Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)

Subject: Obit: Mary LaMarca
From: Jeri
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:06 PM

I received the following a little while ago thru another list. I have no words. She supported me, showed me a newly-hatched dragonfly once and just nurtured wonder.

Folks will know Mary from the FSGW Getaway, and although she hadn't posted much lately for obvious reasons, she was a Mudcatter from way back.

Love, Jeri

---

(Copied and Pasted)

Dear Friends,

This afternoon, August 10, my beloved singing partner, life partner and
wife, Mary LaMarca died after a five year battle with ALS, or Lou Gehrig's
disease. I believe she died peacefully, at home with her parents, me and her
favorite cat around her.

Monarch butterflies have been coming to the milkweed she planted for them by
the front door, and from which she harvested many of their eggs to nurture
to butterfly-hood and release. I had an almost palpable sense of her spirit
breaking free from its chrysalis, spreading its wings and joining them on
their mysterious journey to a far distant and unknown home.

Mary taught me how to both observe and participate in life; nature, music,
friends, plastic pink flamingos – eh, no, scratch that last. Truly, she made
possible the full and rewarding life we've had, and we will be ten times
less by one for her leaving.

Please forward this news on to any one who would want to know.

Love to all,

George Stephens

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: SINSULL
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:09 PM

Rest in peace, Mary. You have earned it. Better still, fly and soar as high as you can.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:12 PM

What a lovely tribute George, brought a tear to my eye.
May she rest in peace.
John

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Max
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:21 PM

farewell dear Mary.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Maryrrf
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:23 PM

I am very sorry to hear this. I hadn't had a chance to meet Mary personally, but I had seen her at the Getaway and I heard her and George perform at a delightful concert at the Washington Folk Festival festival at Glen Echo park. RIP.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: MMario
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:37 PM

I knew Mary only in the most casual of ways; through Getaway and Mudcat - but I know I will feel her loss; yet another melody we hear only in the echoes and memories.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Art Thieme
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:38 PM

George,
I am so sorry. I feel I knew her just from being here in this place with the two of you.

Be well.

Art Thieme

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: GUEST,Janie
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:44 PM

My condolences, George, to you and to all who loved her.

Janie

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: ranger1
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 02:51 PM

Mary was a kindred spirit, someone I could chatter on endlessly to about birds, bugs, flowers and who got just as excited about them as I did. I will miss her.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:06 PM

As people take this in and search for words, there will be so many things to say. Those of us who lived near her and saw her regularly for 20+ years, and supported her thru the hard times since the ALS was diagnosed, will try to explain what a hole this leaves in our lives.

Jeri said "she was a Mudcatter from way back." Indeed, from October of 1996...she made just under 1100 posts, but said more on folk music than many with thousands of post....(and "other" kinds of music,*wry grin* often teasing me as she did so.)

Mary was a gourmet cook, a bird watcher, a traveler, a knowledgeable gardener, and a worker who volunteered at our local folk festivals (plural) and at the National Folk Festival as it moved about the country.

She knew I worked with odd woods, and on several occasions brought me delightful pieces to play with.

She was a singer, a scholar of music and many other things.....and she was a friend.

   I will add stories later....and I am sure other will also.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Amos
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:09 PM

La Marca? Oh, no!!! I must protest. How heartbreaking!! What a bright light has passed from the stage. Dammit, I really protest! I am so sorry.

George, tears and condolences to you. Keep breathing.


Love,


Amos

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: SINSULL
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:17 PM

Godderdammerang
Says it all.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Micca
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:20 PM

George, My heartfelt condolences on your loss,to you and her friends and family, she was a One off thats for certain
I cannot say I knew Mary well but we struck up a friendship that was renewed each year at the Getaway and was a sort of marker each Getaway, you know, the check list, 1 check in, 2 find cabin, 3 greet friends, 4 Hug Mary.. and so On,
I feel a sense of loss out of all proportion to the amount of time and interaction we shared, I will miss her
Micca

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Joe Offer
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:35 PM

