paton's local bank in Kaelan's name is to be an education trust fund for Kaelan's two younger sisters, Shannon, 13 and Juliana, 10. Kaelan's dad David and sister Linnea will agree together on how and when any funds are used. The fund will not be used for family living expenses.

The family notes that anyone who can join them July 12th for Kaelan's memorial celebration is very welcome.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: karen k
Date: 26 Jun 09 - 05:22 PM

Oops - one additional note. In order to obtain tax-deductible status on any contribution, checks must be made out to "Kaelan Paton Memorial Fund."

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body fo
From: Ken Schatz
Date: 26 Jun 09 - 06:37 PM

My thoughts are with Kaelan, Linnea, David, and Sandy and Caroline and all the Paton family. I am so sorry to hear it.

Love to you all,
Ken Schatz

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body fo
From: GUEST,Guest David Jones
Date: 26 Jun 09 - 09:49 PM

I can't imagine the pain of losing a child. Words collected by Gale Huntington come to mind,

"Row on Row on another day may shine with brighter light,
Ply Ply the oars and pull away, there's dawn beyond the night".

Love to David, Sandy and Caroline.

David Jones

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: katlaughing
Date: 26 Jun 09 - 11:55 PM

I have a stupid question? Is Linnea also our Mudcat linnea? Just wondering. Thanks.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: open mike
Date: 27 Jun 09 - 03:26 AM

How wonderful that Kaelan's memory will be honored by a vegetarian feast and contra dancing.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: My guru always said
Date: 28 Jun 09 - 02:47 AM

Kaelan has been in our thoughts along with all his family and friends. We visited Postman's Park in London (nomi solo mentioned it earlier) a couple of days ago and read the tiles there. I thought that maybe others would like to read them here too, so I took some photos (you'll need to zoom) and added them to my photo page.
Hil

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Celtaddict
Date: 29 Jun 09 - 11:09 PM

I know there are no words that can help someone bear the unbearable. But Sandy, Caroline, David, Robin, Linnea, you are in my thoughts, and in the hearts of many. Peace.
Janet

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: GUEST,Susan Tanner
Date: 02 Jul 09 - 01:09 PM

Sandy and Caroline:

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your entire family at this very difficult time. I know it must be small consolation to know that your grandson is a hero to his friends, and to those of us he never met for his bravery and quick actions. May he watch over all of us.

With my deepest and sincere sympathies,
Susan

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: open mike
Date: 02 Jul 09 - 01:33 PM

Reminder..all are welcome to join the memorial which is planned for
Sunday, July 12th at Housatonic Valley Regional High School
in Falls Village, CT, from 1-7 pm.
memorial service, song circle, a vegetarian potluck & contra dance.

Kaelan's dad, David, hopes that this may become an annual event,
in Kaelan's memory.

A non-profit fund has been established. If you wish to contribute, checks can be made out to "Kaelan Paton Memorial Fund" & mailed
"Care of" Sandy & Caroline Paton, Folk-Legacy Records, Box 1148, Sharon, CT 06069. Buying music from Folk Legacy, will also help out.

The tax deductible fund being set up by the Paton's local bank in Kaelan's name is to be an education trust fund for Kaelan's two younger sisters, Shannon, 13 and Juliana, 10.

---

The memorial for Kaelan on 7/12 has been relocated from the Housatonic Valley Regional High School to Sharon Center School - on Hilltop Road in Sharon.(Posted at Sandy Paton's request)

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Barry Finn
Date: 02 Jul 09 - 03:59 PM

Thanks open Mike, though I only knew David slighlty over the yrs & knew Sandy & Caroline much better, I do see some of David's old friends from many yrs back & will pass this along to them

Barry

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 03 Jul 09 - 08:18 AM

Like the rest of this comunity, I don't to know what to say, can't imagine how you are all feeling, sending hugs is all I can do.

(((())))

RtS

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: GUEST,maddy
Date: 03 Jul 09 - 04:25 PM

The memorial for Kaelan on 7/12 has been relocated from the Housatonic Valley Regional High School to Sharon Center School - on Hilltop Road in Sharon.(Posted at Sandy Paton's request)

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: open mike
Date: 03 Jul 09 - 04:41 PM

i hope everyone gets notified of the change of venue
Sharon Center School 80 Hilltop Road in Sharon, CT

it looks like it is near Hwy 41, a.k.a. North Main St.

perhaps a mud elf could change the thread title?

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: JohnB
Date: 03 Jul 09 - 06:16 PM

No one should have to go through this with a child, let alone a grandchild.
Please accepy my heartfelt condolences to ALL the family.
JohnB.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Crowhugger
Date: 03 Jul 09 - 09:56 PM

I'm yet another at a loss for words. To Sandy & Caroline my deepest condolences.
Val.

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton-Sandy & Caroline's grdson(body found)
From: Eve Goldberg
Date: 03 Jul 09 - 10:46 PM

Sandy and Caroline,

You and your family are in my thoughts. My deepest condolences to all of you.

Sending lots of love,

Eve

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton(Sandy&Caroline)Mem.Sharon Ctr School
From: GUEST,Liz Lewis
Date: 04 Jul 09 - 02:26 PM

Dear Paton family,

I just heard the sad, sad news via an e-mail from Bill Lehrman. You are all in my thoughts and prayers. I won't be able to make it on the 12th, but know that I'll be with you in spirit.

Much love,

Liz

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton(Sandy&Caroline)Mem.Sharon Ctr School
From: bbc
Date: 04 Jul 09 - 09:06 PM

Thanks, maddy & open mike. We were surprised at the change & just spoke with Caroline. Evidently, repairs need to be done at the high school--hence the change. For those who may want to Mapquest directions, the zip code is 06069-2150.

best,

bbc

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton(Sandy&Caroline)Mem.Sharon Ctr School
From: Nancy King
Date: 04 Jul 09 - 10:40 PM

I wish I could be with you on the 12th, but it is not to be. Just know I'll be there in spirit, thinking of your family with sympathy and love.

Nancy

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton(Sandy&Caroline)Mem.Sharon Ctr Sch
From: GUEST,Pamela from Ithaca
Date: 05 Jul 09 - 07:45 PM

At the time of Kaelen's Memorial next Sunday I'll be singing a concert at our local
Hospice Center in Ithaca. My way of being there in spirit will be to sing Blessed Quietness
in Kaelen's honor. I've been deeply moved by the loss of this young man, and by the gathering of a deep a broad community of music and dance... not to mention the generosity
and good hearts of Kaelen's friends on Facebook.

Sandy and Caroline, I do wish that I could be there to offer you hugs. All I can offer is my deepest love for you both.

Pamela

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton(Sandy&Caroline)Mem.Sharon Ctr Sch
From: MikeT
Date: 05 Jul 09 - 08:55 PM

Just saw this, no words, but love and more love to you.

Mike

Subject: RE: Kaelan Paton(Sandy&Caroline)Memorial July 12
From: GUEST,Bruce Pratt
Date: 07 Jul 09 - 08:09 AM

Dear Patons. Janet and I were out of the country and I only learned of your loss a few days ago. I am heart-scalded, as I know of no family who more loves rivers. I recall a conversation with Sandy--I think it was at a Folk Next Door Concert--about our mutual love for songs about rivers and for the peace one gains from watching them run. David's love of paddling and your clan's respect for the beautiful waterways of this land make this tragedy all the more searing. As the father of a firefighter/legislator/whitewater guide, my respect for what Kaelan did to save others knows no bounds. There is no greater love nor courage than to imperil your own life to save and serve others. I regret that I cannot attend the memorial, but my grateful heart will be there. May songs and friends give you strength.
Bruce