George, I'm sorry to hear that she's gone. She was a wonderful woman - joyful, wise, brilliant, gracious, generous, strong, funny - and a damn good singer. I'll miss her.
May she rest in peace, and may you take comfort in her memory.
-Joe Offer-

Click here to read her posts. You'll learn a lot.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Anglo
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:42 PM

The news came in last night, and I was devastated. We all knew it was just a matter of time, but it's still a huge shock when it happens. Infinitely more so for you, George, my heart goes out to you. She will be missed.
John

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Ferrara
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:44 PM

As Bill said, it's going to take some time even to begin to say what Mary meant in our lives. Memories are floating in my mind.... Every day there's something I want to tell her -- or ask her. Brilliant, multitalented, energetic, she grabbed life with both hands and wrought it into fascinating shapes. She lived her life very fully and well.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Fortunato
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:54 PM

Mary was a warm, lovely person. I knew her for many years and though I didn't know her well, I did know her to be continually helpful and positive.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:54 PM

Oh, how sad. I never met her, but we were buds here in Mudcat land. Go well, Mary.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: NOMADMan
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 04:02 PM

George,

Our most sincere condolences. We always enjoyed seeing you and Mary when you were able to make it to NOMAD, and we loved reading Mary's entertaining and informative posts here on Mudcat.

We have been repeating Mary's efforts with the monarch butterflies here in Connecticut. We released two more - numbers 11 and 12 for the season so far - just a very short while ago. They are headed your way.

Regards,
John (NOMADMan) Mazza (and Carol).

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: open mike
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 04:15 PM

ahh over 1,000 posts, but apparently none since 2007.
I will remember her when i see monarchs. My room mate
has reared several this year, and released several.
He has also taken some to nature centers in the area
for children to enjoy. Metamorphosis is a wonderful
thing. It is good to envision Mary flying now, free
from ALS.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Charley Noble
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 04:16 PM

George-

Thanks for taking the time to post this, and for providing some lovely words.

Mary will be missed by us all as well.

ALS has no mercy...

Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: JedMarum
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 04:30 PM

God Bless you Mary.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Alice
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 04:35 PM

George, I remember Mary from the her long ago postings.
May she rest in peace.
My deepest sympathy to you.

Alice

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: katlaughing
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 04:47 PM

(Coming in from a two week sabbatical to post to this.)

I had some lovely, fun and funny PMs from Mary back when she and Kath Westra were the winning bidders for necklaces I made and put in the auction. She was funny about hers, telling how much she liked critters, even the creepy-crawly ones and how you, George, weren't quite used to her penchant for going after black snakes (that was back in 1999.) She said she liked to show kids those critters weren't as scary/slimy as people thought.

I always knew we would have fun and enjoy meeting one another in 3D...guess now it will have to wait until I fly away, too.

Thank you for posting George's message. It is beautiful. Sad that she is gone, but look at the love she left behind. A life very well lived and an example we could all strive to follow.

My condolences, George. Bye, Mary.

luvyakat

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Severn
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 05:04 PM

A wonderful person and singer is gone and will be greatly missed. My best thoughts go out to you, George, and to all others near to her Those of us who have had the good fortune to listen to her sing, alone and with George and others were among the fortunate.

Not above taking a friendly swat at me for a bad groaner of a pun, though.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Snuffy
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 06:27 PM

What a lovely lady. I only met her the once, back in 2003 at the Getaway. Afterwards, back in Silver Spring at Jennifer and Bob's house, there were Mary, Colin Kemp and myself remained at the dinner table while the others retired to the music room. We spent an enchanting (and enchanted) hour or so just yarning and swapping Les Barker songs: she knew them all, of course. And then when we went to join the others she regaled us with her Götterdämmerung song which absolutely blew me away. She subsequently mailed me a beautifully produced copy of the song, which I treasure to this day.

I wish I was in Bayreuth now. Fare well, dear lady.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Barry Finn
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 06:57 PM

My sincere condolences to you George. Our loss of Mary weighs heavy on us all & most of us only had the pleasue of her presence in short doses. I can't begin to imagine the loss of your soul mate who you were blessed with having the company of all the time. I believe she was just as fortunate in having you. To have had Mary as even a fly by night friend was a gift heaven sent. I hope there's a better place that she can now relax & sing in & I hope time at some point will ease some your pain George. Good-bye Mary, seeing you always brought a light into my life.

Love
Barry

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Padre
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 10:24 PM

Gail joins me in sending our deepest sympathy to you, George. Mary was a wonderful person to be around, with her genuine joy of life in all its varied facets. I have included her on this week's prayer list. RIP, Mary


Padre

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: lisa null
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 11:15 PM

Well, Mary taught me not only what to plant in my garden to attract certain kinds of wildlife, she showed me what was already there: the weeds that suddenly turned into amazing native plants worth cherishing, the bugs, the shy small creatures I might have overlooked. Once she showed me a peeper. She was a generous advice giver-- telling me about everything from electric scooters to spice to her favorite reggae songs. I have been talking with people all day who just wanted to reminisce about all the ways she helped them appreciate the most marvelous basics of life: cats, food, plants, birds, song, books, and just being a good neighbor. She left us a lot to build on.

Here's to a great singer, a mischievous songwriter, and a fun, inquisitive, vital human being.

Oh yeah, here's to her wonderful husband.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 11:18 PM

Like several others here, I never met Mary, but reading this thread brings tears to my eyes. And what a lovely and loving tribute, George.

I'll look forward to some of those stories people have promised.

SRS

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: GUEST,DWR
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 11:23 PM

Some people are just special to us here at Mudcat. LaMarca is one of those.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: bbc
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 12:03 AM

I am so sorry to hear this news. I saw Mary, in person, a limited number of times, but had a clear sense of her as a good & talented person--one who I was glad to know! Peace to her & to you, George, & to all who loved her. The world was richer for her being among us!

With love & sympathy,

Barbara

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: EBarnacle
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 12:24 AM

I only met Mary a couple of times at Old Songs. We corresponded about her "Ring Cycle" and about her job. There was never any mention of sickness.

This makes the second time I have lost someone to ALS. Neither was good. Both will be missed.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: karen k
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 01:05 AM

This has been a really tough summer. So many good people gone. I knew Mary wasn't doing well when I saw Kathy Westra last month. George, I am saddened to learn that Mary is gone. How I loved the two of you singing together. I wish I was there to give you a hug. I will always remember Mary fondly, with great respect, as a friend and a wonderful singer. My condolences to you, George, to her family and to all in the folk ghetto who will miss her terribly.

Much love,
karen

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Pauline L
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 01:12 AM

Jeri, thank you for posting this. George, what you wrote about her was beautiful. My condolences go to you and everyone she was close to.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: jacqui.c
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 03:51 AM

Such a loss. Condolences to you George.

I am so glad that I knew Mary, she was one special person.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 04:19 AM

Such sad news.

I only met Mary the once but she was a wonderful person.

Condolences to George and all her family and friends.

Khatt

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Tinker
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 06:25 AM

Mary was one of the faces I looked for at Getaway. Yes, a musician, but the warmth and grace and dignity .... and humor .... are what I remember most.   Blessings and light (and hugs all around)

tinker

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: kendall
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 06:43 AM

It's so easy to grieve the passing of such as Mary but with the deaths of so many of my dear friends these past few years I'm learning to appreciate their lives as I knew them.
We saw her last March and I knew we would never meet again, but I'm grateful that I knew her.
My deepest sympathies to you, George. I'm also honored to know you.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: maeve
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 06:55 AM

"I'm learning to appreciate their lives as I knew them."(kendall)

Yes, Kendall. That's one of the gifts such dear friends give us.

maeve

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: RoyH (Burl)
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 07:15 AM

Dear Friend George, Elaine and I are so sorry to hear this news even though it is not unexpected. Our memories of you both are amongst our happiest ones. We send you our deepest sympathies at this time of grief. Love, Roy & Elaine.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: catspaw49
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 07:55 AM

What a sad day......All my best to you George. Like so many others here, I knew Mary only through Mudcat but I will always remember her well. Her positive attitude and sense of humor were matched with intelligence and passion that came across in her written words.....I regret I never knew her in person.

Some of her posts "back in the day" on the meaning of folk/what is folk/etc. were some of the very best ever written on the subject. And when she acquired a charango, she took my chiding in stride and posted me back with both a Possum recipe and one for Armadillo as well. A very "complete" person.........

She was a great champion of trad folk and in keeping the tradition alive in this new age. I will never forget a comment she made and I'll leave you all with it.............

"I may be a Purist Snob, but I'm a flexible Purist Snob if it helps make traditional music more available!"

Good-bye Mary and many thanks.


Spaw

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Tradsinger
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 08:05 AM

Carol and I are very sorry to hear the news, as we knew Mary. So condolences to you from England. I know the DC folk community will rally round you and comfort you.

All are thoughts are with you

Gwilym (and Carol)

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Charlie Baum
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 08:54 AM

Nature lover, plant identifier, mouse wrangler, Wisconsin enthusiast, holder and expresser of well-formed ideas about music and community, memorizer of long songs with too many words for the rest of us, raiser of awareness of handicapped accessibility, and the one member of the neighborhood cohort who may have been younger than I was. I will miss her.

Beautiful words, George!

--Charlie Baum

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 10:11 AM

I met Mary & George when they visited Sydney a few years back.

condolences to George & family & friends

sandra

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: GUEST,Margaret Walters
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 05:51 PM

John Warner and I were among other Sydney folkies who met Mary and George on their visit to Sydney. Mary was a remarkable woman and we could sense her vast knowledge and understanding of folk and other music, her capacity for musicality, humour, endurance and her love of life. She obviously impressed many people with her boundless enthusiasm for all around her. May she rest in peace. Thank you for your words, George.

Love Margaret

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: GUEST,Clarice
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 06:57 PM

I am deeply saddened that Mary has died. Yes, I knew it was coming, and yes, it is a relief to know that she no longer suffers, but it is such a loss to know that she is no longer on this earth.

Mary, good bye. You will be missed.

And loving thoughts to George, who has been at Mary's side through it all.

Clarice

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: GUEST,Patricia C.
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 11:01 PM

Everyone is special, but Mary was one of the really special ones. She brought a sense of wonder to everything (as well as a sense of humor). I feel honored to have known her. George - I am so very very sorry for your loss. And I am so sorry for the loss felt by those of you who were so close to her for so very long. If I, at this distance, am feeling an overwhelming sadness, it is only a microscopic portion of what the rest of you are going through.

It was always a joy to hear George and Mary sing at NOMAD and other festivals.

When my son and I were visiting Judy & Dennis and Kathy some years ago, Mary came over and pointed out a remarkable moth on a tree in Judy & Dennis' back yard. She had my son (and me) fascinated about it. Late last week I saw one of those same moths in our back yard - not sure what made me notice it because it blended in so completely - I had never seen one here. Since I have no sense of time, I don't remember which day I saw it, but I don't believe in coincidences.

Prayers, hugs, and deep sympathies,

Patricia

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 06:22 AM

Pistachio, in Germany (temporarily)

Like SRS I never met this lady but I'm sorry for the loss you all suffer. It is wonderful, tho sad, to read all the remarks about someone who clearly touched everyone who met her.

Please accept my sympathy.
Indeed it is a sad time for many.

George, take care.
Hazel.

Subject: RE: Obit: Mary LaMarca (10 Aug 2009)
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 10:35 AM

We knew it was coming...and it's a relief that she no longer suffers from this cruelest of all diseases, be we're saddened and miss her.

I'll think of her in so many songs, in watching the birds she was so knowledgable about, in the flamingoes that litter my house, and in the earrings that shared her life and are now a part of mine.

What we've once held in our heart is never gone...but I miss her here in real life.

George, our thoughts are very much with you.

Linn